[mutley]

Hi, all. I thought I’d pop on here and see how everyone is! Wowzers this is hard. I’m doing quite well at the moment but I know it’s only because I have no money at all. Having said that I did have a very tumultuous week regarding money, bills and the like. I dropped myself completely in it a few weeks ago and it’s taken me nearly 4 weeks to get out of the mess I created..gambling of course! But I didn’t go completely over the edge. I managed to come to my senses 3 weeks, 4 days and 19 hours ago and stop gambling right there and then I still had some cash in my pocket but I thought You know what You fighting a losing battle here, you will never win, gambling isn’t the answer to your problems, gambling is the problem you’re an idiot if you gamble all that money away you will be completely in the proverbial. So I stopped there and then. I have not gambled since I have scrimped and saved these last few weeks to meet my direct debits and utility bills etc. Although I have had to borrow 70 quid from my dad again I can pay him back later. If I/we could stop gambling all our problems would eventually go away. Do not feel bad for the gambling companies, and do not feel that you have to go to a particular establishment because you are familiar with the place or you like the people who work there, at the end of the day they butter you up because they want your money they do not care about you as a person. Self-exclude, use gamstop do everything you can to stop…I do not want for myself or my family to carry on doing and going through this. It has gone to stop!!!!! Stay strong and never stop trying to stop.

[mutley]

jvr3419. Hi, I have been reading your posts: Man or woman the similarities are striking. I used to go out raving a lot in the late ’80s and 90’s, at one point at least once a week, we were mad for it and all that came with it. I had a lot of issues growing up. I came from a broken home and it was not pleasant with all the infighting and arguments, I CAN remember. I’m in my 50’s now and it’s still an issue. I took drugs and drank alcohol and gambled to block out my emotional pain. I started gambling when I was 8 while on holiday with my dad, stepmother and brother. I can still remember my first gambling experience to this day. We went to Westwood Ho in Cornwall England. I went down to the on-site amusements and started play playing one of the old Bell fruit machines 5p per play. I put £11.50 in it, it was in 1977 so £11.50 was a lot of money. I had been saving all my money up all year and I lost the lot in an hour I was putrid. I didn’t tell my parents as I was too scared to tell them. I didn’t have a very good time as I couldn’t do anything for the rest of the week and kept making excuses as to why I didn’t want to do anything. I used to go to the cobbly beach and watch the waves for hours and I found a gully that seemed to be massive, when the waves came in they washed through the gully and splashed up and over onto the rocks above. I went back there years later and found the gully, it wasn’t very big at all but I was only 8 the first time I went! Yeah so that’s when I first gambled and I used to gamble whenever I could when I was younger, normally when I was on holiday with my dad and stepmother. When I reached the age of 13 the pool hall opened in the town where I live and once they got fruit machines in there that was it I was down there all the time. I used to bunk school to go I lost every penny I had all the time to the gamblers. I got a job at 15 working as a commis chef in a local restaurant and very often once I got paid I would put all my wages in the 2 fruit machines they had in the pub after I finished work. It got really bad back then. I used to steal and I used to fiddle the fruit machines for free credits but I would end up losing all the money back anyways so it didn’t really benefit me, it just turned me into a criminal. I guess it just furthered my addiction. I could quite literally go for hours here about it but I’ll continue another day. I’m trying to think when I last had a gamble….. I went to the pub the other day 5th of October I had one pint of beer I put £3.50 in the bandit and won £7.00 so I walked away thinking I just got a free pint out of that pub but did I? I’m on day 2 again now….. 45 years of gambling hell TBC…..cheers for now Mutley.

[mutley]

It always amuses me when I try and talk about and understand my massive gambling problem with people who clearly don’t have an addiction. A change to my routine, what is that all about? I don’t think I’m going to change a lifelong extremely deep-routed gambling addiction by changing my daily routine! It’s a bit like the stupid yellow panel that flashes up at the end of the constant gambling adverts on the TV that say: take time to think or when the fun stops, stop. It’s absolutely absurd to even think that you can just stop doing something that is so addictive because you just read something at the end of an advert that is basically willing you to gamble. The adverts should be banned instantly. The gambling industry should be held accountable for creating millions of addicts worldwide and made to pay a good 20% of their profits to pay for the recovery of the affected. Gambling is basically legalized drug dealing, Gambling has the same effect on people with a cocaine/crack addiction. I can’t believe the government is letting it go on as it does, well I do actually as they are all making money out of weaker more vulnerable people in society and they don’t actually care. It’s greed pure greed and power. Disgusting!!!!

