hi,
there is always hope, life is so precious, refuse to be defeated and keep trying to recover till the last day of your life regardless of how many times you relapsed and how bad is your life. because I know something for sure is the count of your gambling days is going up your life will get better and better.
in regards to GOD, to be honest I am an atheist so there is no one up there controlling me or supporting me, or punishing me in life or after. I am on my own and this is librating me, what I am doing is my own responsibility, my recovery is my own responsibility. don’t wait for a magic solution you are on your own and you should get as much real support as you can from friends, family GA ..etc. I am not asking you to be an atheist just I am telling you the problem is not up in the sky it is down in you and you have to sort it out.
stay away from investing or trading it is gambling in fact this is what I am addicted to.
I hope you all the best, keep posting and work on your recovery every day, every day free of gambling is a day toward a better future.