[neva]

If you and your husband bought the Condo together then his daughter probably doesn’t have much to say about it.  But, if he bought it before you got married (and never added your name or you refinanced together) then she might be in line for it since it was separate property and not considered community property. I deal with that kind of stuff through work. It’s good that you have a lawyer. If you have to walk away from the Condo, you’ll also get to walk away from any money secured by the Condo.  At least your husband set you up to collect his income and you’ll be able to move on.  Maybe it’s a blessing that you don’t have money right now because it’d be too easy to drown your worries and sorrows in front of a slot machine.  Things happen for a reason and maybe it’s meant for you to move somewhere else and onto a better life. Good things happen to good people!

[neva]

Having so much cash available made today tough.  Funny how knowing cash is in the next room that the gambling urges pop up…but I kept busy and reminded myself that my husband’s uncle would see me if I went to the casino.  Met my husband for lunch at 2:00 and then went to Home Depot to price primer and look around.  There is so much to look at, so much I would like to buy, but I need to see what our cement work will cost before I buy anything else. Fed the bottle calf and then we picked up an order for dinner.
I put the $900 for the painter in an ******** and sealed it shut.  I’m going to have him meet us tomorrow so we can show him where the water valve is and then I’m going to hand over the cash.  I just can not have cash in the house.  It’s a trigger. I’m sure ***** appreciate being paid in advance.  Money is already tight right now and to waste any of it at the casino would be insane. I am so scared to go back in debt! But the insane thought of making a little money keeps popping up in my mind. The sooner I get rid of this extra money the better.
 

[neva]

Iwon, good for you in having barriers in place so you couldn’t do more damage.  I can’t walk out a winner either.  Once, or more, time I hit something really good and also stayed until it was gone…kept playing the same machine too thinking it was ‘hot’.  It’s like it was someone else playing that money back in because I was shocked when I reached in for another twenty and my wallet was already empty.
There is no satisfaction by gambling.  If there were, once we hit $500, we’d be content that we did it and we could leave.  Keeping barriers in place will protect you in the future just like it did today.
 

[neva]

Great wisdom here!  I enjoyed reading it all.

[neva]

Ican, I loved your post on Larry’s thread about treating your cg self as you would have your kids.  So true! We let our cg get away with too much for too long.  Time for the discipline!

[neva]

Hi Libbie, you might have to limit your time with your boyfriend. I had to do that with my mom.  It’s painful but she was too much of a trigger.  Do what’s best for YOU.

[neva]

Bonkers, you’re proof that there is life after gambling…and it’s a very good life. Congratulations!

[neva]

Hi Mora, hope you read more from you.  Icandothis is right…we’re all in this together and the more you read and post, the sooner you’ll find your recovery path.  Sherry

[neva]

Congratulations on getting part of your debt paid and a plan to pay more. Just make sure to not keep yourself too short of money or you’ll feel just like you did when you were gambling…broke.  Getting to that month mark might make you feel like you deserve to gamble but remember how hard it was to get here and don’t set foot in a casino for anything.  It’s very hard to start over but, as long as you don’t gamble, the urges start easing up. Keep your barriers in place so gambling isn’t even an option.  You’re doing great!

[neva]

Bettie, I always wonder why people make rude or demeaning comments too. Doesn’t make sense.  Hope you get your pay straight.  It must be a worry not knowing what’s going to happen next. Enjoy your conference.

[neva]

Great words to hear ‘never missed a payment for the kids’. Shows that the casino hasn’t stripped everything from you. You’ve got your priorities straight and that will keep you moving forward.

[neva]

I’m still in for ODAAT and will be checking in all weekend…weekends are tough.

[neva]

Maverick, your words are a breath of fresh air with all your positive and caring posts. Some of us have bruised souls and reading such support helps more than you know.
Vera, if I was walking across the field with a bucket of milk, half of it would slop out before I even got to the poor calf!  A bottle is much easier.  The calf has a natural instinct to head-butt the mother’s udder…and he does the same thing to the bottle. It’s went flying more than once although now that he’s older, he grabs on to the bottle and doesn’t let go until it’s empty.  One head butt and I would be wearing the bucket of milk…and it’s too cold for that.
I’ll be handing over the rest of the cash to the house painter on Tuesday and hope that $900 isn’t too enticing that I would take any of it to the casino.  I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t risk it but the thought of cash being available is scary.  I’ll be glad when it’s gone…to the right place. 
Vera, you’ve made some very good points, as always.  I don’t think I need a savings in case I want to gamble (and I keep barriers so I can’t get to it).  It’s more to make sure I don’t have to charge things, in case the car breaks down, in case a really good deal comes along and my husband wants to buy.  I hate ‘asking’ for money from a credit card or person…I hate being/feeling broke.  Too many years where gambling kept me destitute and I bought cheap toilet paper and didn’t waste money on paper towels.  Talk about living during the ‘depression era’, I have but it’s from my own doing and I don’t want to be that poor again! Now I buy brand name toilet paper and always have paper towels…little things now but big deals when you’re broke.
Just typing all that renews my resolve to not step foot in a casino this weekend. 
 

[neva]

I tried to post on Mavericks thread this weekend but it was closed.  Maverick, I enjoy your caring positive posts and hope you keep on posting.
Ican, I liked your post on Cat’s monthly post.  All of a sudden my mind went blank on what it said…getting older ha ha…but I really liked it.  I know your hard time of the week is coming up and hope you have plenty to look forward to. Before you know it, the weekend will be here and you’ll be busy with your husband and gambling won’t be an issue.  Seems like we all have different ***** and days that are hard for us but we can change that up by making new habits…good habits.  It used to be that Saturday afternoons were casino time but now I meet my husband for lunch every Saturday at 3:00…a much better habit.

[neva]

You’re doing amazing!  Ed is right, make sure you put barriers on your access to cash…as insurance for a better life. You’ll never regret that you couldn’t get money to gamble but you’ll always regret the money you lost. Make sure there is no regrets.

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