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You really do have a wonderful ability to rise above situations, Lizbeth. When I read your posts, I always feel your husband is watching over you.
I think your grandson and daughters are very blessed to have you in their lives. I’m sure you will be able to explain to the boy that his dad didn’t mean what he said about taking him away. That man needs help. He sounds very hurt.
Gambling would destroy not only you, Liz, but also your family.
Sit tight!I read on Kathryn’s Thread, FG, where you said the excitement of gambling seems to override the reality and how you would live in a casino if there were no down sides to gambling.
I feel exactly the same, FG. Gambling was my First Love but when it sucks the very soul out of you , not to mention the money, the relationships, health etc etc etc, we have to kiss it goodbye and NEVER go back to the Hell that gambling becomes when we cross the line of no return.
I met a woman one night in a casino a few years ago ( I met hundreds actually but I remember this one especially). Glamorous, but looked sad. In her 50s. Playing on small bets. We got chatting and she told me she had nothing to live for. Her husband had given her so many “second chances” that she thought he would never carry out his threat to “pack his bags”if she didn’t stop gambling . Long story short, she told me she arrived home in the early hours a few years later and the house was silent. He was GONE…..then her phone rang and I noticed she became irritable and snappy. She said “that’s my son trying to control me now…”!!!!!!
Very sad to witness such a legacy first hand. I’m sure it happens far more often than most CGs care to admit.
We were lucky we got out in time, FG.
The feelings (highs) were great when we were on a roll but let us never forget the hangover and the high price we paid and could still pay for what we thought was fun.
Well done on turning your life around.Just turned on the laptop and saw your post on my thread. Thanks Cat!
The 12th is the day money goes from my Current Account to an online Savings Account that I started in June. It is my latest Plan to restore some of my Retirement Fund which I very foolishly depleted in a few foul swoops when I got the brainwave to try Online Gambling in March 2015 . My Account went from a healthy 5 figure sum to zero in about ten days/nights. I nearly had a nervous breakdown and a heart attack all in one go. I would not wish the experience on my worst enemy. I kept checking my account online every hour for about a month to see if I had had a dreadful nightmare. Sadly, it was not a dream. It was reality. It was devastating. Some multi millionaire now has my Retirement Fund that was meant to last me for the rest of my life. The worst part is that my husband thinks my “stash” is safe. I will never tell him what happened. I can barely cope with it myself. Nobody except GT readers know. That’s why I am so intent on getting a sum of money together as fast as possible. I have two payments made. Twenty eight more to go. I can’t dwell on it or I would die with stress.
So learn from my stupid mistake, Cat and don’t ever dream of trying online gambling.
It will take me 30 months to restore my account to where it was in March of this year. I will just keep my head down until that happens . I also have huge debt repayments still. All due to gambling.
‘Nuff said for now Cat.
The moral of the story is, of course, that CGs NEVER WIN!!Maybe it’s because it’s July 31st and you were unconsciously rewarding yourself for being good for so long Micky? Reward? Flawed CG thinking, but that’s how it goes.
Tomorrow is a new new day, a new month and a new chance.
Don’t torture yourself. It’s only the end of the month, not the end of the world.
You’re doing great overall!
Ps one of our hens keeps flying over the fence. I have learned how to catch her and carry her back.Hope she’s not trying to get to the casino?!?!I’ve been reading back, Bettie and I noticed on this day (July 3oth) 2010, you were posting about being 30 days G free. Where did those 5 years go? It’s good to read back. It shows us how quickly life passes.
What were you doing differently, then?
It seems you were going to GA more, shopping with friends in thrift shops, posting here almost daily, getting lots of replies and even cutting friend’s hair ( Hope the scissors slipped, lol!!!)
It just proves, Bettie , that there is a life besides gambling.
You can do it!
