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Enjoy the celebrations, FG
Yes, he did turn up. Stayed one night and vanished again, as they do!Sorry to hear you had surgery, Izzi. I hope it wasn’t too serious . I wish you a full and speedy recovery.
Gambling , on the other hand does not come with a speedy recovery. If you stay away though your recovery will be FULL. One day at a time. I reckon you must be about 9 months free now ? Why blow it?
Take it easy!Welcome back FG
Looking forward to keeping in touch through the groups and on this and other threads.
One day at a time!Sometimes it’s good to spend time alone Lizbeth. I guess we are all alone in this life. Being surrounded by lots of people doesn’t always fill the void. I think a lot of CG used the casino to surround ourselves with a crowd. Yet every CG was alone. A casino is a very lonely place to be. Almost as lonely as the awful journey home. I don’t know if I’m making sense. I like my own company but would not look forward to having nobody to call on me in my old age.
Your mom is lucky to have so many people in her life. Maybe she doesn’t know quite how lucky she is. Did she start her cardiac rehab yet?
That’s an awful memory about your cousin.Is there any way you can confront him with a third party present and get him to apologize for what he did to you? It would help to put the past behind you. Your mother probably denies it as a way of coping. Or maybe she genuinely does forget. Try not to dwell on it Lizbeth. Remember the good times!Well done on seeking help, navigating the Site and finding the chat group, Dan.
One day at a time, without handing money is the safest way to get trough the early days.
Everything in your life will improve when you stop gambling. Not immediately but you will see gradual changes.
Lots of help here but no magic wands!
You have hit the ground running, just in time for a G free July!Don’t try to figure out a CG’s behaviour Michelle or you WILL be confused. We can bamboozle even the most clever and alert people when we want to gamble !
The best think you can do is build a wall around yourself and your child and keep your CG outside.
When he sorts himself out, things might be different but for now you need to protect yourself from his behaviour.Patience,staying calm and thinking thinks through got us to dry land Micky.
Only one day left in June.
No stopping us now. We have the compass set for the next trip.
Stay focused .As a CG, Michelle, it seems to me that your guy is breaking lots of rules AND getting away with it!
Don’t underestimate how much your child id absorbing throughout all this unhealthy interaction . Although you sound like a very caring mum, she seems to be caught up in the middle a lot of the time . Reading through the eyes of a CG it seems he vanishes when he wants to gamble. Makes a guest appearance when his luck is in. Pays some money (maybe to relieve his guilt) then has a free reign to do an “action replay”and all at the emotional expense of you and your child.
Maybe you should consider setting up legal boundaries? It will make him aware of his rights and duties and may keep him more accountable. On the other hand it might highlight the true nature of his gambling problem and let him see when he is breaching the Law. To be honest , I think he is having an easy time playing you like a fiddle . A dose of Tough Love would not go astray on him. NOT a judgement, Michelle. Just an observation!Glad that doc gave you a listening ear, Micky.
Maddening when you feel you’re talking to the wall.
Is CNWL residential?
I think Maverick is going there too, didn’t he say?
(Where are you Mav, if you are reading?)Amen to that, Kin
It is hard to see Our Loved Ones suffer
God loves them too“In a minute” was the answer I got when mine were younger and I would ask them for help…the minute would never come. I would ask and ASK, then tell them, then start roaring at them and eventually they would do a certain amount, with bad grace, leaving me feeling guilty for nagging and yelling. Their bedrooms were always like junk yards. It used to break my heart to go in there and see CDs, ipods, CD players video games etc ect etc ( not to mention designer clothes ) littered around the floor. Radios broken and the batteries drained because they “forgot” to turn off devices.
Two things come to mind. Our kids got FAR too much, too easily.
In a few years time they will all be gone…..
When they move out , will the clutter still be there? I have an attic full of clutter . Symbolic of all the clutter in my head?
Could you PLEAD with them to help Liberty? They are girls!!! When my daughter comes from Australia (which is seldom), she starts emptying presses and cleaning out the fridge, saying “when was this place last given a good cleaning”!!
It’s a bit like gambling.
You can’t win!
(but you are allowed to rant and even allowed to YELL!Awareness helps us to control our choices Micky.
“What you are aware of you are in control of; what you are not aware of is in control of you”Only 2 eggs today. Can’t control the output there!
June has been a good monthThanks for posting to my thread Micky. I thought you were mad with me.
No gambling . No alcohol but LOTS of SWEETS.I love your posts, Kin
I am looking forwarding to reading that SJ. I never got my head around the 12 Steps but I do know and like “Mindfulness”