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Also to Vera – all she needs is one machine. She gets stuck on one.

[Silhouette]

I just want to make it clear that I know she isn’t “winning”, but more that she is leaving without wasting everything she has. She lost most of it within the next few days.

I know poker machines are ubiquitous but in Australia they are totally unavoidable. I am sitting in public drinking a coffee and there are probably around 500 machines available within a 30 second walk. I am not exaggerating. The temptation is unavoidable. For this reason, Australian legislation prevents venues from having the volume of machines at levels audible outside the premises…. This is not enforced.

Thankfully, she is not interested in tables. I don’t think she would be happy to open a thread here, because honestly, she probably would not be happy with this thread.

I love her a lot and I understand the need to care for myself, but I don’t know what to do. I don’t even think there is anything I can do. Do gamblers ever stop?

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Hi guys,

I really appreciate all of your responses, and I apologise for my delayed response. My gf has been winning lately (the last few days at least) and, subsequently, my life is feeling a little better. This, however, is bittersweet. More winnings only bring her more to spend when she is spiralling, and therefore more pain and suffering for the both of us.

I hate the fact that I can’t deny that this is a severe problem. I want it to stop, but all I see online and in reality is that it doesn’t. After one big win I thought that, finally, it might be enough for her to call it quits. It was nothing compared to everything she had lost prior, but it was enough to temporarily allow her to consider quitting. But, as you might guess, the gambling continued. Every time that she wins, her behaviour is reinforced.

I am not sure where all of you hail from, but in Australia, there is literally a pub with poker machines on every corner. Our government pretends to care, in light of the enormous revenue it produces, but does nothing except trivialise the issue. Gambling is addictive because of its actvity in the same areas of the brain responsible for drugs and behavioural reinforcement – and poker machines are programmed to take advantage of this. Plain and simple. It is a juiced up version of the rat and lever experiment (I cannot remember the theorist). I dont know if gambling issues in the US present as table/card gambling or not, but it is a huge problem over here.

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I don’t know if I would feel comfortable with a GA meeting. I just can’t face myself. I hate the feeling I get when I lend her money or when I have to sit through a gambling session biting my nails and being assured that it was fine only to have her destroy me immediately after. I just don’t know what to do anymore.

It is becoming clear to me that I either have to choose her or myself. I need her to stop but I fear that this well never happen. The moment anything negative occurs she is back at it.

Do other partners receive this abuse too?

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