[lizbeth4]

So, I am in the city as planned to take my Grandson to take the gifted test for school both today and tomorrow. I woke yesterday with a bad cold. Feeling yucky. I am very concerned for my youngest Daughter. She has text me a few times saying that she doesn’t want to live because her boyfriend dumped her. I called her and we had a long conversation. He sat in my home recently with this long sincere speach how they needed to get clean and how much he loved her. He is a manipulator and the relationship is toxic. I just don’t like that kind of talking as it is real concerning to me. How can I reinforce to my Daughter that she is worth so much more than this man when she is strung out on drugs??? Very sad.

[lizbeth4]

My Daughter white knuckled it all this evening and she couldn’t take it anymore and she asked me to take her back to the city. Ordinarily, I would have begged and said almost anything to keep her here but I knew it wouldn’t change anything. We packed up her stuff in the car and I took her to the city and left her at a friend’s house. Before I left, I hugged her and held her so tight. I didn’t want to let her go!!! We both cried. I told her that I was here for her and to not give up on herself. My heart feels so sad and heavy. I said that I wouldn’t be upset if she didn’t follow through with the detox, but I cried all the way home. I kept thinking of all the bad things that can happen to her. I am so emotionally drained!! I HATE ADDICTIONS!!! WHY????? I am praying that God will look after her!!!!

[lizbeth4]

Hi Cat, Thank you for your supportive post. I cried also when my Daughter showed up here asking for my help. I am happy to hear that your Husband is trying to fight his addiction also. I don’t have any expectations like I have in the past because it hurts so much when things don’t happen the way you want them to. But I have hope!! I am taking good care of her, feeding her well and giving her vitamins and telling her how much I love her and holding her in my arms. I am praying for her to be strong enough this time and to want to be sober and to follow through this time. All we can to is live one day at a time. Take care Cat!!

[lizbeth4]

Hi P, Thank you for your supportive post. We’ve all made mistakes in our lives and we can’t go back and change them or the past. I think you are a very strong person, more than you give yourself credit for. Keep fighting the fight!!! I am here to always support you like you have done for me.

[lizbeth4]

Thanks P and Cat for your support. My daughter woke and went to the post office with me and we cleaned my car. We had a good lunch. She came home and went back to bed. She was real cranky with me but I already knew that would happen once the drugs started getting out of her system. It is going to get worse before it gets better. Her boyfriend called and she wasn’t too happy with him. I don’t know what is going on there. I bought her some vitamins and she is taking them and I went grocery shopping and she has everything she asked for to eat. I am praying for the best!! There is a strawberry festival this weekend in a nearby town. My Mother and I are going to it tomorrow. My Daughter probably won’t feel up to it and that is okay as she can sleep while I am gone. I am feeling a little stressed but I am sleeping well and taking care of myself. I am praying that this is the time she follows through with her fight against her addiction.

[lizbeth4]

Thanks Ican for your post! 2 nights ago my youngest daughter and her boyfriend showed up at my home. They both want to detox from the drugs. They know they can’t do it together. He went back to the city and she stayed here with me. This is only the first step but at least she is trying. We have been down this road about 7 times before and she has always relapsed but that is normal. It takes us a while to get it. She is sleeping a lot but the next days will be the hardest. She will be mostly sleeping and I can tell she is getting more irritable. This time she knows she needs meetings and counseling too. I have prior appointments in the city next week and I will be gone for 2 1/2 days. She will go to my Mother’s house and stay. We talked to my Mom and she is on board to help in anyway she can. I am so thankful that she is wanting to get clean. I am trying not to put any expectations on this as I know it can go the other way real fast. She can leave at any time. But for now she is here and trying. That’s all I can ask for.

[lizbeth4]

Hi Carole, I understand the stress concerning your Mother’s health. That is good that you are moving in with her till she can move to her new home. One day at a time!

[lizbeth4]

Hi ICAN, Thanks for your post. I am happy that you had a good birthday. Remember that we can’t change the past only the future. Let go of the your last gamble and learn from it and move on!!! Don’t keep beating yourself up!! We learn from our mistakes. Take care.

