Hi Alex,
Sure hope you’re in a better space now. You and only you can affirm your worthiness to be living your life. It seems you’re looking everywhere except right within you. Not a girlfriend, not alcohol, not drugs, and not gambling. You’re so young Alex. I’m 4xs your age but I remember being 18 like it was yesterday. I’m at the time in my life when friends my age are dying or getting horrible diseases and it makes me thankful for each minute of my life. Every ounce of you is precious and I’ll be hoping you can see it.