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hi Vera hope you get a run of day duty now and you start to get a good nights sleep its no joke a lack of sleep.had urges yesterday again i suppose i was thinking after getting the car threw the test and working hard at my recovery this 70 odd days it was time for a well earned gamble. last night i went on the drink with a mate and just took enough cash and no cards, today urges are gone thank God im trying to think before i act adaat. my mothers nerves arnt great atm God help her it comes on her every year or 2 and can last usually between 3 and 6 months she worries to much about us all. Vera a lot of people on here rooting for you hope you have a good weekend.Take care

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thanks 4 the posts. Day 74 got threw the car test this morning and i felt good about it as the day has gone i have wanted the we high to continue its like i feel i deserve a bet to celebrate my good news. just thought i would share that and im hoping having admitted to it i will realise its a big no no. hoping to give my mate more money back tomorrow and tax car i dont have much money but my mind is playing tricks with me telling me go on have a we bet. yep i do change my mind a lot haha well im going to stay focused adaat. i use to get sick of all the ole catchphrases at G.A but theyre all true hope i dont have 2 learn the hard way any longer. Good day with the car and keeping my guard up!

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hi Vera good to hear from you you love your indians i am more a macaris man when you said you were working tonight it made me think of all my ole haunts up there the greyhound the bell the vortex and ice haha theyv all probbly different names now. look after yourself Vera

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hi Vera good to hear from you you love your indians i am more a macaris man when you said you were working tonight it made me think of all my ole haunts up there the greyhound the bell the vortex and ice haha theyv all probbly different names now. look after yourself Vera

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hi Vera good to hear from you you love your indians i am more a macaris man when you said you were working tonight it made me think of all my ole haunts up there the greyhound the bell the vortex and ice haha theyv all probbly different names now. look after yourself Vera

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well Ed thanks 4 all your support mate. keep doing what your doing its working isnt it great adaat having none of them moments at the end of eastenders when the music comes on. Celtic playing the hibees at the end of may in the cup final i cant believe im going to say this but wouldnt mind if the hibees won they havent won the cup in over a 100 years felt bad for them last year when ther edinburgh rivals beat them 5-1 in the final. the hibees helped celtic out a lot 125 years ago when celtic was being formed. mind you during the game il probably not be as sympathic to the hibees haha but you know what i mean

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Что ж, Эд благодарит всех твоих товарищей по поддержке. продолжай делать то, что делаешь, его работа, разве не здорово, когда не бывает ни одного из моментов в конце пасхи, когда включается музыка. Селтик играет с хиби в конце мая в финале кубка Я не могу поверить, что собираюсь это сказать, но не возражал бы, если хиби выиграли, они не выиграли кубок более 100 лет, им было плохо в прошлом году, когда их победили соперники из Эдинбурга 5: 1 в финале. хиби помогли кельтскому языку 125 лет назад, когда кельтский язык только зарождался. имейте в виду, что во время игры я, вероятно, не буду так сочувствовать хиби, ха-ха, но вы понимаете, о чем я

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hi cat well done with the six months bet free adaat i can totally relate to you being a bit panicky over trying to get past a previous best i always seem to come a cropper between 12 weeks and 20 weeks apart from a year bet free one time. this time im trying to enjoy my recovery as best i can i really am like yourself taking it adaat and with barriers in place we are and can really do this. take care

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hi Sherry thanks for your post its great to see your name up around the forum again i know you wernt away long but you were missed your so supportive of us all your a good woman! take care

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happy to be gamble free for the start of may adaat. blocks up and also trying to remember that evry timei have gambled itit sets me back at least a few months it kinda takes off a few months of my life mentally physcially financially and spirtually. dont want to lose any more time to this rotten dis ease.

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thanks RG and Sherry. Day 72 enjoying the bank holiday weekend im trying to stay in the middle no dirty big false highs or dramatic lows that make me think i need to gamble to escape my life. have enjoyed the world snooker championships this last 2 weeks and great not to be betting on who will pot the first ball of the frame etc etc madness some of the bets i placed when chasing my losses. so its been great being able to watch sport for sports sake. i say adaat a lot because to be honest i take nothing for granted with this disgusting dis ease nothing and to be honest i take nothing for granted in life. its nice to be over 10 weeks adaat in a month or2 i might have a bit of extra money so that will be new challenges for me protecting the money and myself because i hate being financially insecure i know the experts say this disease isnt about money and i know deep down it isnt but there is ***** i think it is kinda about money and maybe thats why ive been a repeat slipper over the years or maybe its because i cant admit defeat when im chasing or i cant deal with rejection or maybe i just loved gambling so much, who knows and who cares. iv noticed cgs change their minds a lot me included its funny some***** how we change our minds a lot. I feel ok today and thats all that matters!

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thanks Ed day 67 taking my car to the mechanic today to get ready for the test next wednesday i bought a part worn tyre yesterday to get thru the test if i didnt gamble i could buy a brand new car maybe in the future adaat. have to tax the car 2 but thankfully i can just about afford it all because iv been gamble free for 67 days dread to think where i would be if i had of kept slipping. 23 days to my first we target another target is a bet free summer but just for today i will not gamble

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***** me in 2 cheers

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thanks for the posts Day 51

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day 50 il post early when i have signal God knows when i will have signal again haha. great sleep last night went to bed early was very tired. im staying very very focused adaat. im staying at the home house while my parents are away and gambling is the last thing on my mind atm thank God my last slip scared the life out of me and adaat im really ready 2 change

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