Today I did my first set of my steps for my red road recovery based off the wellbriety steps. I cried alot last night when I started them as it brought up alot of stuff for me. I needed to heal the cultural part of myself so thats why I chose to do these steps. My sponsor gifted me with a drum today and put a song into about 4 legged creatures that she learned from her elders. She said she chose that song as I have such a strong connection to animals like my dog. She made the drum for me which in my culture is a huge deal. I feel so incredibly grateful that I’m finding this path for myself right now. The teaching and readings from the program I’m starting are so inspiring and hitting alot of the right places for me to heal every part of myself properly. One thing I liked is it was talking about how before the settlers came that they new they would bring 4 mind changers ( addiction). One of those things was a card.I new that ment gambling. That hit a huge cord with me last night as I felt immense pain that I was drawn into the dark side. But I’m happy that I’m finding the right path back to myself. Culturally I have many different beliefs because im interracial and only part native so I have teachings from my English grandmother but also from my first nations side to so I’m really lucky to have so many things to keep me grounded now that I’m willing to look at them more. I’m really grateful for the opportunity to find my true identity because ive been lost for along time. Without recovery and the willingness to dig deep into my traumas and heal them i wouldn’t be doing this work today.
