theend for your msg means a lot, I hope things are getting better for you.
I have had a hymn stuck in my head today from my church days,
This is it
1
What a Friend we have in Jesus,
All our sins and griefs to bear!
What a privilege to carry
Everything to God in prayer!
O what peace we often forfeit,
O what needless pain we bear,
All because we do not carry
Everything to God in prayer!
2
Have we trials and temptations?
Is there trouble anywhere?
We should never be discouraged,
Take it to the Lord in prayer.
Can we find a friend so faithful
Who will all our sorrows share?
Jesus knows our every weakness,
Take it to the Lord in prayer.
3
Are we weak and heavy-laden,
Cumbered with a load of care?
Precious Savior, still our refuge—
Take it to the Lord in prayer;
Do thy friends despise, forsake thee?
Take it to the Lord in prayer;
In His arms He’ll take and shield thee,
Thou wilt find a solace there.
A really really difficult day today I wrote a long email to mother explaining my situation, my life over the last few years, hardest thing I have ever done but she knew something was wrong as I have not spoken to her for about six months now apart from a. Brief merry Christmas , I think it just got to the point am sick of living a life if pretence and lies pretending all is well ….anyway I gave her pre warning by email that there was an email coming that was going to be a big shock to her and to ,et me know when she had received that, she replied to say she had received that email and awaiting the email, I sent it a few hours ago now but have not received a reply as yet, I fully expect her not to want anything to do with me again, I am very low, each time I think things cannot possibly get any worse , my life never ceases to surprise me.
Am not sure how this is going to effect me I feel very bad for putting this on her, surely oblivion the protected safe is better having big regrets, I guess all illusions now shattered.