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HELLO YOUNG MAN. WHAT YOU ARE GOING THROUGH IS WHAT ALL GAMBLERS GO THROUGH. I AM A GAMBLER ON AND OFF FOR THE LAST 32 YEARS. I HAVE RECENTLY LOST A FORTUNE GAMBLING ONLINE. I WOULD LIKE TO SHARE A STORY WITH YOU THE FIRST TIME I WENT TO A BETTING SHOP I WAS LESS THAN 16 YEARS OLD. I ASKED A ELDERLY MAN IN THERE TO SHOW HE HOW TO DO A BET AND HE REFUSED. HE TOLD ME TO GET OUT OF THE SHOP AND NEVER COME BACK. HE TOLD ME THAT HE HAS LOST OVER 1 MILLION POUNDS. I LOOKED AT HIM AND THOUGHT THATS JUST NOT POSSIBLE FROM THE WAY HE DRESSED. THE MORAL OF THE STORY IS THAT HE DID NOT WANT ME TO GET IN THE SAME MESS AS HE WAS.
NOW 32 YEARS ON I AM PAYING THE PRICE FOR NOT LISTENING TO HIM.
IT SEEMS YOU ARE STILL A VERY YOUNG MAN WITH GREAT LIFE AHEAD OF YOU. YOUR SITUATION IS NOT AS BAD AS YOU THINK IT IS IF YOU WALK AWAY NOW.
THE BIGGEST PROBLEM WITH GAMBLING IS CHASING. WHEN I GO TO THE BETTING SHOP AT THE END OF THE DAY ALL PEOPLE WHAT TO DO IS WIN BACK WHAT THEY LOST ON THAT DAY.
SELF CONTROL IS THE MOST IMPORTANT THING IN GAMBLING AND SADLY AS CLEVER AND WISE AS WE THINK WE ARE WHEN IT COMES TO GAMBLING WE LOSE IT MEANING THAT ONCE WE REACH OUR TARGET WE CARRY ON AND WHEN WE LOSE WE LOSE EVERYTHING.
I REALLY HOPE YOU CAN GIVE UP NOW. ITS NOT ABOUT THE LEVEL OF STAKES, BE IT LARGE OR LITTLE EVENTUALLY YOU WILL GET TO A POINT THAT YOU ARE FORCED INTO BETTING LARGE INORDER TO RECOUP YOUR LOSSES.
PLEASE PLEASE GIVE UP NOW YOU HAVE A GREAT LIFE TO LOOK FORWARD TO.
GAMBLING EFFECTS YOUR DAY TO DAY LIFE IN A NEGATIVE WAY.Hello Bara
I have read the posts posted. I am a gambler on and off for the last 30 years. I am what you call a binge gambler. It is very hard for a gambler to let go of what they lost and the aim is each day i am more experienced and that i wont make that same mistake again. However in reality it just doesnt work. Unless he has self control which only 2 or 3 in a hundred do he will continue.
In reference to him opening a account under your name the money has to come out of your account unless he uses another method of payment which does not disclose who the receiptant is.
In reference to him self excluding he will have a copy of the agreement. If he has self excluded you can ask him for how long i believe the minimum is 3 months to a maximum of 5 years.( this applies in the UK other parts i am not sure) You can do a test on this by applying to a online company using his details if he has self excluded you wont be able to open a account.
I wish you all the best.Hello Rupture
I am glad you found my comments a touch useful.
Ouch i never knew you could gamble as much as £6K on slot machines. That is alot of money.
To be honest playing online is more devastating than the casino’s. In the casino’s there is lower limits and when you play on line the stakes that can be placed are much higher.
It is a blessing in disguise that aleast one of the gambling websites the account is blocked however to sadly the process to unblock the account is very simple and easy to do. Also to open another account is very easy with another website. The process is so simple.
It is very pleasing to hear that you have got a refferal to see a psychologist and not letting yourself go down with him however it should be him seeing the psychologist and not you.
In reference to what triggers me to gamble is mainly boredom, stress, problems with children or wife.
It’s a way out to release all the frustrations that you are going through.
The buzz when you are winning as higher than someone that takes class a drugs however the winning streak does not continue.
I am based in the UK and in London and you can find betting shops on every main road here. I have spent almost 32 years of my life in this rut. I am more like a binge gambler over the last 20 years however the stakes are very high.
I still remember the first time i walked into a betting shop i asked a eldely man how to write out a bet and he told he wont show me because he has lost over a million pounds. I looked at him and thought that was not possible from the way be dressed and looked. Little did i know at the time that he was doing me the biggest favour of my life. I have lost over a million pounds over the last 30 years.
Each time i go back whether it is to a betting shop or online i think i am much more clamer and smarter and in self control. When i see people in betting shops at the end of the day all they want to do is win back the money they came in with on the day.
Only a few if that have seld control when it comes to gambling.