[mutley]

Hi, Guys. Thanks for the reply, it really does mean a lot to me and others to whom you have replied that you care enough to do so. I know I have a problem with gambling. ( I don’t like to use the term addict even though I know I’m addicted and I will be addicted until I leave this weird and wonderful place) I have put a lot of things in place to stop myself from gambling over time, trust me. I have in the past installed Gamblock on my devices but I was that hell-bent on gambling one day I went and spent £500.00 on a new laptop to circumvent the blocking software. I went on to lose 2.5K that day, a sole destroying amount of money (credit card) I self-excluded from 98% of landbased casinos in the UK under the Sense scheme about 7 years or so ago but I reversed it once the time was up, having said that I didn’t actually play on the day I reversed the exclusion as I had a 7-day cooling-off period I think it was or it might have been 24hrs I can’t remember now but I haven’t set foot in one since I first self-excluded, so that really helped. I have self-excluded from all the bookies in the town I used to live in and the nearest city which also helped but you can only self-exclude for a certain amount of time on all of these schemes, once it runs out and you give notice you want to be able to go back in, you can and it all starts again if you can’t control the habit. I think the slogan if the fun stops, stop is offensive because the gambling companies know that you are addicted and in many ways, they are just pacifying the Gambling Commission and the government as they know some of the people who have self-excluded will end up going back and losing their money which is basically what they want. I don’t think they actually care about the destruction gambling can cause in a person’s life, they just want your dollars! Try saying to a drug addict or an alcoholic (a person with a drink and/or a drug problem) you’re going a bit over the top there mate/miss. I think you’ve stopped having fun so you should stop, they’d probably try and rip your head off your shoulders if they were rattling. I do understand the other side of the coin and realise the sector employs a lot of people but not sure if it’s right given how many people are jumping under trains and taking overdoses etc, that’s all kept on the down-low as well. Anyhoot I have put a lot of things in place to stop myself from gambling and I am getting better. I didn’t gamble today or yesterday and I don’t intend to tomorrow either. I have gone back to work and been doing a lot in the garden to occupy myself and I’m enjoying that. I’ve got potatoes on the go tomatoes, green beans, raspberries, strawberries, chillies, peppers…allsorts TBH. Stay strong and never give up trying to give up!

• This reply was modified 3 years, 8 months ago by mutley. Reason: Spelling mistake
• This reply was modified 3 years, 8 months ago by mutley. Reason: Grammar mistake

[mutley]

I thought it was good!

[mutley]

I thought it was good!

[mutley]

Nice poem that, so so true what can we do?

[mutley]

Nice poem that, so so true what can we do?

[mutley]

I feel your sentiment. I’m back here again, all gone including my soul. What an awful deseise.

[mutley]

I feel your sentiment. I’m back here again, all gone including my soul. What an awful deseise.

[mutley]

Hi all. I guess stopping working was a bit extreme but if it breaks the cycle? I was so much in debt I couldn’t borrow off any banks or credit card companies any more. I couldn’t even get a payday loan in the end, and family would no longer lend me money which really got under my skin at first but in the end, I realised they were acting as feeders if that’s the right word. So my dad put his foot down and said I’m not lending you any more money and you’re on your own now so if you mess up you’ll have to sort it out yourself and I did already owe him a lot of money. So if I didn’t work, no money, no gambling and it did work. It’s much the same now during Covid although I am back at work now and have a couple of quid in my pocket I can’t gamble because everywhere is closed and I can’t go online as blocked everything using Gamblock, it’s brilliant!! I haven’t gambled now for a good while, perhaps 6 weeks or more I haven’t counted this time and this are looking up I have paid a small amount of debt back and working away quite happily. The true test is coming up though when things open up again…. will I get tempted? Yes, of course, I will I’ve been described by a mental health nurse as a pathological gambler, which I guess means I’m addicted to gambling so it’s going to be tough out there once things get back to the new normal but I think I’ve gained a bit of strength over the last few months so maybe, now I’ll be able to stay gamble free forever. Regards, Mutley.

