Well the whole point of JP was to not compare yourself to any one else except yourself. So not that you were once better then your friends or were you could have been if you didn’t gamble. Those answers are impossible to give. So it doesn’t matter what you did in the past. The only question is : Are you in a better place/ person then you were yesterday? ( And yesterday only).
Also, waiting for your demon to knock on you door is not a great long term strategy. Better put everything in place so the demon does not get a chance to knock.