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‘Hope the “cruel and inaccurate words” weren’t written by me?
Have I missed out on something?
Sometimes, people who are hurt deflect or project feelings in the wrong direction.
Nobody has the power to stop another member posting unless the Terms and Conditions of GT are breached. That’s my understanding of how the Site works.
I stand open to correction.
Surely a Recovery site should create unity not division.
We all have suffered enough pain through this addiction.I liked your poem, LLT but found it a bit scary!
Well done on reaching out for help.
Gambling can be a bit like drowning if we don’t jump onto the lifeboat before sinking under the waves.
Keep posting!How are things, Geordie?
Thinking of you . Give us an update when you get a chance.Just because you wanted to gamble, doesn’t mean you gambled, FG. Don’t punish yourself for wanting to go.
I understand how you felt after your birthday dinner and the opening your gifts. None of the parcels you unwrapped contained what you felt you really desired most. For a CG , I think there will always be “something missing”. I remember coming home from social events and feeling “All I need to ‘top off’ the occasion is a little gamble” . The ” icing on the cake” so to speak. A sort of restlessness would set in and in hindsight, every other part of the evening would seem boring.
I call this the “spoiled child syndrome”! Santa leaves every toy in his sack and yet he/she wants the toy he didn’t leave. It’s the fall out from The Garden of Eden , FG. Concupiscence! They wanted the one thing they couldn’t have. The Forbidden Fruit! I often crave that “fruit” too and I think this could be at the root of most addictions. Craving for things we have no right to. Desiring to eat what for a CG has become the “poisoned”fruit .
So FG, tough as it sounds you and I, m’darling will have to learn to live without our “buzz” and you can be thankful you have a husband who listens to your yearnings. When I quit in 2008, I devised all sorts of plans to replace my gambling and begged my husband to stand by me. He didn’t get it so all the plans flopped.
If I success, I did.
If I fail, I also did it.
Today, I must learn to stop “buzzing”!
Today I will not gamble!Haven’t seen any post from you this month P.
Everything ok?
‘Hope that stinkin thinkin changed to normal and that you got in touch with someone who “gets it”?Thanks for posting to my thread, Cathy. Good to hear from you.
The “F and F ” forum seems to be going through a lull lately. A few people I “look out for” seem to have stopped posting.
Yes, walking away from gambling is a tough, arduous journey. Especially when I look back at the carnage I leave behind.
Strangely, I always say “there is only one thing worse than being a CG………….” .
In my opinion, being married to, or having to live with a CG must be far worse because you never know when, through no fault of your own, and without warning, your world will spiral out of control and you will be launched into a spinning hell on earth with no idea when the end is coming.
At least the CG sees the” writing on the wall” beforehand and knows when the end is at hand. I always do, for one. Gambling takes a bit of preparation and plotting. This was always done secretly, in my head , which meant my S.O. had no warning. Of course an observant “partner” might be tuned in enough to see a change in behaviour as being a lead up to another gambling episode, but having to live on those tender hooks would be the worst thing I could imagine. Knowing that intervention in times of danger would be futile brings a helplessness that I would personally find difficult to bear.
The journey that leads me away from gambling is not half as scary or draining as the return journey would be, should I ever choose to travel that route again.
Walking from darkness to light is always easier than walking (or running) from light to darkness.
I am well aware of the misery that awaits me should I ever take that walk again. For that reason I will use my “bag of tools” just for today.
I’m sorry to hear you feel like a “bitter , small minded, bullying mother” for trying to help your son. Does he resent your support?
All any of us can do is protect ourselves.
Nobody can take a step for a CG. Hopefully, your son will reach out for help when the time is right for him .Hope you have a brilliant day on your birthday, FG. and that you enjoy your meal.
Better than sitting on the high stool watching reels spinning.
Hope you recovered from your stressful night at work.
Life is not a rose garden!CGs see borrowing as “easy money”
CGs see gambling as “easy money” too.
Just sayin’.Gambling gets the urge out of your system for a while Lizbeth. Looking back, is there anything you could have done to prevent that “slip”?
Glad to hear you’re choosing to use your new O/D for more important things than gambling Jrb.
I, like you have taken out lots of loans and o/ds to patch up damage, only to throw the “good money after bad”!
Time to wake up!GA is free, Jrb. So is AA.
Would you consider giving either or both another shot while you’re waiting?There is a lot to be said for a full fridge and paid bills, Seri.
We all need a bit of “hurdle” help from time to time.
It won’t be for ever. In ten years time you will look back on this period of your life with gratitude.
For now, just accept things are they are. I know CGs are impatient. We want to press “fast forward” to better times.
Thank God your dad was there for you or you could be writing a very different type of post.
Nothing in this life is perfect. Hang in there!CGs are not the best at “Balancing”, FG.
We do better at “juggling”! lol!
You are blessed to have that GP. He will continue the hypnosis for as long as you need it, so keep that bonfire smoldering and keep adding in the residue that needs to be disposed of.
‘See you in a Group soon.Well done Lizbeth
Every time we say NO it gets easier!Tears can turn to laughter, Jrb
Give it another shot
Missed you in the Groups