[lizbeth4]

I gave up my part time job as I have my Granddaughter full time now. No time for a part time job! My youngest Daughter has only me to vent to. So that is Ok! She had to take her 36 hour break and will be on the road again tommorow.
We have the veggie garden planted. Some of the plants look sad but I hope they take. We were both a dirty mess! But it was fun!
No gambling thoughts or urges today. We are watching a movie together and snuggling.

[lizbeth4]

I did my major grocery shopping and filled up the pantry for another month. I have the organic soil and vegetable plants. This weekend will be spent outside planting. My Granddaughter will have fun getting dirty!
My youngest Daughter video chatted with me today. She was upset as her first drop off took too long to be unloaded. This set off a chain reaction resulting in the next 2 loads being late! She wasn’t in trouble but she really was stressed out. Her supervisor suggested that she unwind and relax the rest of the day. She made it through.
I did think about gambling today. But I didn’t act on it. Having my Granddaughter has helped me!!
Have a great gamble free weekend everyone!

[lizbeth4]

The washer is up and running. Not too expensive of a fix. No other extras this month but that’s ok. I made it through the day without thinking about gambling. My Granddaughter is napping so I have some ME time!
Talked to my Youngest daughter today. She is traveling to her 3rd state in 4 days. She really, really, likes her job. I’m so happy for her!!!
Going grocery shopping tomorrow and to our local nursery to get my stuff for my vegetable garden. I’m really excited about the garden. My Granddaughter can help me with the planting and watering. My strawberries are blooming and my peach tree is loaded with buds. There’s nothing like fresh veggies and fruit. Life is good!

[lizbeth4]

You’re not alone! Literally, this site kept me from committing suicide! I had just returned home from the casino after losing the last of my money. I found this site and connected to some great, supportive people here.
Keep using the advice you’ve heard in chat. Everyone here is very supportive and we all care. It’s a struggle but we all deserve a,gamble free life. Take care.

[lizbeth4]

Especially with a 2 year old, I need a washing machine! Either it will get fixed tomorrow or I will have to purchase a new one. I found some used ones in town but no delivery. I haven’t a truck besides I need it set up and the old one hauled off.
The car can wait. I’m not planning on going out of town and everything is 10 mins from me. Only 5 stop lights in my town. I’ve also found 2 different mechanics who work independently not with a company. They come highly recommended and are probably cheaper than the big guys. OPTIONS!
I’m definitely not going to let stress and anxiety to take me back down the GAMBLING ROAD!

[lizbeth4]

That’s concerning that you have had 2 falls so close together. I would be watchful. Falling is the number 1 cause of accidents in our age group. Take care.

[lizbeth4]

Washer went out! Repairman coming tomorrow. Maybe it has a little life left in it. LOL! I also haven’t addressed the small leak from my car or have taken it to the shop for a estimate on tires and brakes. No money alloted! Taking deep breaths. This too shall pass.
For a moment this morning, as the washer wouldn’t go into the rinse cycle, I THOUGHT ABOUT GAMBLING!! Those same thoughts which have caused me problems in the past. I pushed the thoughts out of my head. NO, NO, I CAN’T RELIVE IT AGAIN. I’M MOVING FORWARD AND DEALING WITH LIFE!

[lizbeth4]

Congrats on your GF time! I understand that things are rough on you now! Hang in there! Do you think that your DR is doing everything he or she can for you? Any doubts, I would try another DR. I’m just speaking from experience.
Try to find 1 positive thing everyday to focus on. It could be simply the weather, a flower or your favorite TV show. It can help get you through the day.
Do you have any support, family or friends? We all know how important that is.
I will be thinking of you and praying that your situation improves. Take care.

[lizbeth4]

“You must find the place within yourself where nothing is impossible. ” Unknown

[lizbeth4]

My Sister is here finishing a home project for our Mother. My Granddaughter and I spent a few hours visiting today My Mom and Sister went to the casino and surprisingly didn’t stay long. She text me that they lost real fast and she talked Mom out of putting anymore money into the machines. It didn’t trigger any urges.
I’m exhausted! My Granddaughter never stops unless she is sleeping. LOL!
We are starting our vegetable garden next weekend. I have to get the raised beds prepared.
My Daughter is driving solo. She is keeping in touch and seems to be doing well.
Working on some personal issues. I can’t ever gamble again!

[lizbeth4]

I get up early every morning to have some ME time before my Granddaughter awakes! I meditate and say my morning prayer and daily affirmations. If I’m lucky, I have time to also do a load of laundry or straighten up a little. LOL!
No plans today! Just going to hang out with my Granddaughter and enjoy the beautiful weather.
There’s always something to be grateful for.

[lizbeth4]

My Daughter will be leaving on Saturday. Doesn’t know her destination yet. She is currently getting her supplies together.
Last night was another hard one with my Granddaughter. Her sleep pattern is off. So it was a long night. Not gambling enables me to be present and here to deal with everything.
Today I am grateful for my health. It is my number 1 priority. Living with a heart condition and experiencing a heart attack at 51 years old opened my eyes. I take nothing health wise for granted. I take my medications, exercise and get my yearly physical and see my cardiologist once a year.
I’m also grateful as I have awesome Daughters and Grandkids. We’ve been through so much but have all came out of our storms intact and stronger than before.
So, don’t ever give up on yourselves or the people you love. I truly believe that any addiction can be overcome with faith, love and hard work!!! Have a awesome gamble free weekend everyone!

[lizbeth4]

My Daughter passed her written test this morning. YEAH! She gets her truck in 2 hours then will get further instructions on when and where she goes. So happy that’s all over! Now the adventure begins.

[lizbeth4]

Thanks for your post! I am up to watching my Granddaughter. It’s just hard work and she is a very headstrong child. Im not getting enough sleep and I really need to drop some pounds.
Hence taking a walk today. My Daughter passed the driving and parking parts of the test. She has to pass the written test. No other options.
I’m not a giver upper and I persist until I succeed, fail or drop. LOL. Really! I have no options either.
About the loneliness, I felt that way when I was married. I don’t mind being alone and like it but there are times when I need to be around people. It’s seems like I’m a bit isolated right now. My Granddaughter’s needs come first. I will survive.

[lizbeth4]

So far today, it’s not been a good day. I’ve questioned myself on if I’m really up to taking care of my Granddaughter for a year. The terrible twos are awful. It just really got to me today. We are home now from the library and park. She had many meltdowns. She doesn’t like the stroller but I did get a 3 mile walk in. And I need the exercise. I’m regrouping now! My Daughter failed the written test and has to retake it tomorrow. Her driving and parking test are later today. I don’t know why she failed the written test. She’s come too far to not make it! I feel alone a lot. I’ve always had that issue even when I’ve had someone near me. I guess everyone has their own battles and hang ups to overcome. I’m not gambling! That’s a biggie for me. No urges.

[Author]

Posts