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Still can’t stop. The debts are just too much. I can’t think straight.

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At 7 pm New York time, someone please post a message to me asking me not to gamble. Would really like some support.

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Every morning I wake up promising myself I will not gamble. Every night I go to bed wishing I hadn’t.

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Just wanted to say thanks for everyone’s support. You folks on this website are awesome!! I love the constant words of encouragement. Thanks. What a terrific “community.”

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Lost $500 of the $5000 tonight. Stupid Pacers couldn’t hit 2 free throws at the end of regulation only to get blown out in OT. Typical loss for me. I hate being a compulsive gambler. I hate myself.

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Because in the past I have just redeposited. I need to stop. Not just block myself, but stop. I find ways around blocks, especially when motivated by the urge. I need to stop betting. I need to go a few days without betting and build the will and ability to do that. From what I can tell from researching, the initial effort to quit requires going at least 30 days. That seems to be the hardest first goal to hit. After that, there’s still the added need to avoid relapse. But that appears to occur when people believe they can now control their wagering and start again. I’m in the early stage. I need to go 30 days without betting and start getting the urge to dissipate. Then I can work at more permanent barriers to avoid relapsing. But right now, I’ll find away around barriers. I need to get myself to stop. I have to get through my first goal of 30 days. I’m close to getting through day 1 with funds and opportunity available. If I can do this, it will go a long way to boosting my confidence in my ability to completely stop.

I know it’s a long road, and a lot more battles to win in this war. I’ve got to get 30 days under my belt and see what that does for my urge. Hopefully it will reduce it. But I won’t know until I get there. I hate being a compulsive gambler.

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Have gone through half the day without making a wager. Have the $5000 sitting in a wagering account waiting for action and I have not logged in to look at it. Avoiding watching sports today. Want to put an end to this. If I can make it through today, knowing there is money available to wager and some good games today, then I think it will help with my willpower in the future. Got to get through today. Halfway there (and living on a prayer).

I would take having any other addiction over a gambling problem. Being a compulsive gambling is just terrible.

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Haven’t been able to stop. Just hit a 6 team $100 parlay to win $5000. And all I can think about is how much I can win with that $5000. Why am I betting 6 team parlays? Why am I making long shot wagers? Yes, it hit. But it’s not a smart bet. I know I’m not thinking straight. The win makes me think I can keep doing it, when I know all I will do is lose it. I don’t like the fog I’m in right now. I wasted all weekend stressing about my bets rather than enjoying time with my family. And all I have to show for it is $5000 that I’m just going to lose anyways.

I hate being compulsive gambler.

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I’m done with this forum. Not enough support here. I was hoping folks would post and support me through this. But I didn’t get that. Too bad. Maybe there’s a more active site out there that will be more helpful.

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Thanks for the response. Was getting lonely posting to myself. Yes, I’m halfway through Day 2! The evening will be the biggest challenge. Last night was tough. I think my first gambling free day since August (on my daughter’s birthday). It was great waking up today and not thinking about some crazy backdoor cover three pointer at the buzzer. I did wake up thinking about the debt, but at least that’s something I can control. Will start working on a budget and payment plan. But right now just need to get through Day 2 and get on the path to no more gambling (and no more gambling debt). Staring at the debt I realize I’ll never win enough to pay it. That’s a helpful realization because each time I got up to $20k in winnings, I kept playing for more. I never got it up to $50k in winnings, so no point in trying. And I would never stop at $20k, so again, even if I got on another winning streak it wouldn’t help. I’m writing this all so I remind myself of these facts in moments of temptation or weakness. I feel sick thinking about how much I’ve lost. But there’s nothing I can do about that now. Just have to move on.

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Going to bed. I made it. Day 1 in the books. No thanks to this website. What a joke. No support whatsoever.

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Disappointed by the lack of support here. I’m going to make it. But this website is terrible. No support. Very disappointing.

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Just one more hour and all I want to do is bet on the NBA games. I can do this. And after I do, I can read about how hard day 1 is and how’ve never want another day 1 again. 1 hour. I can make it.

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Just 2 more hours until I go to bed and get through Day 1. I like winning. Not losing. And I lose at gambling. But that’s because I have no control of that. Some idiot misses a free throw or throws a pick six in the final minute, and I’m loser for that!? No more. No more betting. Winning is not betting. I’m 2 hours away from winning today. We can do this. Quitting is winning.

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I love of this post. We can do this. I’m about 2 hours away from getting through Day 1. You’re right. I like winning. Not losing. And I lose at gambling. But that’s because I have no control of that. Some idiot misses a free throw or throws a pick six in the final minute, and I’m the loser for that!? No more. No more betting. Winning is not betting. And yeah, we’re not powerless over quitting like they say in GA (plus too many breaches of anonymity with the big mouths). We can do this. Quitting is winning.

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