[lizbeth4]

Early this morning we were graced with a mother and baby elk coming up from the pond area and walking down our street. They eventually ended up going in between my Mom’s and her neighbor’s houses to return to the forest. Beautiful! It makes me more grateful for where I live! How awesome is that?
My Daughter will be home on Saturday. I purchased foods to make her favorite meal and dessert. My next door neighbor watched my Granddaughter again while I shopped. She is a God sent. We’ve become fast friends. We have a lot in common.
Things are falling into place. My Granddaughter’s sleep times are getting more normal so I am getting sleep also! There’s a art class for 2-4 year olds starting next month. I’m going to enroll her. We are going to the library once a week for story time. She’s getting better about staying seated.
Gambling-no urges! But I’m not getting complacent. I know the thpughts can manifest anytime. I’m not cured! I’m learning how to deal with issues more productively. I’m finally changing the way that I handle stress and anxiety. I feel so much better about myself!!

[lizbeth4]

Winding down the day. Just enjoying life! Yesterday after the rain we played in rain puddles and had a blast! No gambling thoughts.
Today a man fell asleep at the wheel and rear ended my truck driver Daughter’s truck. He had to be taken to the hospital. My Daughter wasn’t hurt, just shaken up. There was minimal damage to her truck. I keep encouraging her as I don’t want her to give up what she likes doing. First the DUI driver. Now this! I’m glad she will be home soon.
I feel like I’m getting stronger everyday with my recovery. It seems like everything is falling into place. I feel like my life is pretty much on track. I’m dealing with the same family issues, ect. That hasn’t changed but the way that I’m handling them is. I’m getting better about setting boundaries and walking away from the nonsense. It makes for a better, happier me!

[lizbeth4]

Thanks for your supportive post! Yes, I did feel like I was missing out on the fun when my Mom and Sister went to the casino twice. They lost the first day and won the next time. But my Sister said the win didn’t cover her losses. And that’s how it goes. We both know that!
I haven’t been really counting my gamble free time. Just getting through the days. I’ve been a bit depressed lately. Between my Granddaughter’s sleep times and my insomnia, I think it is sleep related. My Granddaughter’s sleep times are getting better as I wake her at a certain time in the morning and put her down for a nap and at night at the same times. I may ber able to take a forth of a sleeping pill soon to aid in my sleep.
Thanks RG for your support! I know that you can be gamble free also. You can do it! You are going to group and getting support from the counselor. You are taking the right steps in recovery. Be proud of yourself!

[lizbeth4]

Trying to get my Granddaughter on a sleeping schedule again. We are a little off track from having visitors. This coming Friday mt Daughter will be here for 3 1/2 days so I’ll have a little break. My Sister will also be here at the same time for 2 days. Today, I cleaned and did laundry and played with my Granddaughter. She’s napping now. I promised a happy meal (treat) when she wakes. I was very tempted to gamble while my Sister was here. She and my Mom went twice to the casino and I guess it triggered urges. I didn’t act on them. My focus is on my Granddaughter and home projects. I have the tree guy coming back in 2 weeks to trim the backyard trees and the handyman coming next month to do 2 home projects. It’s exciting to see things completed. I won’t let gambling to take anything else from Me! I’m the one in control.

[lizbeth4]

Hang in there! There are underlying reasons that we gamble. From my experience, when we deal with these issues, we can deal more clearly with the gambling addiction.
I’m very sorry that you are in a abusive relationship. We all need some kind of support. Maybe you could rethink gamblers anon.
Remember to take care of yourself. Any act of self care is essential.
3 years will go by fast in your debt repayment. Just don’t add to that debt!
You are not alone. Please keep posting.

[lizbeth4]

I’m so happy about the internet. My Granddaughter has watched a Barbie mermaid movie several times now! LOL! All family members have gone home. My Sister left today. My youngest Daughter and Sister will be back towards the end of the month. Time to get back to our schedule.
There were 3 elk hanging out at the pond again today. I could see them from my living room window. My oldest Daughter and Grandson are nature lovers. They do a lot of camping, hiking. They were ecstatic to be able to get that close to the elk.
I collected many geodes for my Grandson and a few for myself. RG, they are beautiful! Wish I could give you some.
It is unseasonably hot here but it cools down at night. My air conditioning kicks on a lot during the day. Many people here only have swamp or window units. It’s our monsoon season so we will be getting rain storms in the evenings for the next few months.
I bought a nice bistro set for my outside patio area. I can enjoy my tea in the morning there! Next month my back yard trees are getting trimmed and some fence pickets are getting replaced. My front porch is getting restrained and sealed. All of this is possible because I’m not gambling! I love the results.
RG, I posted on your thread but I want to tell you that I’m proud of you!! You are taking all the steps to help yourself to stop gambling. It isn’t easy but I know you can do this!!!

