Today is a day that is filled with guilt. It’s hubby’s birthday. Money is tight due to my gambling and I can’t afford presents which I feel guilty as hell about.
He says he doesn’t mind as me and the kids are making him a birthday cake and there is no point in spending money that we cannot afford to spend. He’s just happy that I am finally getting the help that I need and putting so much effort into my recovery.
It still doesn’t get rid of that guilty feeling.
The ‘what ifs’ the ‘whys’.
Apart from that all my barriers are still in place and I am still feeling quite positive about my recovery.
Today I will not gamble.
To Kathryn
I hope work wasn’t too hard on you. I am trying to find encouragement and positivity in the little things in my life. I am sorry to hear you lost your house but I am glad you have taken it as a learning curve and that you have got your life back on track. I am hoping one day I can do the same.
Lots of love xxx
To Laura
Thank you so much for the information. It was a fantastic read and I have now got more insight on how my gambling brain works. I also signed up for the other chatroom. Although I haven’t used it yet I am planning to. I know we shouldn’t dwell on the things we have lost due to gambling but today is a particularly hard one for me. I hope you are having a fantastic gamble free day.
Lots of love xxxx