[mookie78]

Hi Harry,
Thanks for your reply. I do feel however that I can’t convincingly say I am ‘against’ online poker when I don’t even know how the game works or how he plays. That’s why I agreed on an ‘information session.’
I also feel instinctively that he isn’t compulsive or addicted but I find the lifestyle he has due to poker pretty unappealing: he stays up til 5am chainsmoking and eating rubbish while he plays and then sleeps til midday. (I mean come on, there’s a world out there! and I want to be part of it and be a useful member of society!!). It seems such a pointless and empty way to spend your time. Especially when he has another occupation which is really wonderful and something a lot of people would kill to be able to do. I don’t get it!
He didn’t seem willing to consider stopping when we last discussed this…he was much more focussed on my informing myself and ‘accepting it over time.’ I really really don’t think I will. But there is so much good about him too that I don’t want to take a black and white stance and throw away the relationship…then again I don’t see how I can help him if he doesn’t see a problem 🙁
 

[mookie78]

Hi Velvet,
Thanks a lot for your reply. At the moment I’m really not sure if it’s an addiction (I know addictions when I see them as I’m an ex problem-drinker) as he does seem able to take it or leave it. It’s more that I find the idea of playing poker for a living pretty empty…

His other argument is that poker isn’t like betting on horses or whatever, because it’s a game of skill, and therefore if you are skilled, you don’t lose. He’s been doing it for years and says he’s reached an advanced level where he makes money, but never plays higher stakes than he can afford so it’s not risky.
I’ve agreed to spend some time with him getting informed about the game and how he manages the risk element – balancing wins and loses (he admits he sometimes loses but says that his funds always balance out long term and ultimately he’s making a lot of money) but the bottom line is that he seems to be saying he’s not willing to stop, it’s a case of me getting used to the idea. Hmm. I’m not sure this is going to happen!

[Author]

Posts