[lizbeth4]

I-did-it, I’ve just read your latest post and it was very uplifting and positive. Just what I needed right now. Self care is essential. Gambling takes away our self esteem and self respect. I hope to turn my gambling free days into many days like you have. Take care. Onwards and upwards!!!!

[lizbeth4]

Monicau, I’m sorry that you are feeling depressed. I don’t like hearing that you are hungry. I wish there was something i could do to help. Friends: we find out our true ones when we really need their friendship. I hope there is something positive in your day!

[lizbeth4]

Today I am crushed, sad. I’ve been crying and so heartbroken. My Mother unleashed on me again. This time was in front of my Daughter and Granddaughter. She told me to get my axx out of her house. I was told how terrible of a human being I am and she tried to demean me with horrid statements. She became aggressive and in my face. I am so sad. I have no bond with my Mother. I’m devastated! I won’t go back. As I live in a small town and down the street from her, maybe I should move back to the city. Of course, I won’t make any sudden decisions. I have to weigh everything. I have to investigate if I will be able to rent a apartment as my credit is poor. As much as i love it here, cutting myself off from her completely is what I need to do. Surprisingly, it didn’t trigger any gambling urges. I’m stronger than I thought!

[lizbeth4]

Hi. You’re not a fraud. We will never be able to control our gambling. Loneliness and boredom are triggers for me also. I’m trying to find hobbies that i can enjoy. Once winter is over here, I’m going to find a place to volunteer. Keeping busy=no gambling. Being broke and trying to get by till next payday is getting old! How about you. Interested in any hobbies??? Keep posting and stay strong!

[lizbeth4]

Thanks Velvet! My goals are obtainable and I’m excited to achieve them. It snowed a little yesterday and is cold here. Just enough snow to make the forest look beautiful. Although it’s only been a short time since I’ve gambled, I feel so good about it and don’t miss it at all. In fact, I feel relieved. A week from now I will be with my previous Grandson, creating memories. What could be better?

[lizbeth4]

Hi Monka, Banning, blocking, asking someone else to help with your money and hold your bank cards it will help deter you. It’s good that you are here on GT. You will have support and we all know where you are coming from. There are companies who will consolidate your payday loans and reduce the interest and making the payments more doable Been there, done that. You can consolidate other debts into one monthly payment. I’ve felt suicidal at times, usually after a gambling binge. But in reality, I just want to be free of the gambling and live in peace. Keep posting! Stay strong.

[lizbeth4]

PS: During my last gambling episode, I looked around. No one was smiling. The mood, atmosphere of the casino was sad. I sat there wondering how many people were spending money they couldn’t afford to lose? It made me sad. I don’t want to feel like that again!

[lizbeth4]

Peter, You are not stupid! You have a addiction. Tell yourself that this is the day that you stop gambling! Find other things to do. Help yourself by putting up barriers to make it harder to gamble. You deserve to be happy. Gambling doesn’t make us happy. I want the rest of my life to be happy and peaceful. You can have that too. There are online chat groups here that are very helpful. I’ve gone to GA meetings. Find support! Stay strong and keep posting.

[lizbeth4]

Last night I couldn’t sleep again. So, I looked up some verses in the Bible regarding money, worry. They helped to soothe me and I slept for a good 6 hours straight. I had the money to pay bills until I blew it on my last gambling episode. Why would I continue to fo this when I know the pain it causes? I’ve written down some goals for myself this year. All are obtainable if I don’t gamble. Today, I am posting online some items for sale. Hoping to make a little money. Next Sunday I will be in the city with my Grandson for 1 week while my Daughter is on a back packing trip. It will give him and I some bonding time. We are expecting some rain and snow this afternoon. Yuck!!!

[lizbeth4]

Hi Peter. You will get to the point where you can forgive yourself for the losses and move forward. It takes time! I’ve promised myself time and time again that I wouldn’t gamble but this last time really affected me in a good way. I believe it’s my last gambling episode. I’ve blamed God and others but now realize it’s all me. I was introduced to gambling on the horses by my Parents. Then when I turned 21, they took me to Las Vegas. That was the start of the madness. 39 years later I’m finally getting it. You can stop Now! Banning, barriers with money will help. Coming here was the first step. It’s a good start. Keep posting and stay strong. Anything is possible if we want it bad enough!

[lizbeth4]

I-did-it, Dave Ramsey’s financial advice is awesome. I’ve read several of his books. You could download on a kindle. I’m working on the emergency fund right now. I’ve often wondered about winning the lottery but I don’t play. I wouldn’t want a huge amount, just enough to be comfortable and travel and help my kids and Grandkids. I think too much money can be bad also. I guess theres nothing wrong with dreaming.

[lizbeth4]

That sounds like a plan. Pay the bills first! We never make money gambling. Any win is never enough. We keep chasing the win. You can do it. I’m doing it. I agree, the finances will straighten out if we stay strong.

[lizbeth4]

I had a restless night. Replaying things in my head. Omg! All of the stupid things I’ve done for gambling. I became someone I didn’t like or know. One thing I now realize , it’s never too late to turn your life around and stop the gambling, the madness. It may be hard to get out of debt and regain the trust of people you care about , but if you comitt to recovery, it is possible. I’m starting my new life! Exciting!

[lizbeth4]

I’m feeling anxious and stressed tonight. I have 2 high interest loans because of poor credit. And because of gambling. I have 1 more payment on one loan and 9 more payments on the other one. What a nightmare. So frustrating. Never again!!!! What a waste of money. I am just sick to my stomach. I have to let go of it but not make the same mistake again.

[lizbeth4]

Monicau, Thanks for your post. I feel like more job opportunities will be coming your way! I hope you have a good visit with your Daughter. Maybe you can get out of the house for awhile. When is your Son moving in? How is Pete acting? Sorry that our friends both had mixed reactions to our gambling addiction. You find out who your real friends are when you really need them. I hope you have a good day!

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