[kathryn]

Hi All,
Well today is a new day.  Dames and i had a chat this morning and we have let it go.  As he said, we were so ready for the results to say that Sasha was his, that the shock of her not being his was enormous.  We really did take Fester (that is the last time i will say her name) at her word. I have to wonder if she wasnt expecting us to do the DNA test.  Also, we have to wonder if he ever slept with her at all, i am doubtful.  He told me that he remembered getting up in the morning and only having to put on his shoes, he was fully dressed.  Anyway, unless we hear anything else from them, the topic is now CLOSED!!!!
So today, i am going shopping with Brea.  As its fathers Day on Sunday (is it the same everywhere else?) we are going shopping for Dames. Brea bought him a crucafix to wear around his neck and the chain is broken so we will either buy him  a new chain for that or i was thinking of a watch. 
I have my Amazing Race night with Jode tonight.  She is in her new house, its beautiful and yesterday she was having the cupboards and shelves fitted out in her walk in pantry.  She rang me at 7am.  They had arrived early so her and the kids came over for breaky.  It was lovely.  She has also found out that one of her foster children is going to permanent care, which means he will never go back to the mother.  Now THAT is amazing news for her. She is a born mother that one!!!
Yesterday, in my Oscar speech, i left out one important person (dont they always?) I want to say a big thank you to Harry, who stopped me from going insane, for keeping me level headed and rational (well most of the time) and who listened to me going on for hours at a time.  H, the crystal ball is now in a million pieces, thank you so much for putting up with a ranting, raving luntic woman and always finding something positive to say. You have the patience of a saint!!!
I hope you all have a wonderful, gamble free day.  Im feeling a lot lighter today, the weight is slowly lifting and i am starting to unwind.  Time to start living again, taking it one day at a time.
Take care, bye for now, Kathryn xxFighting the good fight…One day at a time

[kathryn]

Good Morning Everyone,
Now im proboably going to sound like an Oscar winner but….first id like to thank God (only joking) I just wanted to say thank you all soooooo much for your support throughout all this, I have such good friends here and you all helped me get through this hard time. 
Fester rang Damian last night (I was at work) and was extremely upset, saying that the test was wrong.  She said ‘I know that you are her father’,  and you know it too!!!! Dames said the DNA doesnt lie and offered to do another test.  Fester said that Sasha didnt want to, that Sasha had said we could all go and get F’d.  I can only imagine what that woman is saying to her daughter.  I know she wants to believe it but the results are the results. So she did the next best thing, which was to put doubt in Damians mind that maybe the test was dodgy and it was wrong!  He was very angry when i got home.  I kept saying to him that the lab (its called genetrack) was not dodgy, i had done my research before ordering the test, blah blah blah.
So our wonderful happy night turned to crap basically.  I was floating when i got home, and there was a lot more room in the lounge now that the elephant had left the building! I got up early this morning, i wanted to see Damian before he went to work.  He said he had thought about it and wasnt going to let her put a guilt trip on him.  I told him that she was grasping at straws, as if she was going to tell Sasha that she had slept around, so im guessing that she will tell Sasha her whole life that Damian is her father.  At least then she wont look like the ***** she is.  And she is not going to want another test either because she knows that the test is right.
I sent her a copy yesterday, she will get it today.  I also messaged her last night with the number of the company and suggested she call it if she had concerns about their credibility.  She messaged back saying thanks, but they are not going to pursue it as ‘Sasha’ doesnt want to. Anyway, its not our problem anymore, although if she comes back and wants another test we will be there (but im not paying for that one)
I am hoping that we never hear from them again, that it is now well and truly behind us and we can move on with our life. 
Thanks again everyone, i cant quite believe i didnt gamble through all this, good lord i wanted to. But if i can go through something like this and not gamble, i can conquer anything!
Take care, bye for now, Kathryn xxxFighting the good fight…One day at a time

[kathryn]

Hi All,
Well the results are in……
DAMIAN IS NOT THE FATHER !!!!!!!Fighting the good fight…One day at a time

[kathryn]

Hi All,
Well i spent the whole day yesterday moping around, waiting…..with no result.  I have woken up this morning and decided i am going to take Megs advice.  Im putting my hands in the air, letting go and just going with the flow.  God only knows when the results will be there, Fester is pestering Damian about the results, bloody cheeky considering she didnt tell him for 15 years!!!
I was so tired last night, exhausted from the anticipation of what? Nothing.  We will know when we know, hopefully it will be soon, if i could choose it would be this week as i have my 4 day weekend and if i want to cry i can without worrying about going to work. I am on my 81st day gamble free, i thought about gambling a lot yesterday, but im not letting this situation send me backwards.
Have a great day all, i will certainly be trying to keep busy, bye for now, Kathryn xxFighting the good fight…One day at a time

[kathryn]

No news yet, looks like we wont know now until tomorrow…this is excruciating!

