[kin]

1. I tried many different ways since Aug 2005 in recovery to stop my addiction, I could stop but could not stay stop.
2. The damage was so thorough and destructive, it wipe me out financially, emotionally, mentally, spiritually and physically.
3. my last bet was on 23 April 2024 after trying to stop for 20 years. My slip was so painful and disappointing that I am willing to do anything to stop.

I am 58 years old now, what would I advice myself if I am 21 years old how to stop my addiction.
1. It is either black or white, there is no grey. Right is right and wrong is wrong. Follow a way of life that does not lead me to addiction.
2. If God can help me to stop my addiction in the name of Jesus, I will follow their way of life. This is how I started praying to Father God in the name of Jesus.

I notice my anxiety, worry, fear and stress was reduce to a very manageable level until I could stay stop.

• This reply was modified 12 months ago by kin.

[kin]

Dear Heavenly Father,
Please help us to live one day at a time.
Please help us to fix our eyes and focus on You today.
Please help us to enjoy one moment at a time.
Please help us to accept hardship as a pathway to peace.
Taking, as Jesus did, this sinful world as it is, not as we would have it.
Trusting that You will make all things right if we surrender to Your will.
So that we may be happy in this life and supremely happy with You forever in the next.
In Jesus’s almighty name I pray, Amen.

[kin]

Start: 23rd April 2024
Today: 14th February 2025
Consecutive Gamble free days: 296

[kin]

I heard one sharing, the person works long hour, he needs to take his mind away from work, he needed a break and rest from work, he visits the casino, the place helps him to forget. He ended up losing a huge sum of money after some time.

I heard another sharing, the person talks about the uncertainties and unknown future, the anxiety, fear, stress and worry makes the person press the self-destruct button and place the first bet thinking he can improve the situation but ended up losing everything he had.

Both incidents have haunted me for a long time until I started praying. Praying has help me to reduce the unmanageable feeling and moment until I could remain gamble free longer than my willpower and determination can last me.

[kin]

from worry to worship, from burden to blessings.

my last bet was 23rd April 2024

[kin]

from fearful, helpless and hopeless, insecure and desperate, stress to calm and peace, confident and hopeful, joyful, secure and safe

from uneasy, irritating, anxious, discontent and restless, stressful feeling to calm and peace, gratitude, contented, quiet and still feeling

[kin]

I read in Gambler Anonymous, Alcoholic Anonymous, Narcotic anonymous …

Step 8: “Made a list of all persons we had harmed and became willing to make amends to them all.”
Step 9. “Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.”

And I found the power from the Bible to carry that out. I found my Savior, my Lord, Jesus Christ in the Bible.
The Bible became my compass. Jesus Christ become my Higher Power.

God’s word in Matthew 5:23-24 gave me a direction.
Lord Jesus gave me the strength and courage when I was weak to love and care for my family and others.

Matthew 5:23-24
“Therefore, if you are offering your gift at the altar and there remember that your brother or sister has something against you, leave your gift there in front of the altar. First go and be reconciled to them; then come and offer your gift.

Matthew 5:23-24 was one of my favorite verse in repairing relations and making amend to my family and others.

The Bible tells us, “Your word is a lamp to my feet, and a light to my path” (Psalm 119:105).

Dear Heavenly Father, I ask and pray for Your continue guidance over us Lead us to do what is pleasing in Your eyes. Protect us from evils, do not let us fall into temptation. In Jesus’s almighty name I pray, Amen.

All praise and all glory to my Creator, my Lord and Savior. Amen.

[kin]

I will be stress when I experience uneasy, restless, irritating and anxious feeling. This happens to me many times in a year.
– Whenever the weather changes, my facial eczema will flare up.
– Whenever I am gamble free and I have craving and urges facing temptation.

In the past, I will gamble and drink to find relief and escape from these feelings.
I allow the gambling and drinking to happen, I did not do anything to stop myself.
I just wanted the uneasy, restless, irritating, anxious feeling from stress to go away or disappear.

I am still gamble free since 23rd April 2024.
Since my last relapse, I have been using prayers to stay gamble free.

Ever since I started praying, I still experience uneasy, restless, irritating and anxious feeling but I have learn to live with it.
In the past, the bad feeling only grow stronger and stronger until I cannot manage and relapse.
After practicing regular prayers, nowadays the level of uneasiness, restlessness, irritation and anxiety was reduce until I could manage to remain gamble free each time.

• This reply was modified 1 year, 1 month ago by kin.

[kin]

Hi risingphoenix,

Wishing you a Happy and Blessed Year in 2025.

[kin]

Speaking to a new recovering person reminds me that the power does not come from me, I, myself. I need to stop playing God. The power comes from God and the 12 steps recovery program. Anyone new always ask the question how to stop

Step 1 part one will help us to work on our powerlessness over gambling. It was really crazy to try and control this beast that we have no control: It was really foolish and insane to keep on doing the same thing over and over again and expecting a different result.

Step 1 part two talks about our life becoming unmanageable as a result of gambling. We start to be honest that we have a big problem, we have lost control in many areas of our lives mentally, emotionally, spiritually, physically, financially, relationships and career because of gambling.

Admitting and accepting I had a gambling problem helps me from becoming proud and keep me humble. When you are in a hole, you stop digging, otherwise it only makes matter worst, the hole become bigger and deeper.

