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Originally posted by reds
Good news today – …
Just for today, I will not gamble away my time, freedom or peace of mind.Good to hear form you Reds, and good to hear about the good news concerning your grandson. Another event without any consequence to take from your peace of mind.
Take care, stay strong and visit often.
God’s speed.LarryThanks to my Higher Power, My 3G's – God, GA, and GT, "Day Two Is Another Day Behind" and with the help from all I hope to continue to remain gambling free.Originally posted by andyo
… in the past have tried to stop and the only reason was because a was loosing …
Good morning Andy, my name is Larry and I am a compulsive gambler, my last bet was October 17, 2013, I started recovery over three years ago not only because I was loosing, but because I finally realized and "admitted that I was powerless over gambling – that my life had become unmanageable".
Welcome to GT, a place that will help you learn how to stay stopped now that you have actually stopped and are doing something about it. We have all stopped many ***** in the past for various reasons, stopping is not the hard part, staying stopped and gambling free is he hard part, the part where we need to combat our addiction with a true desire, diligent work, and continues efforts.
Your coming here today is not only a positive step for you, but it is a reminded to us what gambling would hold for us if we were to return to our **** to test the waters, a reminded that things have not changed in the world of gambling or in the destruction that it would bring to us. Thanks for being here and being a value to our recovery as well as a renewing a value to yourself and a start of your own path to recovery.
As Velvet posted, "if what you have been doing before has not changed a thing, then maybe it is time you did something different?", this truth is also expressed in the cliche, "if nothing changes, nothing changes", and in part of the Gamblers Anonymous principles of recovery, "How does someone stop gambling through the Gamblers Anonymous Program (or another program of your choice, but I recommend trying GA)? — One does this through bringing about a progressive character change within oneself". Keep coming back here to find the ways and means to bring about the needed changes in your life, changes in your lifestyle, thinking, and attitude. Look for a live support group in you area such as GA, do all that you can to combat this addiction and stay gambling free. And the best advice that I can think of is to "not gamble for anything" while you are working on recovery; giving into an urge or temptation, an urge that will pass without causing you any harm, only strengthens the addition, while each day in this One Day At A Time process that you do not gamble strengthens you and your resolve to become the person that you are meant to be and move you toward thinking and living in a more normal way.
God’s speed, use your Higher Power to guide and strengthen you.LarryThanks to my Higher Power, My 3G's – God, GA, and GT, "Day Two Is Another Day Behind" and with the help from all I hope to continue to remain gambling free.Originally posted by barb1953
" … what I hate I do."Good morning Barb,
It was good to see a post from you again even if the circumstance that brought you back were not so good for you. However your coming back to find the help and support that each of us need is a good thing. Coming back not necessary "with all your faults", but with becoming aware of the character traits that need to be addressed and that your addiction is feeding on — "INABILITY AND UNWILLINGNESS TO ACCEPT REALITY. Hence the escape into the dream (fun) world of gambling.", is the first characteristic trait of compulsive gamblers listed in the questions asked of this issue by Gamblers Anonymous in their guidelines of recovery. You are not alone in your problem, and you are not alone in coming back after a return to gambling, of denying yourself of what you want to do by doing what you hate; you will not be judged, "we have "all come short" ~ Romans 2:23.
Not to be coy, but if you are finding that you are doing what you hate, turn the tables of your thoughts; start your recovery by hating it and hating your not being able to gamble, thereby finding yourself naturally doing something that you hate. We started gambling as entertainment and having fun; it then became a strong attraction and habit; and finally we crossed over to it being an addiction and way of life, doing something that we hated. Recovery is the opposite, we hate it at first; then it is a habit; and then it gradually becomes something that we want to do. This transition from hate to enjoyment takes time, but starts with the hate.
Recovery, the thing that we hate in the beginning, starts with us admitting and accepting that "we were powerless over gambling – that our lives had become unmanageable", and through your working at progressing past that beginning and gambling becomes something that we no longer want to do, and during this process we also fine the addiction sending us off to gamble again, we need to realize that at that point "if I do what I do not want to do, it is no longer I who do it, but it is sin (my addiction) living in me that does it" ~ Romans 7:20.
