Suicide or telling your family, both hard things. Gambling has given you 2 years of hell. Your suicide will give your wife and daughter a lifetime of it, could you really do that to them?
A much better idea would be to learn how to stop this, not tomorrow or after you’ve had one more attempt to win your money back. Stop it now.
I know it feels impossible to you, I promise you I know. Many of us here have been suicidal at times, seriously we have, it is no joke.
Gambling is no joke.
Tell me Erekle would you agree that you have become powerless against gambling, it surely sounds like it. Do you truly believe your life has become unmanageable because of it? Considering suicide I would think so.
There are lots of things you can do to make gambling difficult, you can buy software that will block gambling sites, if its online you gamble. If you gamble at venues they will have an exclusion programme.
The two things I mention will not cure you but they will help prevent you gambling.
Have you looked for GA? (Gamblers Anonymous). They have meetings in most countries.
There is no quick fix my friend, but suicide is definatley not the answer.
You may think it impossible but you can stop. I gambled for about 35 years, I havn’t gambled for over a year now you can stop.
For me I had to learn to talk and open up to people, I had to start being honest. I would highly recommend that you seek a counsellor to talk to.
Have you spoken to anyone about this?
If not I would highly recommend you do. You are not unique when it comes to the predicament you are in. I would like to suggest you look at this story.
http://www.gamblingtherapy.org/en/first-post
It may just give you a bit of hope.
Take care.
Your wife and daughter love you, you are in trouble they don’t want to see you suffer.
Your wife and daughter would have a very painful life if you killed yourself.
Give your wife the respect she deserves and tell her of your problem, she can maybe hold the family finances.
You have qualifications, and once the numbness wears off, although you have a lot of debt, I’m sure you will have a good earnings potential and be able to get into repayment plans to clear your debt.
No good doing that until you’ve spoken about your gambling to someone. You are not an idiot or stupid. You have a genuine and real problem.
You can get it sorted out.