Thanks everyone for the posts. I just checked back and the last time I posted here was April 8, which is nearly a month ago. I have been posting on the monthly page and pages of others. I don’t know why but I am having a tough time lately with thoughts of gambling. I am wondering if it is because I am at 6 months without putting money in those slots/vlts. I know that the last time I got to 6 months that I had to fight every day to stay away and then I got to 7 moths and then gambled. I don’t know if it is fear that I will do the same or is it the addiction and I need a fix. I know the last time I started gambling after 7 months it was September 30 that I first went and it continued to November 1 so it tough to get back to ******** days. I was not ******** days for a while I was focusing on a gamble free life, but there is something about beating the longest gamble free time you have. I know if I keep thinking like this then I will be back gambling and I don’t want that. I have to remember that I am still paying gambling debt and the feeling of despair and hating myself when I gamble. I know that I will not win as I will continue gambling until I lose every last cent and keep running to get more and more cash. I don’t carry the credit card with me any more where I got the cash to gamble. I remember the last time I felt like this I did not take any money with me so I could not gamble. It is good that I am aware of it though as it keeps me on my toes and realize that I cant be complacent. I am so aware now though that gamble free time does not mean anything as it is so easy to be back to Day 1. I will not gamble today and that is all that I will focus on!!!! Wishing everyone a gamble free day!!!One day at a time my sweet lord…
