[paul315]

Originally posted by vab45
"In the middle of difficulty lies opportunity"
Good evening Kathryn, once again I am using your topic to post to someone else in case she reads your post more frequently then others – I do, so, thanks for the opportunity to try and reach vab45; for some reason her topic pages have been closed.
Vab,
It looks like you hit the "Close Topic" tab instead of the "Post Reply" on your topics.  I was just going to say that it was good to talk with you in Group today, but will now add, hope to see you back posting to your own site soon. You can either start a new one or email for GT to reopen one or both of the closed ones. If it was closed for other reasons, keep reading and logging in with the Group sessions.
God’s speed to you both.
LarryLarry"Day Two Is Still Another Day Behind" – With the help of a Higher Power, My 3G’s – God, GA, and GT, I will not face another Day 2.

[paul315]

— 1/6/2010 1:54:06 AM: post edited by paul315.

[paul315]

Originally posted by kathryn

HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE!!
Well my New Year was pretty good, 2 whole glasses of champagne…WOOHOO…PARTY ANIMAL!!! lol
I spent the day with my sister, we went to Aireys Inlet … We had lunch down there, man, was it hot…i mean stifling, boiling hot. … 
… Anyway, wishing us all here a fantastic 2010, i cant help but wonder what this year will bring for me, but as long as im not gambling i know i am going to have a great year. 

Good morning Kathryn, and Happy New Year to you and your family.
I woke to a -6o C, and read your post, but wait, the seasons will reverse, maybe not as drastic – but a change that you will notice. 
I am guessing your champagne had a much better taste then the cheep stuff the casinos pour out at mid-night. But even if you had the plastic-cork champagne, it’s use to celebrate rather then to drown out regrets gave it the taste of Dom Pérignon from the House of Moët & Chandon, or my favorite, from a smaller producer, Champagne Gilbert Ledru.
Don’t dwell to mush on what the year might bring, bask in your realization of how your being gambling free will allow you to face whatever lies ahead.
Larry

"Day Two Is Still Another Day Behind" – With the help of a Higher Power, My 3G’s – God, GA, and GT, I will not face another Day 2.– 1/2/2010 1:11:41 AM: post edited by paul315.

[paul315]

Happy New Year Everyone!
January 1, 2010 starts the new year for our Gregorian calendar system currently recognized throughout most of the world. And I look forward to celebrate this event "Gambling Free",I have made my Daily Pledge today so I am confident of this.
There are also many other different days that represent the beginning of the "New Year" for many other calenders, i.e., Julian, Islamic, Hebrew, Chinese, plus many more, or even individually selected Fiscal Year calendars, (and not to leave out the Old Style English calendar year starting on 25 March). Therefore, I am adding another type calender for me to go by, one on which I plan to base an even greater celebration for the years to come: My personal calender’s New Year’s Day will be on August 13, the day I started my Gambling Free Journey. Thanks to my 3 G’s, this day changed all things and allows me to enjoy each and every day of each different calender year, including today, December 31, the last day of 2009 AD, and Day 140 of my calender, my today’s One Day At A Time.
A Happy Gambling Free 2010 to all my Fellow Gamblers.
 
 
 Larry"Day Two Is Now Another Day Behind" – With the help of a Higher Power, My 3G’s – God, GA, and GT, I will not have to relive a Day 2.

[paul315]

