And today is a new day…. I havent posted for a couple of days and now I have a bit of time so I will do so. I would like to say that today is day 9 because I held out and was strong, but that would be false. I am at day 9 because of a software update to my gamban has made it impossible to gamble on my phone anymore. I didnt do it on my own, but i did it. I have been thinking about going to casinos nice they begin their opening again without restrictions. I just cant fathom not gambling at all ever again. I have been feeling ” the itch” lately and have to try to make sure that i have no days that i can go. I know that it will get easier with time but the call of the slots is strong when i think that i cant do it anymore. I need to retrain my brain to want something else and the feeling of having a little money this week has been nice. It’s a good thing that i work 7 days a week at this point and i need to stay focused. I’m going to start planting seeds soon for growing in my grow room so I’m thinking about summer and my garden. I’m looking forward to a productive summer so that my time at home can be better spent now. It’s funny. When i found that i couldn’t gamble anymore on my phone i felt free. I felt a weight lifted that had been sitting on my back for years. Then i felt fear. Where would i go when the feeling is strong? I need to deal with that. Thanks and I hope everyone is strong today.
