I feel so sad when I hear the stories of others like you who are at their worst. I can identify with all you say even the part about thinking of ending it all, and I too have a daughter that keeps me from even entertaining the idea. I hold on to the knowledge that I didnt get myself into this in one day and it will take more than one day to get out. Every day, every dollar that you dont put in is a victory. We know that we will end up putting every single cent we have in, so a dollar saved is a victory! If you have paid back two grand, that is great. Don’t look at how long it will take you to get out. Each day I look at the money I still have left, where it is going to go, and the feelings of relief start to replace the panic. It’s a good feeling. I am in a good amount of debt as well and have taken on a second job to try to earn more and keep myself busy. I realize that if I keep all of my income and dont gamble any of it that I will be out of debt a lot quicker. Often we panic about the debt we are in without fully realizing that if we just STOP gambling the situation will rectify itself. Gambling has gotten us in and will keep us in this situation unless we stop. Easy solution if you are not an addict, right? Limit the money that is available to you. Put it into an account that you cant access online. Call credit cards and tell them to freeze your use of them. I reported mine lost so that I cant use them to gamble. If they send you new ones dont activate them right away. Dont even open the envelope. Pay bills as soon as money is in your account so you can’t use it to gamble. We all need help. Help yourself by limiting access to funds until you are stronger. You will get there. Take your sorrow and turn it into anger. Gambling and the places that offer if have ruined the last two years of your life. Take them back. I hope that you stay strong today