[mutley]

I have been reading some of your threads to and it has inspired me to battle through these urges as I know you have stopped gambling for a long time and I am very proud of you and I want to be able to say I haven’t gambled for as long as you haven’t. It’s sometimes good to bounce off someone else when you are trying to achieve something in life, a bit like if you start at the gym and then your mates tag along because they are getting jealous that you are making progress. Sometimes, though, the reverse side of that is people try to get you to carry on doing the very thing you are trying to stop. I had this with smoking, in the past when I have tried to stop doing it my so called friends have bent over backwards to get me to smoke again because they were still smoking. There must be a scientific name for this kind of behaviour but I don’t know what it is. I haven’t experienced this when trying to stop gambling, though. I’ve had quite a lot of abuse off people close to me, my Dad and my brother being the worst but not my friends they have been very supportive. Any hoot great to hear from you and my it continues your recovery. Like you, in the future, I might be able to say I have paid off all my gambling debt but not for a very long time and a lot of hard work!

[mutley]

It sounds like you have got the right idea, get it out your system and move on because it isn’t funny if it gets to the dizzy heights it did me and some other fellow gamblers on here. Are you from the UK? if so there are many things you can do to stop you from gambling if you get the urge, self-exclusion being one of them. If you’re an internet casino person self-exclude from the sites where you play and others when you can, get Gam Block on your computer, give your cash to a trusted friend or relative and resist those urges. Keep trying and it can be done, I hope.

[mutley]

Hi, all I hope it’s going well for you all with your battle not to give in to this “swear word, swear word,” disease it is really doing my head in today, the worst yet in 72 days or however long it is I haven’t gambled for. It came on real bad at about 2 pm this afternoon and in the past, I would have definitely caved in and gambled, without a doubt! I don’t want to go down that road anymore so I have battled with all my heart to resist the urges and so far I’m winning (there’s a first time for everything I guess) I’m pleased I self-excluded because that has made it very difficult for me to gamble in my hometown. If you are struggling with your gambling I cannot recommend self-excluding enough. I’d have to travel 20 miles to gamble so I resisted the urges went and bought a cookbook and some ingredients and that’s what I’m going to do make some nice food! and hope that works, then on to the gym later to sweat the disease out my body. Maybe in the morning, I won’t be craving so much. Any hoot folks I hope you are all winning your own battles.

[mutley]

Hi, Jonny soz m8 didn’t mean to offend you if I did that is. I was just trying to say without patronising anyone that I really have felt a withdrawal type effect a bit like when you stop smoking which I have also done on Xmas day I thought why bother waiting until New Years day just stop now init. Anyway, I really have craved gambling bad and it’s made me very mardy that I haven’t done it even before I stopped smoking so I knew it was from the gambling. I joined the gym to try and take my mind off it, the gambling, the smoking and the extra time all in one little package so let’s see how long I can keep that up. I still haven’t gambled I’m on day 70 now I think which is very good. Keep up the good work everyone it can be done it is not an easy thing but you can do it Here are a couple of tips: I went to the National Problem Gambling Clinic in London paid for by the NHS which was amazing! I self-excluded from all the local bookies in my town and in the city closest to me so I just cannot go in them at the moment, a massive weight off my shoulders!! I have also self-excluded from 98% f the land based Casinos in the Country using the Sense self-exclusion system so I basically cannot go into any casinos ye ha! I really wanted to stop and these small things all added together really make that difference. I have also systematically opened then self-excluded from as many internet Casinos I possibly could to the point I couldn’t find anymore that I would ever trust to play on so that’s the end of that for the moment. I know you can always gamble but putting these blocks in place really has worked for me. It might be worth a try it may help someone in their battle to beat this horrible disease.

Stay strong and never give up trying to give up!

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