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keep focussed Bryan!
You are not alone!
Gambling sucks!The box set of The Sopranos replaced gambling for me , for a while , Libbie. I treated myself to it and got hooked. The only time I would watch it was with hubby and son. I never watch TV or DVDs alone. I very seldom watch TV. I suppose I was too busy "watching" slot machines…The Sopranos sure provides a buzz….my daughter bought me Mad Men. I watch it occasionally, but Im not hooked on it. I would love to see Downton Abbey. When winter sets in , I will get the set.
About my retirement thoughts, Libbie. I have given over 8 years to this job. The workload is increasing. The hours are increasing. The annual leave is being reduced. My boss is leaving . My health is below par. I’m getting old!. These would be my reasons for leaving. When I get some sleep, I will post my reasons for staying….
I won’t make any hasty decisions, but a Cat said, God shows us when the time is right. I believe that. There are ways we learn how to "read the sign of the *****" . It comes with life’s experience.
Gambling has cost me sooo much. I have worked for nothing for the past 8 years. It all went on debt repayment and I still owe over 40 grand!
I will think about that tomorrow!
It’s 1 am now!
Don’t bother travelling that distance to gamble Libbe. Think of that lonely drive home!$1200 is hard earned, I won!
Why give it to the "fatcats"? Easy money for them!
I used to justify my actions by saying things like "it could have been worse" or "some people take vacations, I gamble", but every time we justify our actions we are fooling ourselves and sooner or later things will spiral out of control and we will say "things couldn’t be much worse" or "I can’t afford to either gamble or take vacations!"
Don’t wait until you are at rock bottom, I won. ***** what you have achieved by not gambling A new car, money saved, peace of mind, self respect and above all your sanity.
Gambling robs us of all those things.
When we gamble, or time and our money are never our own.
I keep reminding myself that gambling is NOT about relaxing and having fun . It’s about giving our hard earned cash to some greedy stranger who is laughing all the way to the bank.
Change your thinking and your habits will change.
ODAAT!Hope you got through the Bank Holiday weekend ok, R2C!
Well done on getting that contract.
I hope you’ re busy setting up for that and not doing anything foolish…5 days since you posted!!
I have an important meeting with 2 union guys tomorrow, Pray, please that it turns out ok. We need some sort of miracle to resolve a difficult situation at work…odaat!
God bless!Its almost tomorrow….thought of gambling after a meeting today Had a few hours to kill. Changed my mind very quickly so August is still a G free month for me…odaat
It can be done, Luna, but not all at once and not alone!
Don’t take on too much. You are wounded and still in shock. Time heals our hurts.
One day at a time is the only way!
Never give up!Well done Bryan. It takes a long long time to reduce debt but every time we gamble we add to that debt and frustrate ourselves more and more.
Stay focussed!
I’m hanging in this month!
Do or die!Losing your boyfriend (and other friends)will definitely drive you back to the casino to fill the void. Lonliness and loss are common factors in gambling, I think.
Having no available venue is a bonus! In Ireland the self-exclusion is only a verbal arrangement. Unless the staff know you. you can easily go in and play (THROW MONEY AWAY). I’m banned from lots of places but every town in Ireland has at least one den of eniquity and of course as soon as a CG enters that town, a casino draws us like a magnet, like a spider attracts a fly to a web.
Try to find a few new friends Libbie.
Having company when you out is a deterrent.
Still no sign of Mythea!
Sometimes we get too stressed about not gambling, Cat. The more thought we give to it the more attached we become to the memory and in a way gambling still rules our lives. "Dropping our attachments" is the way to be free. When I cling to gambling thoughts it still controls me. When I see it for what it is, (an illusion) and become aware of its’reality and consequences, I feel I am just dropping it , in the same way I would drop a cooking pot if I caught it by the hot handle.
I’m trying to forget all my gambling experiences, good and bad and just glance at the consequences. I have managed to instal new sofware in my brain (for today). "Gambling ruins lives" and "CGs can’t play slot machines". I’m not giving "urges" a second thought!
Gambling no longer rules my life!I haven’t gambled once this month, so I hope I can say the same on August 31st!
Thanks Cat!I was wondering where you were Sherry!
I was wondering where I was…
I always get anxious when you go off the radar Sherry. In a way I feel more secure when you are around. I can visualise you in your ***** and span new home locking out the dogs. ( Don’t forget to lock out the Fatcats too!) Put that cash in the frezzer, Sherry. Wrap it in a towel. You gave me that hint a long time ago!
Where were we?
All I know is where I AM, today!
I am NOT in a casino. The day is young. I missed my usual trip to Dublin for early Mass. I will go to a different church for one pm, then I will come home and my son and hubby will be home from Dublin by then, and we will **** and eat and chat and maybe go for a walk , if I can muster up the physical energy and the mental energy to get some one to go with me…
Going out alone is dangerous right now. Im leaving my ATM card here under my mattress when I go to Mass in case I am tempted to do a detour..
one day at a timeI notice you did not start an August Thread , Cat!
Any particular reason why?I hear you Luna!
I could have written every word of that post. One hundred ***** over!
At Easter, I was really desperate for money. Like you I made a "final,one last ditch attempt" to retrieve even a fraction of my then recent (huge) losses. I struggled for hours upon hours. I was down to my last few euro, when suddenly I hit a jackpot. The chinese girl who works in that little den of eniquity they call a casino, must have been sizing me up for hours because when I checked out she said "go now or you lose!" I wanted to prove her wrong by trying another few "spins"….Ten hours later I reeled out into the car park, penniless, shocked and sick. "Where was my money?" It was really a wake up call for me, Luna. The money I so badly needed to cover previous losses had evaporated before my eyes. I had gone into a trance and COULD NOT STOP GAMBLING!
I was shocked to learn that day/night, that my need to gamble was far greater than my need for the money I so badly needed and was "lucky" to get.
GCs never win, Luna!Sorry to hear you are being haunted by your past right now, Debbie. I would consider that to be a normal part of healing. The scars remain even after the wound closes. Ideally, we can say nobody has the power to hurt us unless we give them that power but sometimes , in weak and vulnerable moments, we do find our defences weakened and the "enemy" takes the upper hand. Just give it time, Debbie. That sister of your ex is either goading you or passing on messages from her brother to hurt you. I woould suggest you call her bluff and ask her why she tells you all this rot. Tell her you don’t want to hear it….(or do you?)
Whatever, gambling is not the cure.
Don’t be angry for having urges. Maybe you are still punishing youself deep down for staying with that guy and remembering the coping macanism you used then…
You don’t need that crutch now Debbie.
You are safe.
You are free!
You are healing, odaat!Don’t look for what is lacking, Luna. Look at what is allowing you to gamble!
Money?
Free time?
Opportunity?
Remove those things and the house of cards will tumble. One day at a time.
The words I write to you, are also for myself!
Hiding behind a mask is both scary and lonely.I ve been there for years!
Bit by bit you can reveal the real you in this safe Haven of Hope. GT is an ideal place to be yourself.
Keep posting!