In recovery we also "Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to a normal way of thinking and living" and we "Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of this Power of our own understanding". It is apparent that for you that HP is your God, use the strength and guidance that comes from your God and continue on you path of recovery, continue the transaction from hating recovery to the time that recovery will be a way of life and the benefits will be your enjoyment, a time that you will once again be you and not the person controlled by an addiction.
Forgive me for rambling on and if I came across as preaching or flaunting my attraction to GA, or if the above may seem confusing, but it is working for me in my progress, and most of what I post here, while born out of post like yours and is a reply to you, it is also addressed to myself and is something that I need to remind myself of. "It works if you work it, it don’t if you don’t".
God’s speed. Stay strong.
p.s The Apostle Paul and his transition from Saul, a man on the wrong track, to a man doing what was right, is where I got my screen name. Not relating myself to a Saint, but to the transition.LarryThanks to my Higher Power, My 3G's – God, GA, and GT, "Day Two Is Another Day Behind" and with the help from all I hope to continue to remain gambling free.Originally posted by fuuuuuu66
… I started gambling in 2009 … but, … i know i need to stop and I have stopped today …
Good afternoon F6. my mane is Larry and I am a compulsive gambler, my last bet was October 17, 2013, but I stopped gambling in ’09 the year to started. I have made it past both my starting date that I can not pin down to any definite time, it gradually went from entertainment, to an attraction, to my crossing the line and becoming addicted, past my crash a few months back, to the present. Now I have progressed past both my starting and stopping date and my newest clean date into daily living a better a more normal life One Day At A Time. You can do this too, but the true test is today, not in the middle of the month; use today as the day for one of your wishes from the past to change into a desire for you to not gamble in the now, and in the future — your wish or need to stop can be granted today. Use today to begin fulfilling the hope of a better life for you and your family by working on your recovery and the changes in your life that is required for you to stay stopped, any needed changes in your lifestyle, thinking, and your attitude, and changes in your addictive controlled need to live in a *** and deceit. "Without change there will be no change".
Thanks for coming here and sharing your story, you and your story are important to us, we in recovery need to be reminded at ***** about the problems that gambling brings without us having to go out to test the waters ourselves. Hearing from compulsive gamblers like yourself that are newly starting on your journey that noting has changed in a life of gambling helps keep us from tempting a return to our ****.
Now that you have taken the first step by coming here and telling your story, take the next step and follow the advice and direction that Harry posted and join other compulsive gamblers form your area in using Gamcare. Also look into using additional help form a live support group like Gamblers Anonymous, the UK site is also listed in Harry’s post, You might even stop by here and read the post of others even if you can not post back and forth with those outside of Great Britian; I know that I get a lot of help form other sites that only provide information, guidance, and encouragement, without any of the interaction like you will find at Gamcare. Use all the help that is available to you and do all that you can to combat this addiction; take action and do something, you searched for this site and found it and now have found the links to other sites, keep doing and not just wishing. – "You have to go after recovery, it does not come to you".
Work at accepting the wisdom in being honest with your wife and the courage to reach out to her; she can be a great source of help to you in many ways, including having control of your having easy and unaccountable access to the monthly payments you receive and the money you spend — she can also be a good shoulder to cry on when things are bad. And if, God forbid, you have already went past any hope for forgiveness and redemption, it is better for her to know it now instead of latter when things could be even worst without her help, she deserves to live a more normal life too.
God’s speed, use your Higher Power to strengthen and guide you.LarryThanks to my Higher Power, My 3G's – God, GA, and GT, "Day Two Is Another Day Behind" and with the help from all I hope to continue to remain gambling free.Originally posted by inner child
… an investment in my daughter …Good morning IC,
In reading your post I see your not gambling and facing responsibilities as more than just an investment in you daughter, it is an investment in you, your life and everything that is good, important, and worthwhile. I have mentioned the GA 20 Questions a few time in other post and will mention another one here, my answer to question 13 -"Did gambling make you careless of the welfare of yourself or your family?" is the one that haunts me the most and makes me realize how much I took form my loved ones, and myself; and my undeniable answer of ‘yes’ is the one that guides me in making the amends that I have been able to made and work at, and consequently also lessened or removed uncalled for guilt and helped put needless regrets to rest.
