[lizbeth4]

Thanks P for your post!! I have been okay in the gambling urges department today!!! I am in the city because I have a cardiologist appointment tomorrow. I will go home on Thursday. I picked up my Grandson from camp today and he and I went to a pizza place and had dinner and played games. I will know everything about the house situation by the end of this week. I think I am drained from all of this chaos already. The heat here doesn’t make things any better. I am glad to see my Daughter’s and Grandson but will be glad to go home on Thursday to cooler weather. There was a small brush fire burning about 50 miles from my home. It was under control and the firefighter’s were letting it burn out. There was so much smoke in the air and it irritated my eyes. The smoke is really bad for anyone with a respiratory condition. I tried to get my Mom and her little dog to come to the city with me and we would get a hotel room for a few days to get out of it but she said no. Anyways, every time I come to the city, I am grateful that I live in a more remote area. I have my little piece of heaven in my home and yard. I am very grateful indeed.

[lizbeth4]

I thought of GAMBLING today!!! I know one of my triggers is stress!! I am feeling a lot of that lately with the purchase of the home and issues that we are dealing with. Also, the time frames with the loan. My Realtor came to my house today and we discussed everything. Like I said before, either the seller will give me credit for the fixes or I will walk away. I will walk away if the fixes are major issues. I had to rationally think about why I was having urges to gamble and if that was going to change anything positively for me. NO it isn’t. I will feel a short-lived relief in gambling but feel bad afterwards and be very disappointed with myself. So, I am learning the consequence of my actions and I will not gamble today!!!!!

[lizbeth4]

Hi Carole, I have seen your home (very lovely) and there is a lot of space to clean. It is a full time job!!!! Please don’t let Danny treat you less than equal to him. You have a lot of responsibility in running both homes, your rental and your home. You do alot!!! I thought that maybe Danny learned his lesson when you left for awhile. I agree with you. You should get all your ducks in a row before you leave again. I know what you are saying regarding Danny financial control but you are bringing in money with the renters and are in charge of the home. It’s hard finding a job when you are older. I know there is a lot of age discrimination out there for people are age. Really sad as we have a lot to offer!! Hang in there and don’t lose yourself. Remember that you deserve someone who cherishes you!!!!! Take care, friend.

[lizbeth4]

Well, things didn’t go as planned today. I woke with a massive headache. I don’t get them often but when I do they can take days to go away. The storage shed cleaning will wait till another day!! House update: My Realtor is back. We have a extension on the inspection date. A roofing contractor is coming out to give us a estimate on repairs. The seller is having the gas turned on and the original home inspector is coming back out on Wednesday (at sellers cost) to inspect the heater and water heater (gas). I am feeling better about it all. Then we can respond on what needs to be addressed. Hopefully, I will be offered credit for the repairs as it more feasible for me to have the repairs done so we can proceed with the loan. The loan process is going well. We are on top of everything. So, I am hopeful that all will go well.

[lizbeth4]

Hi Vera, My Mother won’t talk to a counselor or get any help for her gambling. I was surprised that she opened up to me. I am being supportive but I have been there and I know how hard it is in the beginning. She made the first and biggest step in admitting she has a problem (in a round about way). She told my cousin who is coming for a visit that she would not be going to the casino. Good for her!!! She told me yesterday that she could go back to the casino in October as she will be financially straighten out by then. I know that this addiction plays mind games with you. I am basically listening to her and not trying to give too much of my input as she takes it as someone telling her what to do. I thought of taking her my GA handbook so she could read it but maybe that would be too much for her to handle???? I am walking a fine line with her. I can tell she is getting antsy and irritable. Today I have a few errands to take care of and then I am going to reorganize my clothes closet. Tomorrow I plan on taking everything out of my storage shed and cleaning it out. Nothing else going on with the house. I am waiting for my Realtor to come back so we can address the roof issues. I guess this is a common finding in a lot of home inspections. It is what it is!!! We are compiling another list of homes in case we don’t get a remedy. I am less stressed about the situation and when I find stress level rising, I am taking deep breaths and calming myself down. One day at a time.

