I feel like I had another setback and motivator all at the same time. I posted yesterday that my and my daughters phones were cut off yesterday because i owed money. I owe money everywhere, as most of us gamblers do, and had been ignoring it up until recently. I also have a problem with shopping- mostly grocery- and have a house full of food and necessities to last a while. I have been trying to budget and stop shopping so much the last couple of weeks and have been doing well, and have been starting to exist on the stockpile that i have in my house. The feeling I get from being able to pay down part of an outstanding debt is a powerful one and is motivating me to budget even more and be more resourceful so that I can get myself back to the point where i actually am paying current bills and not old amounts outstanding. I used to have my bills set on auto payments so that each bill was paid in part each week, with extra being paid on the accounts so that i never owed. I had an excellent credit score and lots of available credit. That is not the case anymore and i will have to try very hard to repair the damage I’ve done over the past 5 years. I have a strong finance background, believe it or not, and have the capabilities to make a budget and stick to it but it’s a struggle because of my impulse control issues. My entire life is in need of an overhaul and that’s what I have begun to try today. I am regimenting my day a bit more so that I am accountable for what I do. I feel that I need the feeling of success on a few levels to help with the crap that keeps flying into my life, so I will create it in any way I know how. I hope that you all are g.f. and happy today.