[kathryn]

Hi All,
Well im not going there today, im sure you are all sick of hearing about it.
Im working all weekend so i just wanted to pop a post in and say i hope you all have a lovely weekend.
Bye for now, Kathryn xxFighting the good fight…One day at a time

[kathryn]

Hi All,
I need some advice, my head is going round and round and i need help to straighten it out. 
Ive been thinking about what is going to happen when the results come back.  Ive got some what ifs going on and im not sure how to handle this one.  Ok, what if…the results come back positive, we organise a meeting with Sasha and Fester wants to be there.  Does she have the right? I want to tell her to F off personally, but i know we have to handle things a bit delicately.  I dont think she has any right at all to be there, i dont want her there because i think ill punch her ugly fester face in.  I do not, under any circumstances want her to have ANYGHING to do with my children. Now, Damian doesnt want her to have anything to do with her either, it will just be between Damian and Sasha and no one else. He will call her or vice versa. 
Am i being unreasonable? I dont see how she needs to be involved.  This may not even happen, but some advice on how to handle it if it does would be very helpful.
Thanks, have a great day, bye for now, Kathryn xxFighting the good fight…One day at a time

[kathryn]

Velvet and Meg,
You funny funny funny girls…what a hoot…i laughed so hard i cried.  Dames and i did have a chat tonight while i was at work, i called him on my tea break and we are going to come up with a plan on what we are going to do whatever happens.  At least that way we know where we are headed, and being a need to know person, i like to be organised!!!!
I feel better knowing he is ready to talk, i need to get it straight in my head so i dont go crazy. Fester messaged him tonight, wanting to know whats going on, mind you she didnt send her swabs until almost 2 weeks ago.  I still cant stand that woman, the thought of her makes me cringe. 
Anyway, all is ok with me tonight, im feeling calmer and the laugh i had was just the medicine i needed. Thanks girls!!
Have a great day all, bye for now, Kathryn xxFighting the good fight…One day at a time

[kathryn]

Hi All,
Al, Vera and Paul, thanks for your posts.  I just wanted to brag really….i was playing the Wii with Harry and you can do this training session that tells you your fitness age.  I did mine and it said 29!!!! Woohoo. While all the woohooing was going on Harry was saying ‘mum, i won, i got 48’.  God bless him.
Have a great day everyone, bye for now, Kathryn xxFighting the good fight…One day at a time

[kathryn]

Fester and Sashas swabs have arrived at the lab.  The tests will be completed on the 31st. I dont know if we will know then or the next day.  Im getting back on the rollercoaster folks, i hope you are prepared to come with me on the ride. I need you all now more than ever.
Bye for now, Kathryn xxFighting the good fight…One day at a time

[kathryn]

Sorry, before i go to work i just have to say……WOOHOO!!!!! The mother in law has gone to stay with her other son for 2 nights.  You wouldnt think she has 5 children, she always has to stay with us.  Rang Dames and he said WOOHOO!!! All is well in the world.
Bye All, Kathryn xxFighting the good fight…One day at a time

[kathryn]