[lizbeth4]

Thanks Cat for your post. Your posts are always supportive and calming to me. Thanks! I did better today. I spent most of the day making phone calls for further documentation that is needed by the lenders and emailing the loan processor. I talked to my Realtor’s assistant and she has the inspection report and will address the roof issues next week when she is back from vacation. They will either fix it or I will walk away from the deal and move forward to find another home. Cat, stress is always a trigger for me but I was able to work through the urges and not gamble!! My Mother has cleaned her home and storage shed from top to bottom. She is white knuckling it right now. She talked about gambling today and I changed the subject. She is having a tough time. She will receive her check next week and I am praying that she will not gamble. A massage sounds good right now. I think that I am going to soak in the tub tonight. I know that I took my anger (from gambling) out on my Husband. I feel so bad about that now!! I text my youngest Daughter today to tell her that I loved her. She is so far gone with the drugs. It is scary! I can’t help her till she wants to help herself. It’s just tough watching your child self destruct. I can only tell her how much she is loved and pray that she will find her way. I am not giving up!!

[lizbeth4]

Today was so hectic, busy. My Mom and I went to a notary and had our wills, living wills, power of attorneys, ect, witnessed and notarized. I am glad it is done as I learned from my Husband’s death that you need to have all your affairs in order. I did fix a good lunch for us afterwards. The rest of the day was a blur and I had quite the headache. The home inspection results, some minor things that can be fixed easily, a major ROOF ISSUE. My Realtor isn’t back from vacation till Saturday. It was recommended that I get a roof inspector out so he can determine the costs. Either the seller will compensate the fix with a price reduction in the home or I will have to walk away. I have a list of additional paperwork that the mortgage company is requesting. I knew that would happen but my head was on overload today. I had to keep telling myself to take deep breaths and calm down. In the midst of all of this chaos, I thought about GAMBLING!!! DAH!! Really? I had strong urges but I resisted and didn’t gamble. Oh, a cool thing happened today, my Mother asked me to help her by reminding her that she didn’t need to go to the casino. She admitted that she is going too often and spending quite a bit of money. I told her that we would help each other and that if we were having urges, we would talk to the other person and get support from each other. It’s the first step for her!!! I am confident that everything will work out with the house.

[lizbeth4]

Good to see you post!! I’m glad that you had the test and had the polps removed. No it isn’t antifreeze or you wouldn’t have woken up!!! Oh, that stuff is so nasty to drink. I am sure that you are glad that it is over. Yeah, plan a trip for you!!! I am just going to be so busy and I have some things to tend to in my own home. We will get together!!!! Take care.

[lizbeth4]

Thanks Ican and Vera for your posts. I had to think about whether I wanted to purchase another home. I figured it this way, I am set as I don’t have a house payment or any debt. My Daughter has come a long way and I feel like she and my Grandson deserve some help in buying a home. Vera, she can’t be on the title as she can’t qualify for a loan. (some credit issues). The home will be in my name for now. She is working on cleaning up her credit. We are hoping that in a few years we can refinance and she can be added to the loan. I am having the home inspection and termite inspection tomorrow afternoon. I am hoping that all is good or I will find out tomorrow. Tomorrow, my Mom and I are going to get our will, power of attorney, ect.. that I had drawn up for us, notorized and witnessed. I am going to make us lunch, salmon, salad, and asparagus. I’m trying to eat healthy again. It rained last night and today. Lovely weather.

[lizbeth4]

Hi Carole, I was just thinking of you and wondering how you are. Please post when you have the time. I don’t think that I am going to be able to go on a trip in September. We just received a acceptance on a home. Now we are going to have inspections, ect.. plus the packing and moving. I know, I could leave that to my Daughter but I want to be part of the process with her and my Grandson. Nothing is better than seeing the smiles on their faces. Take care.

