[lizbeth4]

Thanks Laura for your supportive post. My refund will go for the final payment on my property taxes and my HOA fees for the year. I’m finding that I’m being more patient and understanding with my Mother. It’s hard to see her struggle with her words, ect. She’s getting so fragile. I had a stressful day. My Sister called and asked for a favor concerning her youngest adult Son. My Sister never asks for help. I was able to help but had a lot of running around to do but accomplished her request. She was so grateful. I’m mentally drained. But the stress didn’t trigger gambling thoughts.

[lizbeth4]

Today was a busy day! I did yard work, tended the garden. I sold some baby clothing and shoes she has outgrown. I sold a few of my items that were new with price tags as I waited too long to return and they didn’t fit properly. I briefly thought about gambling today but I refrained! I had lunch with my Mother and we played some games. My Sister is coming again for a visit this weekend. We’re planning on going to some yard sales and taking Mom to breakfast. Fun!!! Tomorrow will be spent painting the trim on the back of the house. I’ve marked off 2 home projects I’ve completed. I have many more! Keeps me busy and out of trouble.

[lizbeth4]

Thanks Monica for your post. I’m so happy that your life is going in a positive direction. You so deserve it! I’m cleaning and reorganizing my storage/workshop room. OMG! I’m crossing off items needed for my home projects as I have come across many items I didn’t know I had that were shoved back on the shelves. More money saved! I came across some old metal pieces and my mind went to what I could make out of them. I have some unique, cool ideas. I text my youngest Daughter last night and asked her if she needed any money. She said no as she is working and just received her tax refund. She wants to make it on her own. I told her I was so proud of her and I would always be there for support. My garden is going crazy. I’ve only lost 2 plants. I’m going to plant mint and rosemary in their place. Today I feel peaceful, content and calm. There is a lot of dreams to follow!

[lizbeth4]

Thanks I-did-it for your positive post! I think gambling thoughts will always pop up for us. But we can resist! At this point I have no one to be accountable to but myself. No more barriers can be put into place. Although I have a lot of worries about my youngest Daughter and my Granddaughter, I know she has to try it on her own. I’m really hoping she succeeds. She has my support. I will always be there for her. The biggest barrier that I can put into place is remembering what gambling robbed me of. That’s my biggest detourant. I have a lot to look forward to. Many dreams and goals ahead of me. My Mother’s situation may be sad but she has 2 Daughters who love her and will take good care of her. Life is pretty good!

[lizbeth4]

My gambling urges have lessened. They are still there but I’m managing my impulses and I haven’t gambled. I spent the day with my Mother. We played games and had dinner together. She is very aware of her failing memory. Although we’ve had serious issues, I’ve decided that I will take care of her for as long as possible. I called about my refund and it was mailed instead of direct deposited. 10-15 business days before I see it. Maybe the mistake was a intervention of some sort. I’m sure my urges will be gone by then and I will still have my money.

[lizbeth4]

Today I’m having strong gambling urges! Luckily my state refund hasn’t hit my checking account yet. I’ve watered my garden this morning and did some yard work. Now I’m doing laundry but the urges haven’t lessened. I know the urges are from my Daughter and Granddaughter leaving and my Mother’s worsening dementia. STRESS!! I just want to stop everything so I can take a breath. I’m going to make it through the day without gambling. I really have no one to turn to but this site and the people here. I trust few people concerning my addiction.

[lizbeth4]

Thanks i-did-it for your post! I text my Daughter and she and the baby are fine. My Daughter worked today for a friend, doing some handyman work. She has more work for the next 2 weeks. She said it was a good day. I’m going to devote my weekends for my jewelry making. First, I need to replenish my supplies and buy some new tools. Once my refund goes into my account, I can order what I need. There are no bead and supply places here. Since I will be making necklaces in new techniques, I’m excited! Who knows? I might create a website or try selling on EBay also. The possibilities are endless! I am keeping focused and moving forward. Gambling is in the past.

[lizbeth4]

I-did-it, Great post! My urges happen less often and I recognize my triggers. I’m glad that we are gamble free. Life is a lot better! The support here is amazing and a big part of my recovery. Has it been extremely quiet here lately? I hope you have a great day!