Hi All,
Firstly Sherry, thanks for your post, i wouldnt be surprised if we were interfering with the fertility of frogs, sometimes we are very hard up for news and you wouldnt believe the things they put on there.  Personally, i havent heard that one!
Anyway, on to my weekend…i have had my mother in law down for the weekend. She came Friday and is leaving our abode tomorrow.  Firstly can i say that i do love her, BUT….she is exhausting.   Because the whole world revolves around her when she is here i spend my time running around after her, buying her beer (she pays of course), i just have to drive to the bottle shop, just general running around for her and after her.  I have barely seen Damian, because he has been in the shed with her the whole weekend and yes, i could go and sit in there with them but i cant cope with her talking to him like he’s 5 (‘ my little boo boo baby!!!’)
She drives him crazy, she never, and i mean NEVER stops talking, about anything at all.  We decided that tonight we were going to watch the movie ‘Wolverine" and for you ladies out there it is definitely worth a look, Hugh Jackman, no shirt, muscles bulging….sigh!!! Anyway, back to the topic…..so im trying to watch while she is going on and on about these amazing pots and pans she has at home, by the way, she bought us one, and i made white sauce in it tonight for our roast lamb dinner.  I went to scrape the leftover sauce in the bin with a spoon and she screams ‘aaaahhh, dont use a spoon, you’ll scratch it’, to which i replied, ‘i am almost 40 years old and i think i can clean a damn pot without scratching it and if you dont like the way i do it then take it home with you!!!)
Yes, somewhat harsh, but i have been on the edge for 3 days and had had enough.  So she thought that was a great joke and laughed.  Anyway, im trying to watch Hugh in all his glory and shes yap yap yapping.  About pots. 
I am sure you have all got it by now…IM OVER IT!!!!!
So in closing, my weekend was pretty crappy, im tired, im edgy, i havent spent any time with Dames.  We did go to the party last night….dont ask. I had 3 drinks and was in bed at 8.30, what a rager i am!!!
I hope you had a better weekend than me, personally, im glad its over and i think i need a weekend from my weekend.  She will be back in 5 weeks for the wedding….God, help me!!!!
On a positive, i didnt gamble and if anyone was going to drive me to it it would be her!!!!!
Have a great day everyone, sorry bout the rant (im not really) bye for now, Kathryn xx Fighting the good fight…One day at a time

[kathryn]

Hi All,
Today is my 71st day gamble free, i didnt realise had gone past the 70 day mark.
Anyway, i have my mother in law down for the weekend. She is a good stick, although she drinks A LOT and gets very loud and rowdy.  Im not a drinker so i usually end up going to bed to the peace and quiet. She had taken the boys out for breakfast this morning so it is lovely and quiet here.
Im not doing a lot today, im going grocery shopping and i have to take Harry for a haircut…he decided that his hair was getting in his eyes so he cut some off so he could see…his hair is pure white so it is very noticable.  Hes decided he wants a spike…there goes the beautiful blonde locks.  Mind you, he has a big chunk out of the front so a spike will be much better that the current look.
We are going to my nephews 18th tonight, i will have a few brews there, mind you, i dont need many!
I hope you all have a wonderful gamble free weekend,
Bye for now, Kathryn xxFighting the good fight…One day at a time

[kathryn]

Hi All,
Velvet and Nancy, thanks for your posts, i will be installing betfilter…i still find it a little wierd that i even considered it for one second, it was a fleeting thought but one that i have to ensure doesnt sneak back up on me.
I have a relatively busy day today, im going to get my monobrow made into 2, i need to buy a new kettle (damian dropped ours in the sink full of water) and im going to have a coffee with a friend i went to highschool with.  Shes great and was a big help with my finances when i stopped gambling.  I now have 4 days off, which i really need, just to relax and catch up on some housework.  I have a funeral tomorrow afternoon, my auntie Betty…she was a resident at the aged care facility i work at, and i watched that poor woman go from an extremely large woman to a bag of bones.  So i am taking mum with me, shes the sister of Betty’s husband.  As awful as it sounds, i will be catching up with a lot of my family that i havent seen for years so that part will be good.
I went and had a meeting with my boss last night when i got to work, in regards to the new workload that we have now.  I told her it was unrealistic and i made a few suggestions that still have us doing the same job, but lighten the load on the second round, which is the problem.  She was pretty good really, i just told her how it was, that we werent coping, and she got me to go through all the meds that can be given at 5 instead of 8, which turned out to be 7.  That will make life a lot easier for us. Ive never really stood up like that before, so i was pretty proud of myself.
Well, i hope you all have a wonderful gamble free day,
Bye for now, Kathryn xx
PS: Velvet, you know you can stay with me anytime you like, im just not sure where i can put you, you know, with the elephant and all!!!!!
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxFighting the good fight…One day at a time

[kathryn]

Thank you Nancy and Marilee, those words were appreciated more than you know.
I feel that i am in limbo at the moment, that the world is standing still until these results come through, the way its going it will not be till next week so i have a ways to go.  I actually feel emotionally empty right now, i have no feeling, i am numb.  What i do know is that it will be ok, whatever happens.  It feels like its taking an eternity.
I actually thought yesterday that i might have a look at an online gambling site.  That thought was quickly erased but i am going to install betfilter.  I have never ever thought of online gambling before, and i  never thought i would consider it, the need to zone out is pretty strong at the moment, so i had better get on with it before disaster strikes.
Dont get me wrong, i do not want to gamble, i have come to far to want to go back there, i just need to pop up another barrier to reduce temptation.
I hope you all have a wonderful gamble free day,
Bye for now, Kathryn xxFighting the good fight…One day at a time

[Author]

Posts