You are right, how cheep is $40 when compared to the hundreds and hundreds that we have gambled away. And no matter how cheep reasonable such amount is in providing for the welfare of your family, or to allow yourself some quality time, the results are priceless; it is not just buying a few days of enjoyment and a learning experience for your daughter, or a night out for you and your husband, it is being able to again enjoy what gambling took your you.
God’s speed. Stay strong. Live and enjoy the more normal way of thinking and experiencing the adventures of life.LarryThanks to my Higher Power, My 3G's – God, GA, and GT, "Day Two Is Another Day Behind" and with the help from all I hope to continue to remain gambling free.Originally posted by trulyshi
… I guess I slipped …Good morning Debbie,
I have similar thoughts about your recent adventure in life as Bettie, do not let what your counselor calls a slip take away from your living a gambling free life. Some programs try to warn us about what is considered to be gambling, and have strict perimeters as to when someone has to claim a new clean date, but when we go into a situation unfamiliar to us, we might find ourselves on a slippery slope, but slipping is not falling; we can regain our composure and balance and continue on our path with the new knowledge and insight that we gained. If having to claim a new clean date is rules that your program follows, use a new clean date — the first introduction to slipping, and a resulting fall, is to challenge rules that have been proven to be beneficial, and oddly enough, they may be more beneficial to the program itself than perhaps to an individual. But nevertheless, taking away from the program is taking away form yourself.
You may have broken the rules but as for if you gambled or not, "only you can make that decision"; but it is up to you to be truthful with yourself and recognize a dangerous situation so that you stay away form it; and to go alone with the program if need be. I know for myself, I broke the rule of "not gambling for anything" and had to change my clean date, but August 13th will always be the anniversary of the day in 2009 that I entered recovery and started working at progressing toward a more normal way of thinking and living. October 17 is now my "officially" recognized clean date and one that my GA group will recognize with accolades and tokens, but to me it is more than that, it is another day in my renewed life, not a return to the past.
These thoughts are only views on personal opinions concerning things that I feel could be left to self-governing, but I can see where others can have arguments against them and want to hold true to the doctrine of a group as a whole; they can rightfully argue against my mere views, but I can not argue against their true passion and the proof of its good. So in continuing your life of being gambling free don’t let my views influence you, but rather let them cause you to think and be honest with yourself and to be willing to do what you have to do. It is best to stick to the program that is working, it is you working and practicing these principles that have taken you this far, it is not a now "super-you" that has brought you to and keeping your at this stage of recovery and better living. "It works if your work, it don’t if you don’t".
God’s speed, Stay strong. Keep aware, and use that awareness to help you progress along this sometimes slippery road of recovery.LarryThanks to my Higher Power, My 3G's – God, GA, and GT, "Day Two Is Another Day Behind" and with the help from all I hope to continue to remain gambling free.Originally posted by crushedsoul
… I put my golf clubs on ebay- I don’t think I’ll be needing them anymore …Good morning Crushed,
I was a relief to see a post from you after your last one; another member recently posted about a revelation that they had after getting past a crises where they thought everything was lost and life was not worth living, I believe their words were "God’s not through with me yet". Hang in there.
You had to put your golfs clubs up for sell, but it is not golf that you will not be needing anymore, it is your gambling that you do not need. Most have had to sell things to either support our addiction or recoup some from its consequences, but this is one of the characteristics and "last" resorts that compulsive gamblers face; it’s par for the course. It relates to one of the questions in the GA 20 Questions about being a CG: "11 – Have you ever sold anything to finance gambling?". Gamblers Anonymous uses common sense and ask the right questions to help us through hard ***** and to get back to the person we are meant to be, to get past the point of not letting God complete us; and if not God in the Biblical meaning, it is our Higher Power that guides our will and molds our lives until completion. Consider looking for help in a GA meeting near you, use this Club House of recovery to get yourself together and then go out and finish the last nine holes of your life, play out your game, not the one controlled by your addiction.