So can I!I hope you are preparing well for your retirement, Cat. In Ireland they run courses for retirees. I think I told you that before. The nurses who worked with me for their whole career attended but in my case it wasn’t necessary. I had had a 19 year career break. A friend phoned me a couple of nights ago. I met up with her and a few others this time last year and we had lost contact since. She was just coming near retirement when we last spoke and like you, she had mixed feelings. Long story short, she told me she feels a great sense of relief now and like most people say, after they retire, it was only when she didn’t have to work any longer that she realised how much she had been pushing herself in the last few months. I felt the same. My health was going down because when I worked I gave it 100%. Compulsive to the finger tips! lol!
I look on my retirement as a holiday, Cat. I miss work and three or four staff keep in touch with me. One, on a daily basis would you believe ! She tells me all the nonsense that goes on and sometimes I feel I would love to be caught up in all the drama (it’s like a Carry On film at times) but it’s good to be able to stand back and say “Thank God I don’t have to face this stress anymore”. As we get older we can live on very little Cat. We have a garden with produce that would certainly keep us alive and healthy for years but of course I add the unhealthy foods which put nails in my coffin. One of these days, I will cut out ALL the junk and stick to the natural food. Having grandchildren keeps a person young. My sister is nine years older than me. She has lots of grandchildren She minds kids in her own home (still) for cash and always has some of the grand babies at weekends. Superwoman! Personally, I think she’s daft but it keeps her fit.
You will be a doting granny to your G children Cat and as you spend more time with them, you will ask yourself why you didn’t retire sooner!Welcome home, Charles!
Hope you packed some sunshine in your case.
The weather has been atrocious here.5 eggs today Mickey
A first!
Up to now, 4 was the most.
A jackpot!‘Delighted to hear your claim was settled,Jenna. (I thought your original quote was very little considering your injuries)
Two major events are taking place in your life. Moving from home and securing your finances.
Both can be triggers for gambling.
Maybe now is the time to come clean with your “chap”?
Secrecy doesn’t help relationships to stay healthy.You deserve all the support Mickey
You’re doing great
How is your son’s arm?
(3 eggs so far today!!)I hear you Angie!
Low moods seem to be part and parcel of this dreaded Gambling Fiasco.
We can’t remove that mountain but we can take actions to reduce it’s size . I know when I look at the strides I have made in debt repayment over the past ten years, it gives me hope for the future.
If I dwell on the size of that debt(mountain) plus all the other Damage, I have done I would be totally overwhelmed.
Today, I’m going to follow Maverick’s suggestion and set out 5 (very) simple achievable tasks.All of the above can play havoc with our moods, Maverick.
Just sit tight.
Can you call one of your NA/GA buddies for a chat?
Seeing the consequences of my actions always made me feel like running to the “comfort zone”.
Only problem is when we drag ourselves back from Hades the thing that drove us there will still be waiting.
Deep breaths Mav!
Better days ahead!Good to see a post from you Mav. You’ve been on my mind this weekend. We had a friend here visiting yesterday. He reminds me of how I visualize you. ( I always conjure up mental images of people) . His wife left him. He shared the whole story. He was stunned. Sat there for hours sucking his e cig. I fed him well.
Well done on your G free year, Kirty. You haven’t wasted a minute.
Your garden sounds like a lovely place to spend time relaxing while you reap what you sowed (literally and figuratively).
Thanks for taking the time to give us an update. It is very inspiring to know that Life without gambling is such a better place.
Well done!Lizbeth, I really admire you for getting to the root of your spending. Having money gives us power. Sometimes we abuse that power by using money to control people in our lives. I have done that in the past and have seen others do it too.
I think gambling has a lot to do with control. Ironically the final outcome is lack of control.
You show a lot of insight and self awareness. I think we all need to discipline ourselves more. These days we all have far too much. I remember my mother coming home from shopping when we were kids and telling me she walked past the ice cream counter in Woolworth’s 3 times saying “will I, wont I?” before finally deciding she could not justify spending 3pence on the cone she was longing for. That generation knew the meaning of discipline and self control.
I could take a leaf from her book.
Maybe you can put the repayments on the loans you gave, directly into a Savings account without handling cash Lizbeth. We all know where that cash could end up.
Well done on your soul search. Thanks for sharing!