Forum Replies Created
-
Posts
-
There will always be temptations Jrb but we will have the means to resist them if we take the effort to set up barriers. Personally, I made little or no effort in the past. The thought of gambling would be enough to set the wheels in motion , literally and metaphorically. I would be “off like a shot”,
These days, I think things through.
Good to see you in the Group last night.
Same again this evening. ‘Hope we can both report a G free day.
Yes, I agree , it does get easier when we distance ourselves from the “action”.
Losing a night’s sleep as well as losing your bottom dollar can/will become a thing of the past, given time.
Stay focused.Strangely, FG , those fake slots pay out SOOO badly, it would turn you off for life. You need to deposit, like 3k Playing on high bets that disappears fast I topped up at least twenty times Who would have that kind of “Real money”? Well, unless you mortgaged or sold your house (God forbid!) Then after all those deposit I got a few HUGE wins. By that time I was bored , nauseated and highly suspicious. NO, Free slots are not my poison, but they could be set up as a mouse trap to lure the unsuspecting so I’m glad I have them blocked. Missed you in the Group this evening. Maybe tomorrow!
If I told you I had gambling urges what would you say Lizbeth?
Take away ALL access to money Liz. Wrap those cards in tissues and put them in the freezer or post them to yourself!
I’ll give you a tip. GO TO GA. I went twice. Me and 15 men. All in a circle. I love studying faces. I imprint an image of the most interesting ones on my mind. Some are wracked with pain. Some look bewildered and anxious. Some just look stunned.
If I feel like gambling, I will imagine what my face will look like and then I will change my mind….Try GA Liz. Imagine 15 men all to yourself for 90 mins…….LOL. If I met them in the casino I wouldn’t see their faces , only the side of their heads!I know what it feels to be numb Jenny!
It is delayed shock. You will have to speak to somebody. Maybe come clean to your boyfriend and ask him to give you an hour of his time to discuss something that is making you very happy. If he really loves you , it will be the best thing you ever did. If he doesn’t or can’t hack it, well, it will still be the best thing you ever did.
It is very unfair to him to keep him in the dark I’m sure he is really worried about you.
If you think there is “only one way to end this” you are wrong Jenny.
Temporary problems DO have solutions. Suicide leaves a terrible legacy for loved ones.
Ring the Samaritans if you feel low or go to your mum and stay there while your BF is away.
I know how it feels to lose big money Jenny . Last March I was wiped out. It thought I was going to die from crying. I was a mental and physical wreck.
Time heals. God is good. Don’t give up. You have a better life ahead.Yes, I agree with Nomore, Jenny.
Blocking his calls and texts would solve some of your problems.
But maybe you still need his attention?
Just sayin!
Women are like that. We don’t like to be ignored or rejected and even negative contact is better than none. It sort of keeps us in the loop.
The time will come when things will move from your heart to your head Jenny. In the meantime, try not to allow him to tug on your heartstrings.
CGs (as I said before) know how to play vulnerable people like a fiddle.
If you do decide to block his texts let him know your decision.
Then he will learn to stop barking up the wrong tree.
Take control by setting boundaries. Don’t allow him to call all the shots.
“What’s in it for me”, is the question you need to ask yourself regarding your reaction to contact from him.
Breaking co dependent relationships is scary.
Some part of you needs his attention if my hunch is right.
If I’m off the track say so and I will delete this post. The last thing I want to do is upset or judge you. You have enough to deal with and you really are making great strides. Well done!
I have a deep respect for “F and F’s”,
‘Don’t know if I could hack it.
The less power he has over you, the easier it will be for you to get on with your life.
Take back that power little by little, Jenny. It works!So sorry to hear you have been unwell , Bonkers.
Rheumatoid arthritis is a tricky one. Keep your joints protected. Lots of advice and new medication available. Hope you find one that helps and that you will have long remissions. Green tea, ginger and turmeric are considered helpful but CHECK WITH YOUR GP.
Thank God you’re not gambling That would really put the top hat on everything.
Summer is coming so gentle walking in good weather will keep your spirits up Bonkers.
Thanks for the update.
By the way 60is the new 40!!!!!!Why not get in line with some of those “refugees” Geordie, and you’ll be fed like a king…
(Now that is below the belt, but I do believe charity begins at home.)
Don’t torture yourself G. Enjoy the few stray buns. And anything else that “falls off the tray”! When I was working I saw catering staff scrape unused food into the bin . In their stupidity they felt they had to keep the “health and safety” rules . Nurses on duty until half 8 would have given our eye teeth for a sausage/bacon sandwich at the 6pm tea break but some high handed law maker prevented that and insisted all unused food should be binned within ten minutes . Sinful waste, in my book! They don’t even give it for pig swill any more !! “Against EEC Rules” Such BULL!!!Sometimes we need to think outside the box Geordie.
