[kathryn]

Vera,
If someone had taken my debit card i dont know what i would have done……i do know one thing, and so do you my friend…….NO MONEY = NO GAMBLING!!!!!!!!!!!!
I havent taken his debit card, but i will if i have to. 
I do not believe that he is a compulsive gambler, in saying that, i will not tempt fate.  We have talked about it, there is no hiding as far as i can see, and i have looked…….hard!
The post was more about me Vera, and less about him.
Lets get real.  Life happens.  I cant be wrapped in cotton wool and i wont be.  As i said, i will not become complacient,i will not allow ANYONE to risk my recovery and i will do what ever necessary to ensure that.  
I have worked too damn hard to get here and as far as im concerned there is no going back for me….ever!
As for the job, there really isnt much to say.  It is so quiet there, ive done all i can to set up.  The owner is a bit tight fisted so i dont have a lot to work with.  I cant see myself settling there.  It will do for now.
CC, thanks for posting, i am so blessed to have you in my corner, thank you xxxx
Take care K xxxxxxx
 To live, that would be a great adventure – Peter Pan

[kathryn]

Hi All,
So, interesting times at the moment.  Firstly i have started my new job, it was ok, its very quiet and ive pretty much done what i can in terms of stock etc so im not sure what im going to do today!!! The people i work with are very nice so thats something although the receptionist is only 18 so as you can imagine we only have so much in common!
Its my home life that has my eyebrows raised at the moment,  My husband has been gambling.  He has been gambling quite a lot in fact.  He has the delusions of grandeur, not to win money but to flash money around although im sure winning does have something to do with it. He has been going down to the local pub and has been at ‘my’ venue quite a few times with his brother and his friends.  We have discussed it, i asked him why he was needing to gamble and he said he didnt know.  I have decided that if it continues i will take his debit card off him. 
While i dont think he is compulsive, i think this needs to be addressed.  My addiction was/is slot machines, he likes a ‘little’ bet on the horses.  In saying that, i feel that all too familiar flutter in my stomach beginning to return.  I dont like that feeling.  Him gambling and coming home to tell me all about it makes me uncomfortable to say the least.   He is honest about it, i can access all accounts and believe me i have checked.  He is truthful about what he spends but i have said that this cant continue to which he agrees.  So we shall see.
As for me, i remain watchful and aware of my feelings and thoughts at the moment.  Im not willing to risk my recovery. 
Take care,
K xxxTo live, that would be a great adventure – Peter Pan

[kathryn]

Good evening,
So tommorow is my last day of work, then 2 weeks to enjoy before starting the new job.  Im getting excited at the prospects there.
My daughter left for Bali yesterday.  I was so excited for her, and im so pleased that we were able to send her for her 21st birthday present.  I truly hope she has a wonderful time, shes already starting posting on facebook and shes only been there for a day!!!!!
Im pretty content at the moment, its a nice feeling.  I feel like im finding the peace i have craved for so long.
Take care my friends, stay safe,
K xTo live, that would be a great adventure – Peter Pan

[kathryn]

Hiya CC,
I am working my last week at my current job and have a 2 week break in between so not much to tell at the moment.  I will post when i have more news.
Life goes on, and im just going along with it…..sad to read of some relapses here, a little scary too, seeing that it really can happen to anyone.  Just proves that we can never let that addiction creep back in.
Hope all is well in your world, so happy to read you are gamble free,
Love K xxxTo live, that would be a great adventure – Peter Pan

[kathryn]

Dear Dear Larry,
One of my favourite people here at GT, i am sending you the biggest hugs across the world. Your struggles have not been in vain, having the courage to come back and post, wow, you never cease to amaze me.
Larry, i know that sometimes words are just that, your words however, are a truth here, and ones that i truly respect. 
I think you have been given good advice.  You know what you need to do.
Love K xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
 To live, that would be a great adventure – Peter Pan

[kathryn]

Morning all,
Sunday morning, i SHOULD be in bed and yet, im  sitting here drinking coffee. .. I am having a terrible time with my sleep at the moment and if you know me you would know that sleeping is the thing i do best.  I can sleep anywhere, anytime…..so why am i waking up/sleeping poorly?  Hopefully it will pass.
I am working today, im doing a 10 day straight stint.  Normally i wouldnt be too happy but next Saturday my annual shopping trip is on and all the extra $$$ will come in very very handy indeed!!!!!  We leave at 6.30am, its a massive day and i love every minute of it..lol.
No other news for me this week, boring boring (not that im complaining!)
Take care, K xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
 To live, that would be a great adventure – Peter Pan

[kathryn]

Hi All,
CC, i start on the 5th November, Vera, i simply dont like confrontation, simple as that, and the fact that one of my bosses is a little ‘unstable’…….she turned out the be the most understanding of them all!
Love K xxx
 To live, that would be a great adventure – Peter Pan

