Thank you for your thoughtful response, and I agree with everything you said. I will definitely think more about opening up to my girlfriend about it. I will commit to posting and updating here as much as I can. I think in the meantime, while I do not open up to my girlfriend, I can see this forum as a pillar of support for me. In the past, when I was able to get through a month or two, the urges went away, but I also had not experienced huge losses yet. I think that I will need to prove it to myself over even more time to get through this.