God’s speed. Stay strong. Keep posting, keep holding on.LarryThanks to my Higher Power, My 3G's – God, GA, and GT, "Day Two Is Another Day Behind" and with the help from all I hope to continue to remain gambling free.Originally posted by bettie
… look at the pizza, thought it look weird …
… "FIRE FIRE~BUZZ BUZZ BUZZ" …Good morning Bettie,
First, if it was a Chicago style pizza they look weird in the first place lol (reference to past post on pizza). I am glad that you were able to prevent a fire thought, Catherine O’Leary had her cow to blame for burning down Chicago, you would have had to blame a pizza while singing "There’ll be a Hot Time in the Old Town Tonight".
Joking aside, I am happy the you are ok, kitchen fires or the main cause for serious damage, you were fortunate.
God’s speed.
p.s. see http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ERXq3r1Kq0Q
LarryThanks to my Higher Power, My 3G's – God, GA, and GT, "Day Two Is Another Day Behind" and with the help from all I hope to continue to remain gambling free.Originally posted by vera
24 days to go … what then ? …
"Then what?", then comes March, April, May, and so on; but more important than these days of a more distant future is tomorrow, Feb 5, a day that will show the good that not gambling today provides for, and one that will reduce February’s days to go to 23.
ODAAT, they add up, and subtract from any longer term goal.
Also, it is good to see post from you Vera in the various replies that you make to other’s your encouragement and thoughtfulness is both a help to them and you. Today I join you in an "implied monthly pact" in addition to the pledge here.
God’s speed, yet still be patient. The days and months will pass soon enough; if we continue to diligently work at being gambling free we will experience continued recovery.LarryThanks to my Higher Power, My 3G's – God, GA, and GT, "Day Two Is Another Day Behind" and with the help from all I hope to continue to remain gambling free.Originally posted by uncontrolled
Fantastic thread from Colin. It gives me hope and hope it inspires everyone…………..
Good morning,
I am thinking that Colin might be reading some of the post here so I too will comment on his Anniversary post again. It is a few weeks, or days, past January 13, but in recovery what does a day matter accept that it is how we work out our problems, practices our recovery, and live our lives.
For the last couple of years I mentioned how this topic and Colin’s other topics and post have been a great inspiration and have shown a path for the rest to follow. Today a new member, Uncontrolled, bares witness to this fact; the fact that the post from the past from the different ones that have breathed life into this program can help us all. It may not necessary be the words that they wright ,although they do seem to be somewhat poignant at the time, for each of us tells the same story in our own ways, but the help comes from our searching for help and inspiration — "We have to go after recovery, it does not come to us", and spending time and effort to add strength to our resolve is a good way to take this action.
So thanks Uncontrolled for awaking in others the idea that there is more to this site than today’s post and replies, that there is hope to be found in the later pages of the forums, and in the archives. Thanks also for bringing Colin’s anniversary post to the forefront, his story is an inspiration to us all.
And once again Colin if you do happen to read this, forgive my intrusion on any form of recovery you have been practicing away from this site, and for any presumption of that this year will mark another year for your living gambling free, but in doing so I am sending you belated yet still hopeful congratulations for 17 years of living gambling free.
God’s speed my friend. Stay strong.LarryThanks to my Higher Power, My 3G's – God, GA, and GT, "Day Two Is Another Day Behind" and with the help from all I hope to continue to remain gambling free.Originally posted by jayson
20 years gambling………10 years of anger , emotions, frustration , building up………..
… i broke down and cried like a big girly…..Good evening Jay,
If these pages were written in ink instead of pixels, the words would be running down in streams. I think that we all, both us men, and the women, have shed many tears from time to time.
Enjoy the feeling of freedom, enjoy a more normal way of living.
God’s peed. Stay strong, manly strong even with the not-so-girly- tears. LarryThanks to my Higher Power, My 3G's – God, GA, and GT, "Day Two Is Another Day Behind" and with the help from all I hope to continue to remain gambling free.Originally posted by bettie
… Went to a meeting on Friday. I feel out of place there these days …Good morning Bettie,
A meeting room is not a "Social Club", the only requirement for belonging to GA is the desire to stop gambling, the main reason to go is to pursue and honor that desire. "Principles before Personalities" is a hard guideline to keep in mind when we feel isolated form the group; or when our perception of things may be a little off due to other problems that we are dealing with; or when we are not finding the quality of support that we ourselves are giving to others and think that everyone should be giving all also, like you give daily in all of your involvement with others.