[kathryn]

Well all the worry is gone, a new chapter is begining, I have resigned. I’m relieved, my boss was fine, shocked but fine. I’m working all weekend so I’ll be busy and I don’t want to leave work with anything unfinished.
Thanks Laura, for asking!
Love k xxxxTo live, that would be a great adventure – Peter Pan

[kathryn]

What a beautiful morning,
Its 6.30 am and I’ve been sitting on my balcony watching a huge flock of pelicans fly by. I am not a bird watcher. It was lovely having that peaceful moment, today is the day im resigning and I feel sick about it. I have to do it and I will but it doesn’t make me feel any less nervous.
Anyway, must go get ready, I’ll keep you posted, hope you are all well and happy,
K xxxTo live, that would be a great adventure – Peter Pan

[kathryn]

Unbelieveable……….CC I was going to post today, you must have read my mind.
I’m so happy to read of your progress, you are doing great odaat! Ive had a lot going on and feel unsure of myself at the moment . I feel my recovery has been too far from my mind lately and I need to bring it back to the forefront and do a bit of work on myself.
I am about to embark on a new job, I haven’t told my boss yet and I am quietly terrified, I don’t like having to do things like this,, its more complicated than me just leaving and I’m expecting a bit of backlash. It makes me feel nauseous and I’m dreading the thought of the next month.
I have been a bit of a party animal the last 2weeks. I am not a drinker usually, I’m not sure if I’m feeling a little freer these days but I’ve had a few too many much to the disgust of my husband. I tend to be a binger so for that reason I am abstaining for quite a while. I did have a cigarette on Saturday night and I think that scared the hell out of me. I have always believed that if I have 1 I’m a goner, 1 cigarette, one dollar in a machine and I’ll be straight back into it. What scares me is that I was able to have a smoke and be OK, not want another one. I don’t want to think that its OK. I am so fearful of going back there. I don’t think I trust myself. I don’t know what I think…lol.
Anyway, just a small check in, I’m still here, reading, I’m finding it hard to find my words lately.
Take care my friends,
K xxxxxTo live, that would be a great adventure – Peter Pan

[kathryn]

I hear that B…….
Sorry about your aunt, I’ve had no computer as my charger died and I’m still,l waiting for the new one…..! I have an iPad now, hence the mistakes. Just wanted you to know I’ve missed being here xxxxx
K xxxxxxxxxxTo live, that would be a great adventure – Peter Pan

[kathryn]

I hear that B…….
Sorry about your aunt, I’ve had no computer as my charger died and I’m still,l waiting for the new one…..! I have an iPad now, hence the mistakes. Just wanted you to know I’ve missed being here xxxxx
K xxxxxxxxxxTo live, that would be a great adventure – Peter Pan

[kathryn]

Hi all,
I have had no internet connection for weeks hence my dissapearance from the forum……
Velvet, thank you, today is my belly button birthday, in fact its almost over…… I had. a lovely day and received this iPad I’m typing on (halleluja, I’m back
Life is going well, no major dramas. I will however say that I’m saddened by the new rules of gt…I am fortunate that it benefits me as a non UK person but my god there will be many of you I will miss dearly…..
That’s all I have for now, I will be around
K xxxxxxxxxxxTo live, that would be a great adventure – Peter Pan

[kathryn]

Thanks for bringing me back to the top Maverick, and yes, life does manage to take over.
I was actually going to post about something that happened on Wednesday night,  we went out for dinner and i didnt have enough cash on me so i went to the atm.  It told me i had to go and see a staff member, which i did.  This machine is the newest idea to help problem gamblers and i have to say, i  think it just might help, not work, but help in that i know for a fact that i wouldnt be going to a staff member to ask for money more than once.  Sure, i could go and find an atm somewhere else, but what a hassle! 
We all know that if we want to gamble we will, but i suppose any little extra thing that can be a deterrant cant be bad.
Ive got a busy weekend on, 2 parties, one at my place so i had better go and start getting organised.
TAke care everyone,
Love K xxTo live, that would be a great adventure – Peter Pan

[kathryn]

Good Morning,
I had a great weekend, we went to a wedding.  It was fantastic, we ate, drank, danced and laughed.  My mum was a clubbin mama, she danced all night and at almost 82 she did a great job and i got some wonderful photos.  It was beautiful.
LIfe is going along ok.  Im still in limbo regarding work, i do know that whatever happens its what is meant to happen.  Im in no hurry to move on.  Everything will work out.
Anyway, a quick update before getting ready for work, i dont seem to know so many here anymore, but im so happy you have found this site and i hope it helps you as much as it helps me.
Take care,
Love K xTo live, that would be a great adventure – Peter Pan

[Author]

Posts