[LoveCows]

I thank you for your support and advice it is much appreciated. We have tried to find support before but the addresses for meeting when we went were empty. No one answered the phone. We live rurally so a support group would be too far to travel. I do ignore his threats now, last time I was sleeping in with the baby. Had a cranky night up with him. And he woke me up and started threatening various things I tried to go back to sleep and he kept at it for a bit then went away. His manipulation s are no longer working on me and he seems to be getting more distant. When he has time off work he’s barely paying attention to me or his son. On his phone, computer ect. I do want to leave, and hope he will seek help with me no longer there. At times I feel my very presence enables him. He may just gamble himself into a hole and then his mother will most likely bail him out and buy him a ticket home to Belarus. We went on holiday there once, and he stole my bank card and gambled our return ticket funds away. I didn’t know because my bank wouldn’t let me into my accounts so look at them. He would put the card back into my wallet before I woke up. I cannot leave immediately. I need to save and find places to move my animals to I looked at the numbers, I seem to be obsessed with budgets and money I will not have enough for a year. A lot can happen in a year. I am thinking about selling some things to make up the money. Childcare makes working a non option as it is far too expensive. So I am stuck. And I think he knows it. I am a bit worried at what will happen when he needs to gamble again. I will not give up the savings, his credit score is OK so he could take out loans…. The repayment would cripple us.

[LoveCows]

My husband ran out of money so now he’s acting all sweet and as if nothing is wrong. He is foreign Russian is his first language. He uses it to hide his goings on. I do understand a lot more than he thinks. He is on a gamblers forum in Russian site. To be honest I think they just taught him new ways of being sneaky with money. He took out loans after being on this forum. He is now blaming me for our financial situation. And threatening things like he usually does e.g killing our livestock so he can eat them. We are farmers. And have a small amount of animals e.d chickens, ducks, goats, and I just invested in some stud quality cows to breed and sell from. This was before I knew the extent of his hole digging. They are in my name only. I am trying to build a business and future for our son but he is incapable of planning for the future. I do not currently work, as our son is under one year and I cannot stand the thought of day care. And it’s also very expensive around here.

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