[lizbeth4]

Hi Carole, I’m sorry to hear about your Mother. Our trip can wait if needed so you can take care of business. I don’t know how it works were you live but in the states we have something called medical power of attorney. It gives the person named in the document the power to make decisions regarding the other person. My Mother has one for herself which names me as the person that can make decisions for her. I had one with my Husband. With all the falls you Mother has experienced, I hope the hospital doesn’t release her to go back home. She does need constant care. Don’t let this and all of your responsibilities at home stress you out too much!!! Remember to take care of yourself. I am thinking of you!!

[lizbeth4]

P, Keep looking at the good things in your life. Things will improve and life will get better. Take care.

[lizbeth4]

I haven’t been doing anything real exciting the last few days. I am working out every morning which is good and today I attended a learn and luncheon hosted by my realtor. It was interesting as they talked about the different financing available and I learned a few things. They also had a credit repair person there and I learned a few new things there also. There was only 8 people in attendance. They offer 1 class a month/free. I felt good that I went and talked to some new persons. Tomorrow I am getting a mani/pedi, long overdue. I made appointments for my yearly physcial and my yearly with the cardiologist also. So, I guess I have been busy and productive. I am watering my front and side yards now. I haven’t had any gambling for the last few days. Believe me they do come and go!! I think it is easier for me to squash the urges as time goes by!! I hope everyone has had a great gamble free day!!!

[lizbeth4]

P, I just posted on your new thread. Keep trying!!! I read my last post and I it made me sad and it made me put things into prospective about my family. There are some real big issues there. Things that some of my family say to each other wouldn’t be tolerated if a stranger was saying them. I don’t have to tolerate that bad behavior as I am a adult now, not a child. My Mother has a uncontrollable temper and has fits of rage. I will walk away from here when she acts inappropriately She will not change. Everything is someone else’s fault with her as with my Sister. I think it is the easy way out in not accepting being at fault. Very unhealthy. I mourn what I won’t have: a healthy relationship with my Mother and Sister. I can sit and cry and keep having my pity parties or I can do something about it. I am determined to live a healthy life. I will have superficial relationships with them but I will have my boundaries up. I am lucky to have good friends and my daughters and grandson. I feel blessed!

[lizbeth4]

Hi P, Is there anything else you could try to help you stop gambling? Are all your barriers in place?? Are the support groups and counselors you are seeing the right ones for you? I know you feel defeated right now but don’t give up on yourself. P, look at the good things in your life. I know that sometimes that is hard to do when you are feeling down. I know that you have talked about not having much family support and I get that as I am in the same boat. We can’t change that. But look at all the friends and support that you have here. Although we haven’t met in person, I care about you and want the best for you. You can get through this. Look for the good things in your life to give you strength. Take care.

[lizbeth4]

I need to gripe and get things off of my chest so I can move on. My day started off well, I picked my Mother up and we went to the farmer’s market. It was small but awesome. I bought the best tamales there. We returned to my Mother’s house had lunch. She kept mentioning the casino and when were we going?? I told her that I wasn’t going to the casino. Anyways, we ended up going to the grocery store as I invited her to lunch tomorrow and I needed a few things. She stood in back of a car that was trying to back out and I asked her if she didn’t see the car. She took her purse and slammed it in the cart and had the most evil look on her face. I asked her what was wrong? She screamed that she was tired of me being on her back. Well, we made it through the store and I took her home. She tried to talk to me on the way home, like nothing was wrong. I couldn’t even talk to her. I couldn’t get out of there fast enough. She had been going on earlier about her neighbor, complaining about really little things. She was getting more and more mad. I asked her if that impacted her life and she said it didn’t but that they were wrong. OMG!!! I am proud of myself that I didn’t get into a screaming match with her. She is so mean and judgemental about everyone!!! I think the real story is that she wanted me to take her to the casino. It’s not going to happen!!! Why would you want to encourage your daughter to do something that she has a addiction to??? I DIDN’T GAMBLE!!!

[lizbeth4]

Hi Carole, I agree, I wish this was all a bad dream and too!!! All we can to is be supportive to Ken and his family. I can’t even imagine the pain that they are going through.

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