Today I started to have a bit of uncomfortable sadness come up briefly. I chose to stay home and try to relax a bit because I tend to keep myself way to busy where I distract myself instead of feeling or dealing with things. Seems like a common theme us addicts do lol. I still have alot of work to do on myself and my sponsor and I are doing a step 4 around my resentments especially around my relationship. I kind of been postponing it by trying to have some positive happy times but I needed to start doing the writing down about it. So today I did. I sat with all that negatively at wrote it all out so my sponsor and I can go over it next weekend. It’s a necessary process to continue healing so I’m happy I allowed myself to sit and do the work. I dont think anybody likes doing step 4s but they are the core to fixing the internal struggles from being an addict. I’m glad to rid myself of those thoughts and see how I contributed to alot of those resentments ect. So today I’m grateful for 12 step programs and having the ability to do the work involved. I’m grateful to have my own space to heal in. I’m grateful for allowing myself to truly “feel” even when it’s uncomfortable.