My way does not work. When I listen to me, I, myself, I always get into trouble.

Stop now. Stop the first bet.
You only need to stop today. Tomorrow you do the same.
Take it one day at a time.

• This reply was modified 1 year, 2 months ago by kin.
• This reply was modified 1 year, 2 months ago by kin.
• This reply was modified 1 year, 2 months ago by kin.

[kin]

Amended copy

Some carry the message that you need to take care of yourself before you go out to take care of others.
Some carry the message that you need to take care of others, and the Higher Power will take care of you.

[kin]

April – day one

I was very worried that I do not have enough money to pay up a five-figure sum of money for a big purchase which has a dateline in Jan 2025. I was stressed, anxious, restless, and insecure.

Renovation at home lasted from 25 April to 7 May. It caused a lot of stress from inconveniences to my daily living. I was also worried about the additional financial burden from the renovation.

I gambled and lost money on 23rd April. I knew that I would need to do something different urgently otherwise nothing will change in my life. I approached a gambling support group at a church and joined them. When they pray, I pray along.

May

There was rumor of change in my work which threaten my job and income security. I was afraid, worried and stress. The hot weather is causing my eczema to flare up, it is not helping, it made me more stress.

June

The rumor was true. The location and nature of my work change. It was very tiring and stressful to adapt to new changes at work.

July

The challenge was almost similar to June

August

Different doctors were saying the same thing after reading my medical report. My gallbladder burst, there was tear in the gallbladder. I was hospitalized for 7 days for a keyhole surgery to remove my gallbladder. It was pain before and after surgery. It was hard and suffering. I have no appetite to eat, I had pain on my abdomen whenever I move.

September

I was on two weeks of hospital leave. The pain stayed for 3 weeks before it disappeared after surgery. I return to work. I have lost 12 kg.

October and November

My dateline for payment of a big purchase item was getting closer. I need to stay employed and save up. I was getting more and more stress and worried that money was not enough.
The change in the weather cause my eczema to flare up again at this time of the year. It causes me more stress and anxiety.

3rd December

The result over the last 7 months was very encouraging. I did not feel pressurized to stay gamble free, it happens naturally.

Whenever I have thoughts to feed my urge and craving, the urge and craving did not grow stronger because the praying reduce the anxiety and stress to a manageable level, and help me to remain clean and sober.

I have been eating more than I should, I have regain 8kg and I have saved up the full sum for a payment in Jan 2025 that worried me the most this year.

I have learned to enjoy the peace from praying and I intend to do this for the rest of my life.

[kin]

April – day one

I was very worried that I do not have enough money to pay up a five-figure sum of money for a big purchase which has a dateline in Jan 2025. I was stressed, anxious, restless, and insecure. I gambled and lost money on 23rd April.

I knew that I need to do something different otherwise nothing will change in my life. I approached a gambling support group from a church and joined them. When they pray, I pray along.

May

There was rumor of change in my work which threaten my job and income security. I was afraid, worried and stress. The hot weather is causing my eczema to flare up, it is not helping, it made me more stress.

June

The rumor was true. The location and nature of my work change. It was very tiring and stressful to adapt to new changes at work.

July

The challenge was almost similar to June

August

Different doctors were saying the same thing after reading my medical report. My gallbladder burst, there was tear in the gallbladder. I was hospitalized for 7 days for a keyhole surgery to remove my gallbladder. It was pain before and after surgery. It was hard and suffering. I have no appetite to eat, I had pain on my abdomen whenever I move.

September

I was on two weeks of hospital leave. The pain stayed for 3 weeks before it disappeared after surgery. I return to work. I have lost 12 kg.

October and November

My dateline for payment of a big purchase item was getting closer. I need to stay employed and save up. I was getting more and more stress and worried that money was not enough.
The change in the weather cause my eczema to flare up again at this time of the year. It causes me more stress and anxiety.

3rd December

The result over the last 7 months was very encouraging. I did not feel pressurized to stay gamble free, it happens naturally.

Whenever I have thoughts to feed my urge and craving, the urge and craving did not grow stronger because the praying reduce the anxiety and stress to a manageable level, and help me to remain clean and sober.

I have been eating more than I should, I have regain 8kg and I have saved up the full sum for a payment in Jan 2025 that worried me the most this year.

I have learned to enjoy the peace from praying and I intend to do this for the rest of my life.

• This reply was modified 1 year, 2 months ago by kin.
• This reply was modified 1 year, 2 months ago by kin.

[kin]

It was very discouraging for many who suffer in silence for many years.

They saw others who are able to get their lives in order while they have struggled to function with everyday tasks which has led to their relapse.

It was not so straight forward for those suffering from both addiction and mental illness. Treating mental illnesses like depression, anxiety, post-traumatic stress disorder, ADHD, impulse control disorder, obsessive compulsive disorder and others is crucial to address the problem that leads to gambling for them.

It was easy to stop, the difficult part is staying stop.

• This reply was modified 1 year, 2 months ago by kin.
• This reply was modified 1 year, 2 months ago by kin.

[kin]

Many carry the message that you need to take care of yourself before you go out to take of others.
Some carry the message that you go out to take of others, the Higher Power will take care of you.

Hi jvr3419,

Good job!

[Author]

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