[lizbeth4]

Laura, I ‘ve given my worries about both of my Daughters over to God. They are going to have to learn from their mistakes. It does me more harm worrying. Not good for your health. The position I wanted is filled. Bummer! I spent the morning watering my garden and roses and enjoying my yard. I have strawberries already! I think my veggie garden is going to be awesome this year. I’ve been laxed on my morning walks but I’m starting again tomorrow. Persistance!!! My Sister will be here this weekend. Looking forward to spending time with her. I think I am going to break down and order internet soon. LOL! But I’m cutting the cable. I can live without it. My life is pretty peaceful these days. Just how I like it!

[lizbeth4]

Monica, I hope your first day of work is wonderful. I admire your resilience and motivation. It is very inspiring to me. I agree that how we are raised has great influence on our lives. Both positive and negative. Coming from a very dysfunctional childhood, the 3 most positive people in my life were my Grandmother, my 1st grade teacher, Mrs Noble and my 6th grade teacher, Mr Olsen. They taught me that I could achieve anything that I wanted to and to never give up! I think of them all often. You are turning everything around and you never give up. Those are great qualities to have. I wish you all the best as you truly deserve it!!

[lizbeth4]

Today I spent a few hours with my neighbor across the street from me. Her son passed away about 1 month ago. She is 80 years old but seems a lot younger. She was lonely and sad. I’ve only spoken with her a few times. It was meant for me to be there. I cried with her and gave her hugs. She said she felt much better when I was leaving. I want to help people. I know it sounds simplistic but I feel that is my calling. I’m going back to my last job interview place tomorrow as it was working with mentally disabled adults. I’m not sure why I wasn’t selected as they provide training but I’m going to try and get the position. Keep your fingers crossed for me.

[lizbeth4]

PS: I’ve paid 1/2 of my property taxes! Still waiting for my state tax refund which will pay the other half. It won’t go to savings as originally planned! But I am making progress on my debts.

[lizbeth4]

I-did-it, your ideas are greatly appreciated. I do a lot and I’m afraid of biting off more than I can chew. It would have to be part time work. I can make it on what I earn, debt repayment and all but I don’t have money to save for emergencies, ect… This bothers me greatly. My life is a little topsy turvy right now as my Daughter’s work hours fluctuate and my Mother’s forgetfulness is getting worse. But sometimes I just want to do what I think is best for me!!! But then I feel selfish. Ugh!!! Today I’ve watered my garden (looking good) and I’m doing some housekeeping. No urges but for some reason my sleeping pattern is off.

[lizbeth4]

Thanks Laura and I-did-it for your posts! I think I will appreciate my vegetable garden and fruit trees more this year as I am eating meat free. 8 months now! I can’t wait to taste it all! Although I am motivated to plant a garden, keep my yard and 13 rose bushes and flowering shrubs and trees healthy and to put my energy in my family, I find I have no motivation to get a job or volunteer. Something I should be doing. Honestly, I don’t want to interact with other people excluding friends and family. My friend circle has always been small but tight. I know I need to expand my horizons but it’s a hurdle that I’m having trouble with. Maybe it’s reflected in my last 2 job interviews. Maybe something negative is coming through to others. Something else to work on!!!! Growing takes work!

[lizbeth4]

Thanks Monica for your post! I treated myself to a new journal/diary today. I ordered it online. Monica, you gave me the idea in one of your posts! I think it will be very beneficial. Trying to get motivated this morning. I need more caffeine. LOL! Have a great gamble free weekend everyone!

[lizbeth4]

Today was a good day! First, I realized that I made the last payment on a high interest loan this month. That money can go to the new creditor. I will call them next week with a proposal. I purchased my vegetable seeds and plants. This weekend the garden will be planted. Exciting! I’ve had good success in the past. My strawberries are blooming and my peach and apple trees will be producing in a few months. It does save money, keeps me busy and tastes yummy! I’ve decided to go 1 more month without the internet! I’ve purchased some movies at a yard sale at $1 a piece. I’m reading more and getting things done around here. My Mother even complimented me on how good my front and back yards look. Next month I am going to start painting the inside of my house. Everything is white but a accent wall in my dining room. Time for change!!! I’m feeling very motivated. The fire here is 50% contained. The winds are bringing a lot of smoke into town. It was caused by a illegal campfire! Fire restrictions are in force!!! Being gamble free makes life a lot better! Time for more exciting things and goals!

[lizbeth4]

Hi Monica and thanks for your post. The rain and snow helped firefighters keep the fire from spreading. No more rain. In the forecast. Feeling better. Watching my Granddaughter a few hours this morning. Going to the store later for topsoil and seeds Time to plant my veggie garden. Something to keep me busy and to reap the benefits of fresh produce. I hope everyone has a great gamble free day!

[lizbeth4]

Oh Monica, great idea! I’m going to purchase a dairy. I used to journal everyday but stopped? Things do change when we get older. I felt that way during a couple of my job interviews. I felt that there was age discrimination. Anyways, you seem very upbeat and looking forward to your future. I hope everything works out with your Son moving in. Have a great day!

[lizbeth4]

Monica, thanks for your post! I’m so happy for you. I think that the tide has changed for you. You sound so optimistic about your new job and future. I think we’ve both have grown and changed. I hope to see future posts about your job. I’m sure it’s going to be strange without Pete living there. But it’s a new start for you. Change is hard but usually a good thing. Take care. I’m excited for you!!

[lizbeth4]

I believe my last gambling day was March 13th, 2018. A very significant date: the day after my Husbands death. I’m counting my gamble free time in months not days as it is easier for me to keep track of. I feel like my mindset has changed a lot. I find that I am changing and evolving in many ways. Good ways!! I had my overdue haircut yesterday and feel much better about myself. I noticed that when I gambled, I wouldn’t splurge on myself. We should be our first priority. How can we give our selves to others: family and friends, if we don’t care for ourselves? Last night was a mixture of snow and rain, making the firefighters jobs a little more manageable. More is in the forecast. Our Governor has declared a state of emergency. This will help to get more funding as there are more wildfires burning. I have a bit of a sore throat. Maybe the temperature change? I’m resting and watching 2 movies I bought from the sales bin at our local store. I’ve gamble free! I’m in control of my life and how I want the outcome to be.

[lizbeth4]

Today was payday and I’ve paid my bills and went grocery shopping. Later this afternoon I’m going to my hair appointment. Time for a cut. I bought some dye to color the grays!!! Feeling less anxious. Rain is in the forecast for this evening and tomorrow. The fire has destroyed homes and our Governor has declared a state of emergency. Scary stuff! It grounds you and makes you realize how precious everything is. Today I didn’t gamble!!

[lizbeth4]

I’m still feeling a little anxious. Tomorrow is payday. I’m going to pay my bills and buy groceries and then I will know how much I can offer my creditor. I had a amazing day yesterday watching my Granddaughter play in her pool. She’s such a delight. I’ll be watching her for a few hours today. I’ve packed my evacuation bag, gassed up the car and checked all the fluids as we are in fire season and currently have a fire burning 19 miles Northeast of us. Rain is in the forecast for Tuesday and Wednesday, and I pray for some relief for the firefighters. Today I’m going to find some peace and contentment and enjoy my Granddaughter.

[lizbeth4]

Thank you for your post on my thread. It’s people like you that help keep me grounded and going. I know we can achieve anything that we put our minds to. Congrats on your gamble free time.

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