So lost still, feel like so depressed, sad, lost financially, job hours got cut. Debt, it’s so hard to smile and have conversations with friends and co workers, my performance is gone this week, don’t want to workout, eat healthy. Man I’m letting. My mind beat me so bad here, I’m so strong usually and have such good will power, I feel defeated. Ya the meetings help, but still hard to go on.. I know it’s not even that much money compared tk some, but it’s the feeling of disgust for putting myself through this again for the 100th time. Man.. it’s craxy how gambling can ruin your life and happiness in just 3 days.. we’ll 3 days this time, 10 years it’s ruined mine. Every relapse has been worse than the last, this one hurt the most though. Because every time I lost before, I still had savings. This time I blew through every penny and tapped into maxing our my line of credit and over draft , what a mess. I’m feeling like such a losrr