[lizbeth4]

My Daughter and Granddaughter are in the city. I spent the morning getting hugs and kisses and snuggles from my Granddaughter. She was aware that something was going on. I prayed to my higher power last night and I have faith that everything will work out. I had gambling urges this morning but I went home and watered my garden and roses. I’m doing household chores now! I knew I would get urges as my stress level have been high. I made a list of house maintenance projects that need to be done. Some are small but there are a few major ones. I’m capable of doing them all. This will keep me busy. I intend on working on my jewelry on the weekends. I will keep the weekends opened for that. My Sister is coming back in 12 days as we need to fix a few things at Mom’s house. I’m completely invested in not gambling.

[lizbeth4]

My Daughter and Granddaughter are moving to the city tomorrow. I helped her pack up her van and spent most of the day with my Granddaughter. I’ve had a upset stomach all day. I’m so worried that she will relapse. I’m being supportive but voicing my worries. She has promised to come home if things don’t work out and to keep in contact with me. I’m sure going to miss seeing my Granddaughter everyday. Yesterday my sweet Grandson called to tell me he loved me. He made my day! My state refund was processed and will be deposited to my account in 2 days. It will pay the second half of my property taxes and my HOA fees for the year. Another debt paid. I need to be very conscious about not gambling. When I’m upset, stressed, I seem to relapse. I can’t do it again! I have to keep myself busy.

[lizbeth4]

Hi Monica, Wow, you’ve been busy! I’m very happy for you that things are changing in a positive way. Keep going. It will be a adjustment for you when Pete has moved out but change is good! Take care!

[lizbeth4]

My Sister just left to go home. My Mother’s Day was Good! We made dinner at home and played card games. I enjoyed spending time with my Sister. She has talked me into making jewelry again as she is making jewelry. I’m going to try some new techniques and venture off of my usual stuff. If all goes well we are going to sell our items at local craft shows later this year. Maybe for Xmas. It will give me something to do during the winter also. My Daughter is waiting for her tax return money so she can move back to the city. I’m really trying to be positive and supportive . It’s hard! I will miss my Granddaughter. My garden is taking off. I have a lot of strawberries and my peach tree is going to have a lot of fruit. I have many home projects and maintenance to keep me busy. I have to remember to take time for me. I deserve it! No gambling =peaceful Life!

[lizbeth4]

Thanks i-did-it and Laura for your supportive posts! My Sister arrived this afternoon. She had a long talk with my Daughter and basically reiterated everything I had said. Our big concern is that she has no family support there. She gave me the most beautiful Mother’s Day card. I feel like I’ve done the best I could and that she will call me if she needs me. I want her to do well on her own. I’ve made a life board so I have a visual reminder of my dreams and goals. I have a chart listing all of my debts and I mark them off when they are paid. I’m a visual person and this helps keep me on tract. Some I have the last creditor a payment this month, I won’t be getting internet till June. I’m managing fine without it. I had enough money to rent movies and purchase a few more. I was able toi buy my Mother some beautiful orchids and her favorite candy for Mother’s Day. Life isn’t perfect but it’s so much better without gambling!

[lizbeth4]

Today my Daughter and Granddaughter came back from the city. She’s decided that she wants to live there. I knew this was coming and I understand her reasons. She plans on moving in with a friend who also has a young daughter. We talked and she is taking her time and making sure that everything is solid before she moves. I reiterated that I’m always here for her and I’m being supportive. This has prompted me into making plans for myself. Exercise is on the top of my list. I’m going to keep chipping away at my debt. 22-30 months from now and all of my debts will be paid off. I’ve set up a repayment plan with the newest creditor who wouldn’t agree with the debt consolidation plan. They will be paid off in 9 Months. I can see the light at the end of the tunnel. I’m already planning a week long road trip via car instead of RV when this goal is met. It’s a place I’ve wanted to see. It’s time to take action and to put my traveling desires into reality. I think that gambling and the consequences have made me want to fulfil my dreams even more. Life is short and it’s time to take action!

[lizbeth4]

Laura, seems like you are real busy! It’s so much better than the alternative, gambling! My Daughter and Granddaughter have been in the city for almost a week, so it’s been quiet here. I took my Mother shopping and out for lunch yesterday. She’s getting so fragile. I’m glad that my Sister will be here this weekend. Her visits are few because she is still working. My house and garden are my peaceful places. My paradise. I’m very fortunate to have found this place. I’m grateful everyday! Life is getting better for me without gambling.

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