That’s great to here libu I’m glad you chose to see a counselor. Wishing you lots of strength to get through this process of recovery.
Today I’m 80 days gamblefree I’m really happy that through all the crap going on in my life I chose to stay away from addiction and move forward in a positive direction. I’ve taken on more roles as a journeyman now so I now get to work on jobsites and run the shop for my company. The site I’m on right now has lots of other female tradeworkers so it’s nice to see. I’m usually the only girl around so it’s nice to feel a little more comfortable. I work with only men for my company and I’ve just got used to it. I find my demeanor is not as femine as it used to be and sometimes I miss the times I used to where lots of makeup and dress up. I find now I look like a bum most of the time because I’m covered in dirt and ripped up burned clothes. Since I’ve been on this new journey of healing past trauma and trying to find myself again I’ve been trying to think about how I can do better self care for myself. Since my ex and I broke up I can’t suggest nice dinner dates where I can dress up so I have to find a different outlet to try and take care of myself so I dont always look like a beat up tradesworker. I had an old woman cross the street and look down at me for being dirty wearing a hard hat on the way to my car today. I literally work my ass off everyday and I make alot of money doing it but for some reason I still get looked down on. I would think most people would be impressed that a chick can hold down a job like I have but I guess there’s alot stigma still. I just no I want to feel better mind,body,and soul. So I no that requires looking after myself externally to. I guess it’s time to trade my steel toes in for some high heels once and awhile.
Today I’m grateful for thr chance to learn more skills at work. I’m grateful for the beautiful weather today. I’m grateful for another day gamblefree and clean and sober.