Family members drain us even more than “outsiders” sometimes, Monica. Emotionally, financially and physically.
I have come to the point in my life when I am trying to stand back. (I had my share of angry men-my own son being the worst -I am very ashamed to say I often reacted angrily to him or indeed often instigated the aggression.)
As a child, I hid and as an adult I also hid from my son’s anger (in the casino)
This Christmas I will protect myself from chaos. I am making all the usual preparations. If my family come home I will be glad. If they decide to spend Christmas elsewhere I will be equally glad.
I have been reflecting a lot on previous Christmases .
The onus was always on me to “get it all together”. Yes, everyone helped but only under instruction from me. The onus was always on me to deliver /collect everyone which becomes exhausting and when things went tits up, I was told “you are a controller”.
I guess I am a controller but from now on I will concentrate on controlling myself and let everyone else do their own thing!
Can you suggest to your sister to get help with her alcohol problem?