Originally posted by kathryn

… I never live in the past, never bring things up because as far as im concerned the past is the past. …
… I wonder how long it will be before i am free of the remarks, i dont believe they are intended to be hurtful, but they do hurt. …
Life is about falling….living is about getting up!
Good morning Kathryn,
Reading over your post and the replies reminded me of some discussions during my GA meetings. I am fortunate to have some "old timers" in my group, ones with four to ten years being clean, to give me inspiration and insight into what still lies ahead in my recovery.  When some of the new members talk about how they feel when their loved ones or friends keep reminding them of what they had done, the seasoned members are quick to tell of how they still have to face such comments and questions. In fact Monday night one with 4 years being gambling free told about his wife saying how nice their Christmas was this year, and adding the comment "how surprised she was that he was not running out to gambl". He finally considered this as a compliment, but only after the hurt subdued.  
What I am trying to say is that it seems like the comments will continue long after our past is our past. And even though we try not to live in the past as far as our gambling is concerned, our past may still be others present fears; and, like these others still being reminded of our past actions and bringing them up from time to time, we also bring up things from the past, things that had nothing to do with our surpressed gambling, but, may have something to do with what others are trying to put behind them.
And just as the remarks about things concerning the past of others, their comments about your past are probably not, as you suspect, intended to be hurtful. Nevertheless, they do hurt and cause us to fall from our contented state, but these falls are all part of life, and as I have read somewhere "Life is about falling….living is about getting up!"
God’ speed.
Larry

"Day Two Is Now Another Day Behind" – With the help of a Higher Power, My 3G’s – God, GA, and GT, I will not have to relive a Day 2.– 12/30/2009 6:18:30 PM: post edited by paul315.

[paul315]

Season’s Greetings
Kathryn, just a quick post to wish you and your entire family a Merry Christmas and a prosperous New Year with you being gambling free.  Your being here has been a great help in making mine enjoyable.  Your sharing your life, has shown be that there is a better life, all we have to do is pick ourselves up and live it.
God’s speed.Larry"Day Two Is Now, Another Day Behind" – With the help of a Higher Power, My 3G’s – God, GA, and GT, I will not have to relive a Day 2.

[paul315]

Season’s Greetings
Kathryn, just a quick post to wish you and your entire family a Merry Christmas and a prosperous New Year wit you being gambling free.  Your being here has been a great help in making mine enjoyable.  Your sharing your life, has shown be that there is a better life, all we have to do is pick ourselves up and live it.
God’s speed.Larry"Day Two Is Now, Another Day Behind" – With the help of a Higher Power, My 3G’s – God, GA, and GT, I will not have to relive a Day 2.

[paul315]

Originally posted by kathryn

… ive been working. I know, how boring, wiping bums, making beds, helping with meals, wound dressing, writing care plans, handing out pills. 

Good morning Kathryn,
Your job might seem boring to others, or even yourself, but the dedication and compassion is also much appreciated.
Thanks to your kind for assisting my brother.
God bless you, and stay true to your work.Larry"Day Two Is Now, Another Day Behind" – With the help of a Higher Power, My 3G’s – God, GA, and GT, I will not have to relive a Day 2.

[paul315]

  A "RECOVERED" GAMBLER 
I just received word that my brother has died, or that his spirit has now left him; as I mentioned in Group this week, he had a massive heart attack Monday morning that left him brain dead.
This is the brother I wrote about that give me such a hard time when I told him about my compulsive gambling problem – the one who showed me tuff love.  The brother that I later learned had, and overcame a gambling problem, 50 years ago becoming a Recovering Gambler living a gambling free life.
 
But most important, he was a brother who taught me so many things and gave me so much of his life, things that I could never repay. A brother who I loved dearly.
This may seem like a strange place for a eulogy for him, but this site is part of my life and the tribute to his being gambling free after combating this disease on his own (before GA or GT) is the one I need to share here. My other tributes will relate to his world.
He is no longer a RCG, he left a "Recovered" person and a Child of God.
God bless his family.
 Larry"Day Two Is Now, Another Day Behind" – With the help of a Higher Power, My 3G’s – God, GA, and GT, I will not have to relive a Day 2.

[paul315]

Originally posted by kathryn in reply to a runninggirl post.

