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Just for today, I will not gamble!
Nobody can take a step for you, Lorraine but people do listen
I guess we need to learn how to roll with the punches. Some get more knocks than others. Some have better coping skills. Some are thick skinned and don’t give a damn.
Peculiar mix isn’t it?
All I DO know is that gambling makes every bad situation worse, despite the appearance of offering temporary relief.
Gambling prevents us from seeing beyond the next bet.
Crazy!I will join you Shaun
Used to do Monthly Pacts with members a few years ago
Some members had reservations
Felt it could be setting ourselves up for a fall
But whatever helps new members, I’m prepared to go along
One day at a time
Just for today, August 1st, I will not gamble!GT members do not give advice. We don’t judge, but we do answer questions when asked. We try to give support and recommend various ways to help members who request help.
From what I see (read) you have not taken any of the suggestions on board. For that reason, like Geordie, I sometimes wonder if this is all a game to you gvralls. I still want to give you the benefit of the doubt, however so in answer to your question, CGs do have pent up urges, and in my experience do have withdrawal symptoms.
What keeps us on a “even keel”is the knowledge that our desires can be indulged sooner or later. Its like holding your breath for a chest Xray. When the right time comes we explode!Do we always act on the advice we are given, Lily?
I usually do the opposite!! It’s difficult to say “I was wrong!”
Relationships ebb and flow.
Let’s hope yours’ will take up where it left off in due course.
Taking time out to cool off won’t do any harm.
Time is a great healer.
Yes, Life goes on.Jenny, I haven’t much time to write just now, but when I read that you child is going on visits to her dad, where her most basic needs are being neglected, it strikes me as being tantamount to child neglect. No child should be exposed to such an unsettling environment. She deserves better. Her dad seems irresponsible right now.
Gambling, as I recall is just one of your “Ex’s” problems.
Have you considered contacting the Social Services? If you are referred through them, legal aid should be free.
You are coping very well, Jenny.
Keep posting. I think of you a lot. XSorry to read of your setback, Logic.
It is understandable that you would “clutch at straws”, It is difficult to let go.
The good news is you have gained a new layer of awareness.
“What you are aware of, you are in control of; what you are not aware of is in control of you”!
Don’t look back.Sad to say, Frankie, your actions are making it possible for your “CG” to continue gambling.
CGs are ten steps ahead.
When I was gambling, I set up scenarios where my enablers (I had two) would always be on the back foot so that I could always make them feel my gambling was their fault.
Another sad thing , Frankie is that a CG’s behaviour can turn enablers into deceitful people i.e. lying about cost of bills etc.
Give him a free reign would be my suggestion. In time he will hit rock bottom. No one can tell how long that will take though. I hit many rock bottoms and there was a trap door in each one.
CGs who are “thrown out” know they will be taken back. We surround ourselves with vulnerable people who will “forgive/understand/enable” us.
Sadly too when a CG is finished using their nearest and dearest it is not unlikely that they will move on…….
The decision is yours Frankie but allowing him to walk all over you is unfair to you and unhelpful to him. He won’t thank you for it.
Over and out!Can a bird fly on one wing, Jay?
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I tried it and crashed many times.Hi Camarami,
Sorry to read that you find yourself in this position with a year’s earnings wiped out.
That’s what gambling does.
Wipes us out.
Unless you are prepared to stop NOW, you can reconcile yourself to having a lifetime’s earnings stolen by this dreaded disease. It progresses unless we stop in our tracks and change our behaviour.
Money is not the only thing gambling takes.
It also steals our time, relationships, self worth, pride, and even our motivation to quit.
Read the advice Kathryn has given you and follow it before it’s too late.
Best wishes for a new recovery.
You can do it. This is your chance.Work overload causes stress, Kin.
Stress from unplanned and numerous changes (i.e. in your work situation) leads to anxiety. Anxiety can lead to gambling.
Well done on taking the right approach by speaking to Management instead of setting unrealistic expectations.You won’t regret making this move.
If the relationship is meant to last, this could be just what he needs to bring him to his senses . An active CG is impossible to live with. The confusion and chaos they create is , as you say, HELL!
I know this because I am a CG.
The “love”you felt has turned to fear, which is the direct opposite of love.
Give him time to chill. He is bullying you and that will have a bad effect on your 3 year old child.
Don’t worry. CGs are survivors.
This might be the exact treatment he needs to get him to turn his life around.
Next step is LOOK AFTER YOURSELF.
Stay strong and stay close to this site. Lots of help/support available.
Gambling is not about money, although money is the thing that highlights the problem.Hi kstep.
The first post is probably the most difficult to make so well done and welcome to GT. You will get lots of replies in the coming days. I just spotted your post as I was closing down for the night (3.30 hrs)
Use the Helpline, The Closed and Open Groups and follow the advice. It took me about 8 years ducking and diving on this site before I called a halt to the madness and I’m double your age.
Maybe we will meet in a Group during the week. In the meantime , stay close to GT, Lots of help/advice /support available.
God bless!Keep going Darren!
Won’t be long ’til you will be soaking up the sun in Grand Canaria.
I’m not into sun holidays so much, but I looked at a car I would love last week . I did a quick recky and it hit me hard that I could have bought 7 of those cars for all the money I lost gambling. Hit me so hard I went through the motions with the sales team and applied for the finance. Three days later I was told it was declined. That’s what gambling takes from us. Despite the fact that its well over 500 days since my last bet, the gambling demon is still coming back to haunt me….time for the Serenity Prayer.
Sorry for off loading on your thread but you did say you were open to sharing.
Anyway I hope you’re doing well and staying G free odaat.Hello Kin,
I’m glad you are aware of the things that lead you astray and that you know the way to avoid danger.
Awareness is the key. I hope your health improves and your mom’s situation and that you get the salary that is owing to you.
Great to see you posting.