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love your poem, Charles.
love your poem, Charles.
At the core of all deception
Lies a lack of self reflection
On our attitudes, behaviours and beliefs.
False interpretation and irrational correlation
Lead to lies, illusions, notions and deceit.
‘Til you overcome this practice
And pursue alternate tactics
Such as openness, awareness and clear truth
You will need to seek contrition
Accept change and opposition
To a lifestyle you decided to create
When you chose then, to continue
The deceit that lay within you
And resigned to attribute it to “fate”.
Call it lies, untruth or rumour
We know that we just humour
Our illusions when we try to fabricate.
But before we try to figure ways to stop this growing bigger
Let’s be honest with each other and ourselves
Even though the truth may hurt us-(lies will make our lives seem worthless)
Let’s get ready for self searching and deep delves!At the core of all deception
Lies a lack of self reflection
On our attitudes, behaviours and beliefs.
False interpretation and irrational correlation
Lead to lies, illusions, notions and deceit.
‘Til you overcome this practice
And pursue alternate tactics
Such as openness, awareness and clear truth
You will need to seek contrition
Accept change and opposition
To a lifestyle you decided to create
When you chose then, to continue
The deceit that lay within you
And resigned to attribute it to “fate”.
Call it lies, untruth or rumour
We know that we just humour
Our illusions when we try to fabricate.
But before we try to figure ways to stop this growing bigger
Let’s be honest with each other and ourselves
Even though the truth may hurt us-(lies will make our lives seem worthless)
Let’s get ready for self searching and deep delves!Hello Brownie and welcome to GT.
I am a Compulsive Gambler.
If you and your husband are interested in establishing if he has a similar problem to mine and to most CGs, I would suggest looking at the Gamblers Anonymous 20 Questions .
It will be a guideline to set you on the track you may or may not need to pursue.
I know people who describe themselves as Professional Gamblers. They end up in similar circumstances to Compulsive Gamblers. Keep reading and posting.
You will find a lot of help here.Why would you regret “saying your piece”, Micky?
I know it can make us feel uneasy but it’s better than bottling it up in your mind. Can you send your workmate a text to say “no hard feelings” ? It might stop you dwelling on it.
Are you off for ten days? Any plans?Let him sit and gamble Caroline……
and first thing on Monday morning get legal assistance to get as much as possible transferred to your name i.e welfare benefits, etc.
NOTHING that you say or do will stop him gambling.
Only he can decide when he is ready to stop.I had a run in with an ATM too, Lizbeth. God’s ways are not ours! He was a step ahead of me. Glad yours is sorted. I’m still waiting (impatiently)
‘Hope you enjoy the craft fair. My sister in law is into that. Always trying new crafts. They say “the devil finds work for idle hands” . Gambling kept my hands busy.
I heard a sermon on “Joy” not so long ago. The reason we can’t find it. the priest said, is because we search in the wrong places. So very true. I know where my source of Joy lies but my fallen nature often sets me on the wrong path.
We need to use our gift of discernment to get on the Right Track. Keep searching!Dwelling on “slips” will drive us nuts, Mike.
Writing them off , on the other hand tends to allow us to minimize their seriousness.
I often do that . “Well, it was only a couple of hundred” or whatever.
I now try to tell myself “Gambling is gambling and every time I partake, it leads me into deeper debt, weakens my resolve and makes it easier to justify losses”!
Very well done on your 9 clean days.I love what you posted about gambling on Izzi’s thread, Fritz. It says it all .
They say Knowledge is Power. Most CGs I know have a vast knowledge of how Gambling alludes, enthralls and finally leaves us bereft of all dignity. Yet we carry on creating greater illusions every time we “try our luck”. As Alan Carr says we need to reach a point where we see gambling for what it is and shatter the mirage that has engulfed us for so long.Can you attend an AA and NA Group, Fritz?
It’s scary facing withdrawal alone especially as it affects sleep. It seems NOT withdrawing is affecting both your sleep and work right now. You need professional help from all accounts.
Well done on not gambling. Physical withdrawal needs to be monitored, I would think.Good luck with the NPCG appointment today, Micky.
You’re right, Worried Mama.
CGs learn to play people like a fiddle, but only those who skip to our tune!Jenny, I know that nobody can tell you how to conduct your recovery, but I really feel you are giving your husband a lot of power over you. As you say yourself, you are wasting energy wanting things to get better.
Again, I would suggest they you might consider taking a six month break from each other. He is playing games with your mind. Phoning last thing at night and first thing in the morning to talk about current affairs seems like a game to me. And my guess is that text about taking the kids out was intended for you, not his GA friend. CGs thrive on chaos. You need peace of mind. You won’t get it by skipping to his tune. Back off would be my suggestion but of course the F and F advice supercedes mine. I’m only coming at this from a very personal angle. I can see that you are being tested to the limit. When I’m gambling I change plans often to throw “suspects” off! He seems to be setting traps. You seem to be walking straight into them. Why would you call to his place or even discuss his concerns when he is blatantly lying?
Have you considered family counselling?(((Lizbeth))
I felt as if somebody punched me in the gut when I read your post .
I could have been me making that post tonight (but I haven’t got 500 only 200)
It almost was me, actually.
I had a visit from my son and his GF today They have to be collected and driven back to the city. My husband collected them this morning. She turned up her nose at the food I prepared for lunch. This evening refused to eat anything. Kept “eyeing”my son and muttering under her breath. I feel very sorry for her. She didn’t have an easy life but she contradicted everything I said and tried to come between me and my son . It sounds weird I can’t go into details but any mother will know what I mean He seemed very stressed. Then, all of a sudden he said can we go now…..Long story short, I decided “what the hell, I’m going to drop into the casino for an hour after I drop them off” Then I decided to let my husband drive them . I stayed at home. He is just back now. I’m annoyed with him too. He just keeps his mouth shut and leaves the talking to me when she is here.
GAMBLING WON’T SOLVE ANY OF OUR PROBLEMS, Lizbeth.
I hope you can recover from the financial loss. I know if I lost money tonight it would have set me back big time. I’m on a tight budget. The emotional/physical recovery would take even longer.
Will you tell any of your family that you gambled?
If I gambled and lost I certainly would be looking for a bail out. I’m up to my neck in loan repayments.
Well done on posting.
I think I would have closed my thread and disappeared . Can’t take any more.