… I know it seems that i have just stopped, made the decision and that is that.
                   —– your story —– 
… That is when i realised that i had truly had enough.  I hated my life and everything about it and it was time to change.  That was on June 10th this year. 
… my strength and resolve not to return to that horrible person i was is so strong and is at the front of my mind all the time. …
… What i do know, is that i am so much happier
 
Dear Kathryn, I just read your post to RG an have to respond to it.  First, this is the first I have read of your gambling story, I have not read all your post from the beginning so it is a good chance that I missed it. I have read about you life during your recovery but not this.  You have came a long way.
Change a few adjectives and your story about how you reached your decision is mine. So is the report on your resolve, we share that also. We also share in living a happier life.  The biggest difference is that I have to say, "That was on August 13th this year" I had to live an additional two months in the hell we shared.
Keep your awareness fresh, and continue acting on your resolve.  I pray that we both do the same.
God bless.
Larry

"Day Two Is Now, Another Day Behind" – With the help of a Higher Power, My 3G’s – God, GA, and GT, I will not have to relive a Day 2.– 12/17/2009 12:23:58 PM: post edited by paul315.

[paul315]

Originally posted by kathryn

… he said, well, where is all the money? …
…  I looked on the statement when i got up and i cant see that there is any problems. Everything is accounted for.  I actually thought we were going really well!!!. …
…I dont know if he thinks im gambling, im assuming yes as my track record up until the last 6 months has been shocking.  But…this time im telling the truth.  Im going to show him the statement when he gets home, but usually he fobs me off and wont look at it, after all, its easier to be mad at me!
Life is about falling….living is about getting up!
Good afternoon Kathryn.
Your story doesn’t sound like a good way to be awaken in the early hours, sounds like a surprise bank audit then a "good morning dear".
I have a way of dissecting things people say to try to fine hidden or alternative meaning; as to why I do this, I have no answer, nor want one – I even place hypothetical lives upon strangers I pass on the street; furthermore the conclusions I reach more then likely replaces the real meanings with my "belief". Anyway, audits on banks are for good reason, just as your surprise interrogation may, like you said, be for good reason based on your past behaver. I use the word interrogation to show that although I see a reason, I do not agree with the extreme means. When greater trust will replace what you gave him to work with I can not say, but, and again as I read into it, your husbands refusal to look at the books may be, in his own way, a way of showing some returned trust, "if she gathered the information together, I trust that it is true".
In closing I will use some of your words with a couple of mine added; Life is about falling (or getting knocked down)….living is about getting up!, and, sitting money issues aside, you are not wrong in your thinking, you are actually doing really well – in your recovery, where it counts.
 Larry"Day Two Is Now, Another Day Behind" – With the help of a Higher Power, My 3G’s – God, GA, and GT, I will not have to relive a Day 2.

[paul315]

Day 120 Gambling Free — Month Four
Sunday,  December 13, 2009
"Be patient!  The days and weeks will pass soon enough, and as you regularly attend meetings, abstain from gambling and follow the guidelines, you will experience continued recovery" -From GA’s Yellow Book, Instructions for New Members
Edited to include the daily email received from Ken L, copied below. It is unbelievable that this is today’s reading and that it repeats words that I have shared in past GA meetings – I am not only not alone in my recovery, but I am not alone in my thoughts.
Thinking back to Aug 13, I know for certainty that if on that day I would have Pledged not to gamble for four months using only my own strength, that I would most likely have not stayed gambling free past that very day, my payday, and most surely the 20th, my next one. It is easy to see how all my past futile attempts failed. I saw this same truth at my One Month milestone. There I posted: "While I am very pleased that I can make this statement today, I find it hard to believe.  I can not start to name the times that I hopelessly said that I would not gamble for one month, or for one week or even a week-end. I have also tried, and failed, to condition my gambling  until a certain event, like the next full moon, or I would only gamble if I won a hand of Solitaire, or until my next payday.  The problems with those past attempts were that; one –  they were giving me the option to gamble again, so when I slipped I merely resumed gambling earlier then planned, not failed in my goal (although, I did on occasion keep my word not to gamble until my next payday, but, when I often failed at this goal, it cost me even more in the high overdraft and returned check fees); and , two – the time frames I set, even the "one week" or "few days" restrictions, left open too big a gap for outside influences to weaken my reserve." (see addendum in p.s.below)
Today, I again recognize my frailties during the past where I would stop and then slip, repeating this same pattern over and over. Now, and since Day Two, I find that I do not stop and slip and have to start over again; I am able to do this by not allowing myself to give in to any spur-of-the-moment urges or irrational reasonings, or to unrealistic hopes and fantasies – "My Elusive Dreams and Schemes",  — not allowing myself to succumb to the relentless drawing power of gambling or to be sidetracked from my efforts, not allowing myself to gamble for only that one day – One Day At A Time.
I say I do this by not allowing myself to gamble; this is true for I believe that we are in control of our actions and we make the choices. While saying this I also recognize that sometimes, and even often, this control is weaken by outside influences that results in us making imponderable choices. But, by turning our behaviors over to our Higher Power and with using the necessary help from others, these unexplainable events will diminish, and with time, be a part of our past.
The strength I need comes from God, the help I need comes from all of you, my Fellow Gambles.
God bless you all. 
 p.s.:today’s email from ken L:  
Today’s thought from Hazelden is:

