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Happy new year everyone and looking forward to getting back to pop into the chat.
Red

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Hi V, Enjoy a well deserved break, you do such a great job in supporting everyone. Cant wait to hear all the news from the hols.
Red

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Mintchap
I don’t often comment on posts but yours story seems so close to my own Sons’ that I feel the need to do so.
Firstly you need to decide one thing – are YOU strong enough to stand up to this addiction – and also the person controlled by it?
Secondly, your boyfriend has to take responsibility for his gambling in order to move on. Ir he does do this there is hope for him and all those that love him around him, if he does not then HE will move away from all and you will eventually be dropped because you know too much 🙁
i know this unfortunately from my experience, however you as my own CG beautiful GF are young and life will throw you some tough tasks to deal with. Choose the battle that you have the energy for!
Decide wisely and do not spend years of thinking you can change a person or yourself . XX

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Due to work

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How great to see all you lovely birds tonight. To realise that we all got through the tough time of year and yet still managed to laugh is true recognition of the importance this Forum gives to everyone, CG their family and friends. I can never thank you enough especially V who has dedication to others that is so rare in human time availability these days that makes her even more of an ANGEL. See you Thurs, Reg. XX

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Hi V,
Are you swapping times??
Tuesday is now 20hr-21hr and Thursday is no longer 20-21 but moved to 22-23hr??
Confused.com 🙂

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Hi,
I feel your pain and know where you are just now. I WAS there about a year ago and then I found this site. That was when I stopped enabling my son and believing the lies his addiction was telling me. Is it any easier today – not yet. HOPE – yes and more important you will get strength from the lovely friends and family on this site. Xx

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First let me say how much I feel your pain, but also you have found agreat support by coming to this Forum. The support group on a Thursday night at 8pm (GMT) is very helpful and even more important strictly private.
As a mother it is our natural instinct to FIX things for our kids, but sometimes fixing does not help them learn.
I too have a lovely Son lost deep inside a gambler. Like you I have done the threats, pleads and set some boundaries – all to no avail so far. The advice you have above is very clear, he needs to take responsibility of his addiction and will be unable/unwilling to do that while he continues to be enabled by receiving financial assistance from family, friends etc as that just frees up more money.
I hope you will make it to the support group and find some more strength to do the difficult things that your Son now needs to help him on the path to wanting recovery.
It’s not easy being a parent. Xx

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Hi Lily,
Just want to let you know we miss you and hoping both you and your son are OK?
Thinking of you. Xx

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Not getting to see full posts this WK -away – but sorry to see your having such a tough time. At a show on Thursday but will try get some time to see you. Be strong & silent for your own sake and have a break from the drama of gamblers & their issues. Thinking of you. Xx Red. Xx

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Vera, that is such a great post and made a lot of sense, its not always possibe L, but it you can start afresh it would be such a clean start.

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When times get tough as they often will
When the road ahead seems all uphill
When the funds are low and the debts are high
and you want to smile but have to sigh
Stick to the battle when your hardest hit
Its when things seem worst that you must not quit.

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Hi CC,
So sorry to hear that your little glimmer of hope in the word sorry was so short lived. Unfortunately I’ve realised that the blame and anger are always thrown back at the person trying to help.
While it is heartbreaking to hear and feel this level of Abuse it is unfortunately part of the cycle, often followed by silence.
Try to stay strong and cling to the single nice thing you son has said to you in the past and not what the CG is saying to you.
It’s difficult when familly don’t understand or even really hear you but having just one person who is supporting you ccan be enough and you will have lots and lots on this site.
I hope when the tears have eased that you get some rest tonight.
Hopefully see you tomorrow night in the group.
Red

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Grow up to hurt us. I read your story and feel you pain. My best friend also my cousin took her own life last week suffering from depression. My son sent me a text message tellnig me he was having bad thoughts two days later – he wanted money……
He knew I was vulnerable and in shock and it has hurt so bad I have thought of following her.
To hurt the person who gave life to you is the utmost cruelty but this group give me strength and the ability to go on in hope.
Redare. Xx

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I really appreciate you talking the time to write. While my heart is broken at my Son going down this road that I’m all too familiar with I have to try & stop it affecting me again.
Well done on taking responsibility of CG and I wish you every continued success having a truthful happy life.
Red

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