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You have come a long way, Micky.
Focusing on the positive benefits of not gambling is one of the keys to recovery.
Exercise is essential-
(says I, while sitting by the blazing stove, watching the Budget Report on TV to see if I can claw back anything. I think I’ll go for a walk)
Thanks for motivating me, Micky.Always great to hear from you Kathryn.
Yes, I am “progressing”, thanks. I had a few expensive skirmishes with slot machines this year, but I feel I’m coming to “burnout” stage now. I’m worn out from gambling.
Thank God you have not resorted to that futile exercise to alleviate your present unhappiness. That is a blessing, for sure. Not only would it complicate your situation, but it would also cause you to bury your whole body, not only your head, in the sand!
No problem is too great to overcome, Kathryn. Can you seek counselling? Legal advise? Spiritual guidance?
I’m also a “head -in-the-sand” type but we both know where denial leads. Nowhere!
I hate to think of you feeling scared.
Get help Kathryn. You deserve it.
How is your darling mum?
I think of you often.
VGood to see you posting here, Micky.
Yes, Gambling is only part of us.
When we choose not to allow it to become ALL of us!
That’s what happens to me, for one.
All or nothing.
The “small part” magnifies until it overwhelms me.
Take’s my “take”!They say Honesty is one of the keys to recovery Steph
Personally, the best I could do on that score was to be honest with myself. I told my husband as much as he could bear to take in. I think its unfair to burden people unnecessarily.
The problem with lying is, it becomes a habit and we need a good memory.
This is not the time to crucify yourself Steph. The money is gone. It won’t be coming back.
Can you protect the other two thirds of your salary?
You might not be able to account for that amount so easily.
No real self exclusion where I live either. Just word of mouth, but banning from a venue where you are well known means you lose face when you go back.
I don’t like losing face.
Or money, of course.
When is your hubby coming home?
Can you chain yourself up until he arrives?Did you plan it in advance Steph?
Just wondering because I usually do. I have to cover my tracks and set an escape route.
Or did you just go into a casino casually?
It took me years to get the Self Exclusion idea through my head I banned from my comfort zones and never went back.
I did manage to find other “hellholes” though and donated large sums to them.
Crazy, isn’t it?
Will you have to tell hubby you gambled?Very sorry to hear that Steph
That’s what CGs do with money
Unfortunately
I have done it so often. It is MADDENING. We haunt ourselves reliving the scene , asking “Why, why why” And when we are finished, we say “if only, if only”!
It’s one HELL of a habit Steph.
The only way to stop is to have no access to cash.
By the way, how did you get your hands on seven hundred dollars?
Lot of money for a gambler to carry!That name is going around in my head since you mentioned it, Lizbeth
I even googled it!
What would you need it for in the town? Seems like a “country” vehicle.
Glad you got a buyer for it.
You sure don’t hang around!
No procrastinating for you.
Is your grandson coming next weekend?
Will that be Thanksgiving where you live?Threatening to take your phone may be his way of cutting off your link with friends and family,Caroline
In other words, bullying!
Hide or immobilize your phone so that he can’t take it.
He might be planning to sell it.
Do NOT give him money.
Change it for food vouchers when you still have the chance.
It is “family” money. Not “gambling” money.
Keep a step ahead.Gambling takes too much from us FG.
It has taken our money.
Freely given by you and me. We lined millionaires’ pockets. They must be really laughing all the way to the bank. I’m sure, when they see us arriving, they rub their hands together in glee.
WE WILL NEVER GET THATMONEY BACK.
You still have your family, FG.
You still have your health.
Please do not give them your most precious possessions.
Life is too short to waste time.
Well done on 7 G free days.Hope you had a lovely day out with your friend, Caroline.
You deserve a break from the house.
As for the items being emptied from the cupboard, he is most likely searching to see if you have hidden the cash. My advice is to leave them where he put them. Don’t pick them up. It’s his way of demeaning you. Keep out of any discussions about money or educational plans he says he has set up for the children. It is HIGHLY unlikely that an active CG would set up an account for anything. All we need is a stash of cash and when that runs out we need to know who will be the easiest target to supply more. Words mean very little at this point. Just tell him you will not be responding when he uses abusive terms. Don’t be afraid to tell the children “daddy is being mean to me because I won’t give him money” . CGs like a smoke screen. Be blunt, but as respectful as you can.
Not all CGs behave in this manner. His behaviour is totally unacceptable by any standard. No excuses! I heard a CG sharing at a GA meeting how he shook his two year old baby because he was frustrated he couldn’t have a bet. I was livid. If I was a man he would have felt a heavy hand on the back of his neck. He should have been asked to leave but nobody reacted . I cannot understand why not but they put it down to being non judgemental. I would draw the line when it comes to abuse. Nobody was impressed. All the other men lowered their eyes. A bully will use every excuse to get his own way. Leave the room when he starts and ask him not to embarrass himself !
You seem like a wonderful mother and a gentle lady. Protect yourself Caroline. Nobody deserves abuse!Caroline, would you consider changing whatever cash you have int Gift Vouchers? Lots of shops issue these, instead of cash. You can use them for food and household needs.
Your CG will nag you for cash.
He will be less interested in “vouchers”!
Just say “I have NO cash, only food vouchers”!
That will throw him off!
Just a little “CG” tip!!!
Sshh!!High up on the list is progress, Micky. Just sit tight!
Glad you had your MRI scan done. Lets hope the result will be clear.
Lots of things are outside our control.
Try the odaat time method while waiting for you appointment with NPGC.
Maybe use this site more, while you are waitingGambling won’t solve our loneliness, Lizbeth . Why not surprise your mom by dropping back and inviting her to the cinema? That way you can be silent in each other’s company. Often when we go the extra mile the person we reach out to will feel humbled by our action. Action speaks louder than words!
Was that you I saw peeping around the door on Bonker’s Thread, Geordie?
Where were you?Very inspiring post Kin.
So true. Without roots , a tree withers.
Praying for your mum’s recovery. She seems like a strong lady. You are a very respectful son. The Bible says “Honour your father and your mother” Not many “children”keep to that commandment. Mine certainly don’t. Except when it suits them.