There are filters out there to stop your boyfreind going on to gambling websites however if he really wants to he can use a freinds phone or a member of staffs phone to place bets.
He can self exclude for a maximum of 5 years via gamstop. The only problem with that not every online company is registered with them however he does not know that. I was told about 90% companies are registered as of yesterday.
I am quite similar to your other half in the sense when i am gambling and my wife or mum says something to me it goes in one ear and out the other ear.
Sadly my wife said to me years ago if you could sell me you would. I eally beleive i could have done that as gambling is a serious addiction and it requires proffesional treatment.
I am trying to speak to local solicictors to help me self exclude for life as it has been a very devastating ride for me. I have just put the wheels in motion and if i can i will do that. Otherwise i will do the maximum self exclusion which is for a period of 5 years.
I hope this helps and if there is anything else i can help you with let me know.
Please also take into consideration your age you guys are only 27. There is so much time to change your life. I have a freind who was a compulsive gambler in the sense he went to the betting shop daily and the day he had his first child he stopped going. That was almost 5 years ago.
I think you have been more than supportive to him.
I am sure if you spoke to your family members about this they will all tell you to leave him however there is something there that is keeping you still with him. It ois for you to decide what steps to take going forward.
Wshing you all the very best
I HAVE READ ALL THE POSTS HERE AND EVERYONE IS TELLING YOU THE SAME THING. DO NOT CHASE WHAT YOU LOST. IT IS VERY EVIDENT THAT YOU ARE A YOUNG AND NEW GAMBLER HOWEVER YOU ARE JUST LIKE THE REST OF US THAT HAS HAD YEARS OF EXPERIENCE. WE JUST DONT KNOW WHEN TO STOP. WE DO NOT HAVE THAT SELF CONTROL.
WIPE YOU DEBTS AND TAKE THIS AS A EXPERIENCE AND NEVER DO IT AGAIN OTHERWISE NEXT TIME YOU WILL BE IN A BIGGER DEBT WHICH WILL ALSO INFLUENCE YOUR EDUCATION
I HOPE THIS HELPSI HAVE READ ALL THE POSTS HERE AND EVERYONE IS TELLING YOU THE SAME THING. DO NOT CHASE WHAT YOU LOST. IT IS VERY EVIDENT THAT YOU ARE A YOUNG AND NEW GAMBLER HOWEVER YOU ARE JUST LIKE THE REST OF US THAT HAS HAD YEARS OF EXPERIENCE. WE JUST DONT KNOW WHEN TO STOP. WE DO NOT HAVE THAT SELF CONTROL.
WIPE YOU DEBTS AND TAKE THIS AS A EXPERIENCE AND NEVER DO IT AGAIN OTHERWISE NEXT TIME YOU WILL BE IN A BIGGER DEBT WHICH WILL ALSO INFLUENCE YOUR EDUCATION
I HOPE THIS HELPSPLEASE DO NOT LOSE HOPE AS I BELIEVE YOUR BOYFRIEND’S CASE IS NOT AS BAD AS OTHERS. HOW MUCH DOES HE GAMBLE AND WHEN HE TAKES MONEY FROM YOU WHAT SORTS OF AMOUNTS DOES HE TAKE?
I HAVE JOINED THE FORUMS AND I FIND THAT IT HELPS ALOT.HELLO RUPTURE. I AM GAMBLER AND I CAN TELL YOU THAT GAMBLING IS A DISEASE IT IS WORSE THAN DRUGS. I AM EXACTLY LIKE YOUR OTHER HALF I GO THROUGH PERIODS SOMETIMES AS LONG AS 5 YEARS WITHOUT HAVING A BET. THAN WHEN I START I MAKE UP FOR THAT IN 1 DAY. WHAT I HAVE DONE OVER THE LAST FEW DAYS IS TRANSFER ALL MY FUNDS TO MY MOTHERS ACCOUNT. THIS WAY I WONT GAMBLE. IN YOUR OTHER HALFS CASE HE IS ADDICTED TO SLOT MACHINES WHICH ARE NOT AS BAD AS OTHER FORMS OF GAMBLING SUCH AS HORSES, SPORTS BETS AND BLACK JACK TABLES. I SUGGEST TELLING HIM WHAT YOU HAVE LOST CANNOT BE REGAINED AND AS SOMEONE DEARLY ONCE SAID TO ME EVEN WHEN YOU WIN YOU ARE STILL A LOSER BECAUSE YOU WILL ONLY GIVE IT BACK. POSSIBLY TELLING HIM TO CONCENTRATE ON HIS BUSINESS WOULD BE A BETTER OPTION AND AS ITS HIS OWN HE CAN MAKE HIS MONEY THERE. ALSO TELLING HIM THAT IF HE CONTINUES LIKE THIS YOU WILL LEAVE HIM. I HOPE THIS HELPS YOU