You have to live on this 24 hours of daily time. Out of it you have to spin health, pleasure, money, content, respect, and the evolution of your mortal soul. Its right use, its most effective use, is a matter of highest urgency.
–Arnold Bennett

We have 24 hours to accomplish all we need tor mental, physical, and spiritual growth. Just because morning meditations have been read, the work or school day is completed, and the day is waning doesn’t mean growth time is over.

The first 12 hours of a day are usually spent housecleaning, raising children, working, running errands, and so on. By the time the activities have ended, we’re ready for the second 12 hours: contemplation, relaxation, communication with family and friends, socializing, eating dinner, going to a meeting, sleeping.

Our most effective use of each day means believing we can accomplish something. There is time to be grateful for each day’s experiences. There is time to build relationships with ourselves and others. Each day there is time to grow.
I did add to my simular words, that this leaves very little time to gamble; to have more gambling time, we have to deprive ourselves of sleep and the responcibilities and happyness in everyday life.
Larry

"Day Two Is Now, Another Day Behind" – With the help of a Higher Power, My 3G’s – God, GA, and GT, I will not have to relive a Day 2.
 — 12/13/2009 6:30:19 PM: post edited by paul315.

[paul315]

Good morning Kathryn
Congratulations on reaching your 6 Month milestone  (I hope I am correct – if not congratulations on making it another day). You came a long way from the compulsive gambler to the RCG.  Not only have you fought you own battles, you have helped those of us here with ours.
God bless and keep you.Larry"Day Two Is Now, Another Day Behind" – With the help of a Higher Power, My 3G’s – God, GA, and GT, I will not have to relive a Day 2.

[paul315]

Originally posted by kathryn
… just trying to find big words to use in my responsibility section

Good morning Kathryn
First, it is good to read about a life that is gambling free, keep up with your efforts, you are not only living your life in this way but you are living one for us also.  (this is not meant to be an added burden, but a praise; keep doing it for yourself – the benefits to us and your friends and family cannot compare to the benefit of the good life it gives you.)
As for big words: look through this site, http://answers.google.com/answers/threadview/id/252235.html .
About the handbag, enjoy the search, you might find something for yourself,  and then just share the difficulties you had trying to please her – "it’s not the gift but the thought" haha! 
Larry

"Day Two Is Now, Another Day Behind" – With the help of a Higher Power, My 3G’s – God, GA, and GT, I will not have to relive a Day 2.
 — 12/6/2009 11:48:04 PM: post edited by paul315.

[paul315]

 
The Tooth Fairy messes up at lot, I just lost all of my teeth and didn’t get a penny – instead had to pay.
And the money she kept from me only went to some of the "rich kids" in the more affluent part of town; they come into the gift shop I work at the Science Center and tell about receiving a Hundred Dollars a tooth.  When I was young we got a quarter (25¢) but we did get to keep the tooth and turn it in at school for a nation-wide study.
And my daughter in France doesn’t have a Tooth Fairy, they have a Tooth Mouse.
Larry"Day Two Is Now, Another Day Behind" – With the help of a Higher Power, My 3G’s – God, GA, and GT, I will not have to relive a Day 2.

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