Thanks for your post Laura.
Yes, the Spell is broken.
The Illusion shattered.
The Miracle has happened.
“What’s Another Year” is the title of a famous song. My take on it , when I chose it as a title to my thread was “what’s the point in continuing to be part of something that had failed me”.
That is how I felt about gambling at the time. I had given it everything and got nothing in return. It had drained me and left me empty. That’s the nature of gambling. It takes everything.
Yes, I went to the GA meeting. It turned out to be quite powerful. Six men turned up, ranging from 20 something to 60 something.
There was a very honest and humble atmosphere in the room. One man with a long recovery had had a bad relapse. I think that always brings the rest of the group to the realization that “this could be me”. That was voiced by another member, also in long term recovery. I wish could say more about that meeting but anonymity forbids. Suffice to say I did feel a connection with the people in the room.
Something that is often missing in Real Life.
Regarding living Life without caring what others think, Laura I think we sometimes get that wrong. I care very deeply about other people but many years ago I learned that my happiness does not depend on how other people perceive me. In the same way that gambling has no power over me until I place that first bet, people have no power over my feelings unless I allow them to take that power from me.
I learned this the hard way. For the best part of my life I believed my happiness depended on others. It doesn’t. It really doesn’t. Deep down, regardless of any circumstance or situation, I am happy. Lots of people find that strange. You have to experience it to grasp it. It just “is”!
Gambling brought no happiness. It brought thrills and every thrill brought it’s hangover but “happiness” is very different to a thrill.
I think , deep down you get what I mean Laura.
I wish you and yours a Blessed New Year!