Nevertheless, putting the principles of recovery first is what we need in allowing us to find something that helps us when we attend meetings (there are three time that we should go to a meeting; when we feel like it; when we don’t; and the times in between) — "take whatever helps you (even if it is only the fact that you went) and leave the rest behind". And who knows, you might be helping them and being what they need when you attend; another principal of GA is to help others. You are a great help here, and must be one to the other members of GA as well without you realizing it or them acknowledging it.
God’s speed. Stay strong.
LarryThanks to my Higher Power, My 3G's – God, GA, and GT, "Day Two Is Another Day Behind" and with the help from all I hope to continue to remain gambling free.Originally posted by crushedsoul
… i am in a state of uncomparable depression … I am a ticking time ****Crushed, please look for help for you in heading in a different direction. Use the help lines found in the link for befriender at the upper right side of this page, or just go directly to the page for the US here: http://www.befrienders.org/helplines/helplines.asp?c2=USA, select your State and city and make a call. There will be a list of phone numbers for a few support locations for you area, call and visit one of them. You can also directly call the National Hotline at 1-800-SUICIDE (7842433). Or call your doctor, a loved one, or minister; do something.
We do not know you that well, but we all care. We are you, we have been able to more forward and so can you.
Make the call.
Larry
Thanks to my Higher Power, My 3G’s – God, GA, and GT, "Day Two Is Another Day Behind" and with the help from all I hope to continue to remain gambling free.– 2/3/2013 3:50:11 PM: post edited by paul315.Originally posted by gg27… everyone deserves one chance..
Good morning GG, my name is Larry and I am a compulsive gambler, my last bet was October 17 (my screen name is paul315). Thanks for sharing your story with us here, we in recovery need to be reminded at ***** about the problems that gambling brings without us having to go out to test the waters ourselves. Hearing from those that are adversely affected by the actions of other compulsive gamblers helps keep us from tempting a return to that life.
In your looking forward to hearing from someone and your asking for some advice, advice as to what and how you should deal with your CG and proceed with your own life. The best advice I can think of is that for you to take care of yourself. Follow the suggestion of the other Paul and look into the help that you can receive from Gamcare and the GB members there. You might also be able to continue to read the post of other affected family members in the Friends and Family Forum here without logging on to add to the advice and support you can receive form a service that you can interact with; there sharing, stories, and advice given to others can be a great help to many.
As a compulsive gambler myself I truly believe that everyone deserves a chance, maybe more, but I also have come to realise and believe that that chance in one that I give and take for myself. It is helpful for our friends and family to give us a chance to make amends and continue to be part of their lives, but we are the ones that have to make the more important efforts. As someone harmed by a CG and are now living with his efforts to recovery, it is important for your to take steps to protect yourself and your property; we as CGs have good intentions and make promises, but some***** the addiction takes over and we find ourselves going bake to taking from others to support the addiction. It does not necessary happen, and it does not have to happen, but some of the best help that our loved ones can give us other than their love and support to help us during such ***** is to remove any temptations and access to funds, and to the easy ways to obtain them through ********, eliminating the ways the might enable us to gamble at ***** when our guard may be down..
You might also look into finding some professional couples counselling and encourage him to seek counselling for his addiction through services such as Gamcare or Gamblers Anonymous. Do all you can to help your partner, to keep your relationship strong, but most important, to protect yourself and to be able to live a happy life.
God’s speed, use your Higher Power to guide and strengthen you.LarryThanks to my Higher Power, My 3G's – God, GA, and GT, "Day Two Is Another Day Behind" and with the help from all I hope to continue to remain gambling free.Originally posted by inner child
8 days of not gambling
Good morning IC,
Well done. Keep working at adding additional days to not only an accumulation of gambling free days, but to the ***** of a more normal way of thinking and living, and the benefits that they provides for as well.
Again, well done. God’s Speed. Stay strong. Keep following the actions required for your progress.LarryThanks to my Higher Power, My 3G's – God, GA, and GT, "Day Two Is Another Day Behind" and with the help from all I hope to continue to remain gambling free.