When people put a rope around their neck (God forbid) in desperation all the “do gooders “come up with great notions.
Pity they don’t remember the parable of the Prodigal son in time!
You ‘ll be grand Geordie.
We will share a roast beef dinner in Dublin when the mayhem passes!Our behaviours can change Jrb.
Everyone here has been in the same terrible place that you find yourself in tonight.
The good news is
there is a way out!
One step at a time.
Join in one of the Support Groups or contact the Helpline tomorrow
Lots of people are either sleeping or working right now.
When we reach out for help we have taken the first step.
Keep posting
Things will improve when you change your behaviour In other words, when you quit gambling.
CGs have no other option.
Keep postponing your next bet!Awful, isn’t it Geordie!
The “rescuer” in me wants to send you money , food , clothes etc but all I can send is a few words.
Luckily, your immediate debts are all in two and three figures. You wont take too long to pay them off. Can you go to the Social Welfare for a food voucher? Ever hear of St Vincent de Paul? It’s a Charity. Google it. They give food parcels to needy people. I know pride will hold you back G. Nobody wants to be needy. Nobody wants to be a CG either but when we know the outcome , there really is no excuse.
Would your GP refer you to that Food Bank?
I knew someone who used go into a restaurant. Eat as much as possible, then complain loudly about the food and refuse to pay.
I think I’d rather eat grass than do that.
Can you get a loan anywhere?
Having even a few hundred would relieve your immediate plight and give you hope.
There always IS hope Geordie. And a light at the end of the tunnel. It’s just that you can’t see it
Y E T !
Well done on two weeks “recovery”, even though it doesn’t seem like it right now.
Stay in touch.Great news, indeed, FG. So absolutely delighted for your daughter And for you and your husband.
Selling a house is very stressful for all concerned.
Thank God the deal is done!Hope your grandson has a great birthday Lizbeth.
He is a much loved child!You’ve had a rough run, Geordie.
Life is not easy. There is only one thing worse than having no hope and that’s having false hope.
That’s what gambling gives us. False hope and when we confuse that with real hope we end up thinking we have NO hope. And it all ends up in one big muddle.
Hope is scary, Geordie because if we admit to having hope we have to shape up and face life.
Despair holds us back from hoping for better things.
Have you spoken to anyone about the feelings of despair?
You know that talking helps G.
Give it another shot.
You were missed here on GT.
Glad to see you back.In my opinion lending money to an active gambler can enable him/her to gamble more or maybe it will bring us to our senses. My husband often baled me out so did my son and daughter unknowingly. I know this is frowned on my The Powers That be but here is a greater Power Who sees everything.
Maybe he put you in this person’s life today to teach him and you the true meaning of Charity.
Good intentions will always be blessed.
Who knows where that person would end up if his immediate need wasn’t met.
I paid back every cent to my husband that he lent me.
I believe in restitution.
I also believe that “it is in giving that we receive”.
Passing on hope and love is a far greater gift but empty bellies don’t have much hope or love so feeding that person was your priority Kin.
Well done on seeing the wider picture.“Wanting badly to stop gambling” can become an obsession P. Try to do things that are totally unrelated to gamble. Try not to focus on the “shuddas, cuddas or maybes”. These things are outside your control. Nobody knows what the future holds.
Just record your thoughts and move on. It’s good to put those feelings on paper or in type.
When I stopped gambling in 2008 I walked miles.
I’m out of the habit of walking now but it “takes you out of your head” so try it. I need to start again too.
As Monique says , it’s NOW that matters.Every day is a new day Lizbeth. A new chance .Another bite at the proverbial.cherry.
I’m hell bent on getting my Lump Sum back that I threw away last March. Yesterday marked my 8th instalment. It’s in 4 figures now In twenty two more months it will be fully restored.
I’m also taking a mini legal challenge about an unrelated issue. It’s a bit of a gamble but if I don’t challenge this particular issue it will haunt me or God forbid, even drive me back to the wrong places. Better to face things head on. I have a few other issues that need addressment too. Weight, health, etc . I will draw up a hit list.
Apart from not spending on your Credit Card or gambling money, Lizbeth I would recommend that you set up a Savings Account if you haven’t already got one.Seeing savings build , no matter how small the amount , gives us great satisfaction and hope. Not just for the financial aspect but mainly to prove to ourselves that we are not slaves to materialism or consumerism and that we can replace destructive actions with constructive ones. I feel the benefit already. I truly believe we “cannot serve God and Money”. As CGs we made a god out of money. Discipline is another huge issue with me. I feel I need to tighten the reins so I hear you when you talk about overspending. t can so easily get out of control. Let’s face it when we get older our earning power is reduced so we need to “feather our nest”. I intend living a more frugal life. For many reasons, I feel it will benefit every CG to do that.
Sorry for hogging your thread Lizbeth. I’m on a roll!