[Viper]

Sadly I have no support in the UK, it appears that I have none in real life. I have been in the chat room a few times and received some good advice.
I did just do a runner in the end, I couldn’t face my debts, I know I have only deferred them for now and will eventually have to face up to them.
I am currently living in a tent and working cash in hand, so with no money and no cards I cannot gamble, so at least I am not making my situation worse.
It really was not a good plan, it is lonely and isolating and I miss my fiancee dreadfully, I messed her about with my gambling, the depression it caused and how it made be behave. I would do anything to turn back the clock and have sought help and at least made a start on recovery before I told her. We found each other late in life and now due to me have lost each other.
Wallowing in self pity right now, I will try and make the chat later on.

[Viper]

Back in Belgium, so overwhelmed, and now lost my job. Will sell what belongings I have, pack a back pack and disappear. Will travel/work where I can, but leaving everything behind me, debts included. Can’t live with what I have done, so a disappearing act for me.
Thanks for your support everyone.

[Viper]

Thought I would make a start, but where? how?
I am a fifty year old male, currently living and working in Belgium and I have an uncontrollable gambling addiction. This has lost me my fiancee as she has had enough, she has moved away and doesn’t want anything to do with me – she had a gambler as her previous partner and has run to the hills. I had hoped she would understand, which is one of the reasons I told her. I have no money and my credit cards are maxed out.
My father – who was my main support – died and I came back to the UK to arrange the funeral and sort things out.

The funeral was Friday and was an awful affair, just me, the vicar and his wife. I just couldn’t come into chat last night I was in no fit state.
Today I have written a few new lists as suggested by Charles, I have labelled them each day of the week and will try to work through them fully each day.
I’m fifty yet now feel a little lost lad, I have no family, friends are few and far between, and I am lost. Right now I cannot gamble as I am using my works laptop that I brought over with me, they have a tracking system on it that shows where you go, so I dare not let work find out that I gamble.

I feel like my life is on hold while I am over here, I have too much to sort out to even begin to think about where to start with my finances and stopping my gambling. I know I will be going back to Belgium next weekend I think, if everything is done over here.
I just want to run away, take no cards with me, leave the debt behind and somehow survive from doing maybe odd jobs or bar work so I don’t have any real money worries.
Would that be so bad a thing to do? Running from my debt, would it save my destruction from gambling, I don’t know.
That was hard, I will try and return to chat this week.

[Author]

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