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Well done on 2 G – free weeks, Fish Face.
The struggle subsides as time goes on.
Keep postponing that next bet.
Think of how we struggle when we succumb to the urge to gamble.
It is so NOT worth it!Hi Cathy!
‘Hope all is well with you and with your son?
You asked on my thread if my son is a CG?
I honestly have to say I do not know.
He has been living a very secret life for quite a few years. Acting like some type of reclusive V.I.P./Big Shot/Celebrity who is not answerable for his actions to anybody. On his visits home (which are very rare) we are treated to his charming over indulgent gifts or a barrage of verbal abuse, aggression and general uproar. This has been the pattern for about seven years. Limits mean nothing to him. I haven’t seen him since November 28th, except for a brief conversation on Christmas night (he did a “no show” over Christmas-It was I who called him) when he was full of self pity and remorse for his own loss. ….Fast forward to March 1st, Ash Wednesday, when I got the “urgent call” from his brother……
I would be vey surprised if he gambles but you never can tell. He HATED gambling with a vengeance and made no secret of how he felt about my gambling and will still dip my nose in it at every opportunity possible. He certainly lives way beyond his means. Spends money (when he has it) as if it’s going out of fashion (as I did) and is generous to a fault. He drinks to excess . Smokes a lot and most likely takes “high class” (sic) drugs. I’m guessing that is how he got hooked up with loan sharks and caused all this distress. He is ruthless. I am still in shock regarding his recent “debt”. He owes me and his father a lot of money. He hasn’t had the manners to even text or call us . Quite frankly I do not want to see him until I put all this hurt behind me and until he makes major changes in his life. He has ruled over our family for too long.
Just pray for him please Cathy and thank you for your concern and support.All these things can be changed I- did -it.
The answers lie with your own soul.
The “bag of tools” awaits pickup!Nobody can take your 2 G free years away Maverick. It is sad that you “slipped”/gambled but that’s what CGs do when we take our eye off the ball.
I know you will bounce back Mav. GA will be always there for you.
I went to a meeting tonight and the young man who sat beside me was in tears. Shaking with shock . Heart breaking. When we know where gambling will lead , all illusions are smashed.
Well done on being so honest Mav.
Keep posting.Hi DN and welcome to GT
The line that stood out to me, in your first post, was “I want to play all the time”. I can relate to that! I learned, along the way though, that a Compulsive Gambler can only play for a certain time i.e. until the money runs out. To elaborate, A CG will ALWAYS play until the money runs out. Here comes the next line.” I want to play all the time, but I can’t handle the consequences”. Herein lies the reality of compulsive gambling, DN. We cannot have the “thrill” without the “hangover”. “Fun” and “Grief” always go hand in hand, so the question we need to answer is not “How do I stop” but “How do I cut this torture out of my life?” You have answered your own question. STOP GAMBLING!
With regard to your son, DN, I am presently going through a most horrendous situation with my son (same age as your son). If you want to know where bailing out leads, read my thread.
The reason we keep going back to the “scene of the crime” is quite clear. The human mind has a mechanism which obliterates bad memories and boosts pleasant experiences.
Gambling is an illusion, DN. Until we break through that falsehood, we will be forever a Gambling Slave.
Try to take it hour by hour. Every hour that you don’t gamble is a success. The hours turn to days . The days to weeks. The weeks to months and on it goes. Gambling wrecks lives and steals EVERYTHING from us. It is possible to reclaim your “Everything”.
One day at a time.
Stay focused!Just want to wish you all the best in GMA, Paul.
I know you will make the most of this wonderful opportunity.
God bless!Paul, I am so delighted to hear you will be going to GMA on Monday. I prayed that your place would come up soon.
You have born your “cross” with dignity , despite the hard times. In my experience , Paul very few “professionals” understand gambling problems. I did meet 3 priests in the course of my gambling “career” who “got it”. One told me to go to GA and gave me an address to write to him if I wanted further help, another said “Pray to St Camillus , he was a gambler”, the other asked had I enough money to get me through that Easter and told me where I could go for financial help . I was totally broke that Easter and at a low point . He was very compassionate.I think it all depends on their own experiences of life, whether its a priest, doctor, teacher or whoever. The people who understand us most are fellow CGs.
As you know Paul it will not be easy to undo years of damage in 14 weeks but this is you CHANCE. Your blessing! I know you won’t waste it.
I want you to know you will be in my thoughts and prayers every day during your time in GMA.
It is never too late to start again. Take it one day at a time Paul. You will meet great friends in GMA.
You are not alone!Well done JT.
Even at times when I “hoped and prayed” money would be safe , I always set some money aside. Even when I handed over money I still kept a little stash ” just in case money”.
My advice is to tell your wife NOT to give you any money under any circumstances.
Does she understand you are a CG?
Can she go to Gamanon?
CGs can charm the birds from the trees, JT. Your wife could be easily tricked. Can you put that money in an account which will require two signatures when you want to make withdrawals?
I’m not judging you JT but when I left myself open with a large amount of money it vanished. It was too late then.So good to see you , Laura.
I think of you often.
I’m still here too
“Pulling the divil by the tail” as they say, but this time he is squealing!
You know what needs to be done, Laura.
Keep coming back!JT, I can’t reiterate Charles’ advice loudly enough regarding your expected sum of money.
I won’t go into details here. Anyone who knows my tale of woe will know I ignored advice in relation to a “lump sum”.
‘Thought I had already learned every lesson. ‘Said “I wouldn’t dream in a million years of gambling this money” (which was my last chance of financial security). …..
Suffice to say , it vanished in less than a week.
Tell your wife BEFORE it arrives .
By the way , does she know you’re a CG??Better to use “adding up” than “c o u n ting”.
I used to spend ALL NIGHT LONG adding and subtracting, money I lost and owe.
I only do it occasionally now. I keep small notes in my purse I love counting them Its different than c o u n t ing Spent /gambled money…
nite for now
Bed time
My gambling dreams/nightmares come less often too.
They were almost as scary as the reality!Gambling always brings us to a low level.
I often felt I would have been better off if I had been raped, mugged and molested . At least I wouldn’t have had to spend the drive home convincing myself I had a great night out! First hand torture and self destruction.
Who in God’s name wants that sort of Life?
We were very SICK people masquerading as big shots!
What’s done is done JT.
The best we can do now is keep our focus on TODAY.
Just for today, I will not gamble!Just read your post on Dan’s thread, JT.
I didn’t ever have the pleasure/opportunity/misfortune to experience the highs/lows/ of glamorous Vegas. (Lots of people I know go on holidays there).
All I needed to wreck my life was a few old fashioned low tec slot machines in dingy arcade cum casinos in any town that I could reach fast enough by car.
A CG will settle for very little to achieve the buzz, in the end
“for no other reason than personal pleasure” as you say.
Gambling is one hell of a SELFISH habit.
Recovery has to be somewhat selfish too.Missed you in the Group tonight, Paul.
What’s the latest?
Did you ban from the local bookies?
Give us an update when you are ready.Hi JT.
I wanted to say Hi and welcome but I didn’t know which thread to post on.
It takes a while to get the hang of things here but for now I will just say, I have read all your posts.
Well done on reaching out for support.
It’s never too late.
Gambling has the potential to ruin us so why take the risk.
Keep posting.