Mav,
There are a couple of positives that I see in your posts about this latest relapse. One, you came clean right away to your spouse. That is something that in the past you would not have done, you would have kept it hidden so you could gamble again and again. So kudos to you for that!
Secondly, you are reaching out for help right away. This is also a huge positive step. As I am sure you have heard/read, we must first realize we are powerless over this gambling addiction, and reach out for help. Reaching out for help immediately after relapse shows yourself and the important others around you that you truly want to get better and can’t do it on your own.
In my experience, my early days of recovery/relapse, I would continue to hide it for a time before finally breaking down and telling someone. Or wait to be caught and confronted.
So although this feels like a very bad day I think you are making tremendous progress. Hang in there, it will get better!
Very sincerely,
Fritz