[lizbeth4]

My weekend was AWESOME! My Daughter and Grandson came without her boyfriend as he had to work. They even stayed a extra night and left this afternoon. My Sister came yesterday so we had pizza together. The roast ect…was a hit!
My Mom is okay. She is so passive aggressive it’s ridiculous. I just ignore it! My Granddaughter’s sleep times have been good the last 4 days. Yeah!
My Sister and I are going hiking tomorrow. We are going to look for geods and raw crystals. Exciting!
My Daughter and Grandson went on a night hike around the pond across from my house. They sat about 4 feet from 2 hugh Elks for quite a while. Probably the same 2 Elks that hang out on our neighborhood. My Grandson is about a head taller than me now! Where did the time go to?
I have internet now!!!! So exciting!
RG, I’m so happy that you made it through the weekend! You can do this! I hope you have a great week also!!

[lizbeth4]

RG, thank you for your support. Even when you are going through things you still have time to be supportive. I truly appreciate it!! And I want nothing but the best for you. Hang in there!
I’m up early, put a roast and veggies in the slow cooker and made a nice tossed salad. My oldest Daughter, Grandson and her boyfriend will be here this afternoon. I haven’t seen them for awhile and I’m excited to spend a little time with them!
The last 3 days, my Granddaughter has been on a regular sleep schedule. Oh, it’s helped enormously with my daily functioning. I think that her living here is going to be more long term than 1 year. My Daughter has to pay back the school, ect…before she can save money for a down payment on a house. It’s Ok!
I have so much to be grateful for! Not gambling makes life so much more enjoyable and I’m living in the present. I get to enjoy my family and all the memories. I don’t take anything for granted anymore. Have a great weekend everyone.

[lizbeth4]

Today was a blah day! Don’t know why but I didn’t want to do anything and I accomplished very little. No energy! My Granddaughter and I just stayed home. I played with her and we did our usual daily routine.
I bought a projector/music thing for my Granddaughter thinking it would help her relax at bedtime. No! She wanted to catch and touch the stars and moon. LOL!
My oldest Daughter and my Grandson are coming for a visit this weekend. I’m so happy! I’m going to put a roast and veggies in the crockpot. We will be playing board games. Fun!
I’m present and participating with my children and Grandchildren. Gambling took me away from them. No more!

[lizbeth4]

So today RG I did something for me. I ordered internet. I haven’t had it for 16 months! OMG!! It’s been that long? The 15th it will be installed. I can stream my Netflix and Amazon prime again. I got a great deal also! So, instead of gambling I did something for myself. May sound trivial but I’m excited!!!!
Thanks ladies for your support and advice! RG, I know you can do this. Anything it takes to make it harder to gamble. I know you felt humiliated but it’s something that’s for your own good!!! Hang in there. I know that I’m not missing anything at the casino. Same thing, only a different day.
Kathryn, my Granddaughter has kept me from gambling many times! We need each other! She climbs onto everything. Just like her Mommy did! Isn’t it amazing how much they learn every day? My Granddaughter just soaks everything up. She’s asking me why and what I’m doing all the time. I just love her!

[lizbeth4]

Last night I had strong gambling urges! I will not stoop that low to get a babysitter so I can gamble. Today the urges have lessen but are still there. Working through them!
I’ve been able to purchase a few more items for my home. I keep looking around me at the improvements I’ve made and know the only reason it’s happened is because I’m not gambling. My debts are falling off and I’m in a real good place right now. I can’t ruin everything now.

[lizbeth4]

Yesterday the handyman came and my outside light that was plowed down, works again. He assembled the bookcase/cabinet and anchored it to the wall. I have all of my Grandson’ s Lego pieces displayed in it! Getting things done around the house.
My neighbor watched my Granddaughter yesterday while I went to the library. My Granddaughter loves her and she is patient and likes children.
I haven’t had any gambling thoughts. I’m seeing the results of not gambling. My life is more positive.

[lizbeth4]

Today got worse instead of better! I am battling through it all and even without a gambling thought. I feel good about that! My new next door neighbor and I have already formed a friendship. She has a positive and encouraging personality. She loves my Granddaughter and is always bringing over fresh fruits and veggies for her. It helps to have someone to talk to as I usually converse with a 2 year old all day. LOL. She just has good energy. Glad she moved next door.

[lizbeth4]

Good job. I think we can rewire our brains to break the gambling. Stay strong and make healthy choices. You can do it!!

[lizbeth4]

It’s funny how things can change so much in a day. I’m feeling depressed because of a few things that have happened in the last 24 hours. Things outside my realm but that effect me. I know that I have the power to say no to anything that I don’t want to do but I feel like I’m being put on the spot! I keep reminding myself about boundaries. It’s hard when someone you love keeps asking for help! I don’t think this person is being honest with me. But it hurts as they seem desperate! On a lighter note. My Granddaughter loved the fireworks which we watched from our front porch. She kept saying, it’s Christmas. LOL! The 2’s are hard. Crying for no reason. Getting into everything! But it’s a time for learning and growing and hugs and kisses. It’s testing my patience but I’m hanging in there. Gambling, I’ve thought about it but haven’t acted on it. My Granddaughter is my focal point right now !

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