[lizbeth4]

RG, you beat me to Cat’s thread. Cat thanks for your post. I know I am going on about things like the house. Many people here probably don’t care to hear about things like that. I post what is going on with my life and affecting it. Everything plays a role in our life and how we react to things, good and bad. I agree with you that my Mother has a depression issue, but she chooses not to address it. She also refuses to get any help. I think that when you retire, you will have more energy. You can set your own schedule. You will love it!!! Take care.

[lizbeth4]

Thanks Cat for your post!!! We got the house!! My Realtor left this morning for a 4 day vacation and called me at 6:30 am. There was multiple offers on the home. The selling Realtor works for the same company as she does. I had to come in $2,000 more and change the inspection date and closing date. I think it is worth it!!! I had to go over and sign the purchase contract as her assistant is helping me till she gets back. Cat, sometimes I don’t know if I am coming or going. I will be glad when my Daughter and Grandson are settled in their new home as I want to be home more than 4 days or less at a time. I have things that I would like to do around here. I still have a few boxes to go through with my move. LOL!!! My Mother does suffer from depression. She refuses to seek help. Today when I told her we had the home she said, if that’s what you want. There is no encouraging or happiness there. So, everyone around her has to deal or not with it. Kind of sad. I am glad that things are better with your Hubby. Life is complicated. My Daughter doesn’t have all the money for the down payment and closing costs, ect. But she did give me the check from her insurance settlement (car wreck) and so that will help in the costs. I had to think about whether I wanted to invest and buy this home and after thinking about it I decided it would be a good thing. Mostly, I decided it will be a home for my Daughter and Grandson, and they won’t have to be in another rental. Our world was rocked when my Husband died and I think that he would be happy that I am doing this. She will make the mortgage payments, ect… and if something should happen, she were to lose her job, I can affort the payments. I asked the sellers to purchase a home warranty (1st year) for me. I have that with my home. The service call is $60 and it covers virtually everything. Cat, I don’t work outside the home so I don’t have a schedule. That makes a big difference in my energy level. I think when you retire you will feel the difference. I am waiting for the list of home inspectors as I have 10 days instead of 15 days for the inspection to be done. So, there is still work to be done and a lot of packing. LOL!!!! We have been getting rain every evening, much need for the surrounding forest. I am going to chill the rest of the day as I have been stressed about the house deal. Everything is good!!!

[lizbeth4]

Baths

[lizbeth4]

Wow! We found a home and put a offer on it. I will know if the seller accepts by Monday afternoon. I was getting frustrated as 3/4 of my list of homes had been sold. My Daughter was on the internet this morning and 2 new homes were offered today. We choice one of those. It has been totally renovated inside and out. New kitchen cabinets, stainless steel appliances, granite countertops, new wood floors. 3 bedrooms, 2 bats. The downside is that it didn’t have a pool but it had a nice backyard where my Daughter can garden and my Grandson can play. I am keeping my fingers crossed that we get it!!!! My Grandson’s Uncle took him to his karat tournament and he is now a blue belt and he won his first trophy. He emailed us a picture of him and he had the biggest smile on his face!!!! We celebrated by going out for Mexican food. It has been a great day!!

[lizbeth4]

Okay, my day is not going so well. It is 24 degrees warmer here than where I live. I had to go buy a sun shield for my car. I bought water and ice and a small cooler for tomorrow. The Realtor called and 2 more houses have been sold from my list. I am not sure what tomorrow is going to bring as far as the houses we are going to look at. In about 1 hour, my ex-son-in-law and his brother are coming over to my Daughter’s apartment for pizza and my Grandson is going home with them to spend the night. House hunting is no place for a kid. I wouldn’t even go if I didn’t have to. LOL!!!! Okay, I am going to get positive about this!!!

[Author]

Posts