I didn’t know I was fasting for a spiritual reason.
I didn’t know I was abstaining from food for a specific amount of time for a spiritual purpose.
Some people eat for 8 hours and fast for 16 hours a day. – inter-mitten fasting
Some people abstain from carbohydrates and sugar in their diet. – keto diet
Some people eat for 6 days and fast for one day.
Some fast for 40 days.
Why did I fast?
I was trying to overcome temptation and was looking for direction.
I was really very disappointed, sad and frustrated at the temptation that I keep falling into.
What is fasting?
Fasting is putting down the desire of the flesh
The desire of the flesh is “give me more” … I am hungry for more money, gambling, food, alcohol and sex. When we are fasting, we are saying NO to the desire.
What did I experience in fasting?
I experience many strong mental and physical cravings.
The craving and urge come and go, some time the temptation was weak but some time the temptation and craving was so strong that I cheated on my fasting, I slip and relapse.
It reflected on my vulnerability and weakness at the moment.
There are progress but no perfection for me.
It was a big relief to be practicing total abstinence from my addiction without the heavy financial losses from gambling and ill health from alcohol when I fail.
What are the benefits?
Today I had 9 kg weight loss over 2 months.
The experience has strengthened my belief in recovery from all addictions. The progress has given me more confident to carry on with the recovery program.
The slip, fall and failures warn me not to test myself as I can lose control and start bingeing uncontrollably when I least expected it. The bingeing was the same for food, alcohol and gambling.
If I relapse, it was not the end of the world, I should stop the digging and pick myself up immediately and continue with the journey in recovery.
Recovery is not a single event in my life, it was a life journey, a lifestyle…it was never perfect.
How many times have I failed WHEN I WAS TESTED in the face of temptation.
How many times have I given in to strong mental and physical craving.
I need to build up my mental strength to manage the stress and challenges in the future.
